Spidey senses set off neighbours partner

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Buckle up this might be a long one so as to not drip feed...

Woman and three kids moved in next door a year ago and things didn't start off well. Her mum kept parking in front of my drive and other drives in the street. I ignored it the first couple of times till i reached boiling point on a rainy night and had my baby in the car and couldn't park due to her car being in the way.

There was possibility an edge to my voice but tried to ask politely as i could for her to move her car which she did. Anyhow, have been given the cold shoulder ever since but i live and live.

Next problem is new partner on the scene there every day and has also taken to parking in front of my drive way. I've ignored it so far as have been without a car for the last few months. Only when I'm expecting guests to i ask for car to be moved.

Inconsiderate parking aside there is something that creeps me out when ever we cross paths. Besides the occasional hi I've not spoken to him at all but there is just something about him that sets off my spidey senses.

Add to that i notice her partner is never there when what I presume is a social worker visits the mum. (this officious looking guy with a clipboard vists the