To think I'm the only one still living a distanced life...

[ciarachats]

I'm still strictly distancing, because, well
that's the rules!
But I know very little people that still are.!!

The thing is, I'm so miserable because of it.

I have a 7 month old baby that my mum hasn't held since March. My mum
works around a lot of people and I've not felt like it's a good Idea for her to hold the baby.

I've barely seen friends because the weather is rubbish for outdoor meet ups!

We can't go for coffee because how do you stay 2m away from someone and drink a coffee in a shop together?!
Same for going for lunch or a drink etc.

It's all starting to drive me crazy and I really miss seeing properly.

How long are we expected to keep this up for!!

Should I just stop this now and get back to normal?!

@nc600

You are taking it to extremes though OP. You are exaggerating too. Nowhere in the UK has been so grim this summer that you couldn't go for a stroll and and outdoor coffee/pint with a friend.

You're saying that all places you could go have "tiny tables". Ok, go somewhere with a big table and sit at opposing ends of it. Even better, somewhere with sofas or big armchairs. Very spaced out they are

Another thing you could do is invite them to your home or go to theirs. Sit 4m apart if you must. You could invite a group round if you stay in the garden.

I say all of this as someone who has followed the guidance and continues to do so.

@nc600 as others have said. The weather hasn't been great these last few weeks!!

@Jaxhog where did I make a stupid statement? It is a truth that viruses have always been present. Not always as severe as Covid but even so. Your post to me was pathetic.

Did the North not get that amazing heatwave for the first two weeks of August?

@FluffyKittensinabasket

My parents are doing childcare so they won’t be socially distancing from baby when it’s born.

I don’t see how random strangers taking care of a baby in a nursery is any better than my parents looking after baby!

The risk of any activity magically reduces if there's a card reader involved.

Where are you that you couldn't plan half hour with a friend? You're making excuses and exaggerating. But even if you're not, is there a reason you can't meet with a friend at home?

"Did the North not get that amazing heatwave for the first two weeks of August?"

Yes, the whole of the UK basked I believe

The weather has really only turned in the last couple of weeks and really, unless it's raining you can meet outside. Wear a coat!

You can meet people for coffee, you don't have to wear a mask when eating or drinking.

You CAN see people, if you are choosing not to then that's a different matter.

@nc600

"Did the North not get that amazing heatwave for the first two weeks of August?"

Yes, the whole of the UK basked I believe

Bloody Cornwall didn't.

We had two weeks of thick fog.

Did the North not get that amazing heatwave for the first two weeks of August?

Errrmmmmm nope, pretty sure I would have remembered that, think there were a few days of heat hell but nothing consistently nice.

@ciarachats I am assuming you are in England?

I am not sure what all the rules are in your area but you have to do what you feel comfortable with.

You could meet a friend for a walk round the park, wear a face covering if it helps.
Get a takeaway coffee and sit at either side of a bench if you feel comfortable doing that.

Once you have done this for the first time it might make it easier to do it again as sometimes we build the risks up in our head and the idea of it is worse than doing it.

I am still following all the guidelines, I know I am allowed to go to restaurants, pubs, cafes, etc but I don't want to so I am not, I didn't go much before lockdown anyway.

I go to my mum's house and visit for a few hours, sometimes my other siblings come as well. We try to keep as distant as possible but we probably do come closer than the 2 metres advised.

But you have to feel comfortable in what you are doing, no one can tell you what you are doing is wrong but there are things you can do (still within the guidelines) that might make you feel a bit happier and less isolated.

@Babs709

Did the North not get that amazing heatwave for the first two weeks of August?

We had a couple of stifling hot days but rain and thunder was also forecast so couldn't make firm plans.

Have been eating outside in pub gardens & cafes since 14 July & I've traveled to various places to visit people & go on holidays

Lots of places have introduced;
One way systems
Hand sanitizer
Extra cleaning
Track & trace
Pre booking
Social distancing
Mask wearing
Extra seating
If you are worried that you have the virus ( showing symptoms) you can arrange for a test

During August, Mondays, Tuesdays & Wednesdays have been discounted food & drink available from participating businesses to encourage people to get out & about & support local employers & their staff

I live in an area with local restrictions, so households are not allowed to mix. I live alone and WFH so back to isolation, I haven't seen friends since July. So yes I am obeying all the rules and I don't know how much longer I can carry on like this

OP I think you and some others are so focused on the details that you’ve lost sight of the bigger picture.

Yes, coronavirus can be serious and yes we we should all take precautions to reduce transmission. But this has be to weighed against other factors eg mental health, maintaining connections with family etc.

So yes, reduce your contact with others but don’t sweat the small stuff. It’s not an all or nothing situation. So for example I’ve reduced my opportunities to contract or pass on coronavirus significantly by: working from home instead of commuting by Tube; not being able to go to events I’d usually go to (eg gigs, theatres); wearing a mask & increasing hand washing. By doing all these I’ve reduced my interactions with others by maybe 80-90%. There’s no way I’m going to fret about the 10-20% of interactions that I’m still doing, including going to restaurants, shopping (yep, including for non essentials and random browsing), meeting up with friends, seeing family etc.

Life is never risk free and I think constantly thinking about ‘the rules’ and trying to reduce risks to 0% is probably bad for your mental health and probably counterproductive in a lot of ways.

It's depressing that you're living like this out of choice OP. I would understand it more if you were at special risk. You're making up / exaggerating rules and making yourself feel better by convincing yourself that we all should be following the same.

You can meet friends, indoors or outdoors. At your home, another person's home, in a pub / restaurant / cafe, in a park, for a walk etc etc etc. You don't need to stay 2m apart.

You can see your mum in any of the above places. She can wear a mask if you're worried about potential asymptomatic transmission.

You are free to travel, to spend the night at other people's homes, to get your hair cut, to use public transport for any purpose, to shop for anything that takes your fancy. There are in fact very few things you are still no longer permitted to do, even if you are following every rule to the letter. How is it true to say that social distancing has not been relaxed when at one stage you were confined to your home excepting essential trips to shops etc?

You are seeing what you want to see. Why you want to see restrictions where they don't exist is puzzling.

I’d be interested to know if the OP and others religiously sticking to their interpretations of the guidelines are like this in other areas of life. Do they always drive 30 mph or less in areas with a 30mph speed limit? Do they get extremely angry at someone driving at 35mph because they perceive it as putting them at risk? I doubt they do...

It seems that for many people as Covid is a new risk they can’t process it in the way they do with pre-existing risks. So the knowledge that cars can be dangerous & potentially fatal is not a reason for panic, but the emergence of coronavirus is a cause for massive panic and a unrealistic desire to eliminate all risk in relation to it.

As so many people have said there are multiple ways to engage with your friends and loved ones. In fact so many as we’re outside in summer.

The people who are not extremely clinically vulnerable that are choosing not to do that are being self-sacrificing martyrs and cutting themselves off for their own rather pathetic reasons or have serious post/natal issues

I still am OP. It's hard but for me it's easier just to keep to the rules as much as possible than to deal with the anxiety of worrying about getting ill

"
It seems that for many people as Covid is a new risk they can’t process it in the way they do with pre-existing risks. So the knowledge that cars can be dangerous & potentially fatal is not a reason for panic, but the emergence of coronavirus is a cause for massive panic and a unrealistic desire to eliminate all risk in relation to it."

No, it's simple knowledge of how viruses work which seems to be something that is lacking.

The more people who get it, the more it is passed on. Exponential growth.

There are rules for a reason. The government know that a certain percentage won't follow them so they make them stricter than they need to be to make up for that. So I stick to what we're told (this is non UK though.)

"are being self-sacrificing martyrs and cutting themselves off for their own rather pathetic reasons or have serious post/natal issues"

Honestly, read that back to yourself. Would you ever say that to someone's face?

I make decisions based on the facts presented to me. If someone else wants to go out and do whatever, that's fine, I don't call them an idiot or suggest there's something deficient in their personality. I just assume they have different life experiences and a different personality to me. Perhaps you could grant those who make a different choice to you the same level of respect?

In the end, there's a reason that 50,000 people died in the UK, whereas Korea, of a similar size and wealth, lost only 300.

We're still following the rules OP.

There's strong science and maths knowledge in our friend group as well as high comprehension and conscientiousness so everyone understands the relative safety of different distances and exceeds rather than undercuts current guidelines.

We've been to one picnic which was supposed to be socially distanced but wasn't strictly, but we were outside so hopefully no harm done. We also have occasional visitors in the garden at a 2m distance. I'm going to try an outdoor coffee with a friend this week.

It would all be a lot easier to be honest if some people hadn't misread the situation and "gone back to normal".

@nc600

Where are you that you couldn't plan half hour with a friend? You're making excuses and exaggerating. But even if you're not, is there a reason you can't meet with a friend at home?

@nc600 I don't feel comfortable having people in my house. 😔

As has been mentioned, it's not 1m, it's 2m or if that's not possible, 1m PLUS some form of mitigation.

I'm following the rules too OP. I am seeing friends, but only one other household at a time and outdoors. Thankfully we've managed to find quite a few outdoor things for the kids to do.

I'm very low risk and so are all of the people I would like to see. I think the risk in my area of the country is pretty low too.

I'm not following the rules because of the risk though, I'm following the rules because they are RULES. The same reason I don't go around breaking other rules of the land.

I'm fed up too. I think a lot of restrictions will be lifted once the kids have been back at school for a couple of weeks though.

Up to date rules...

www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-51506729

www.bbc.co.uk/news/explainers-52530518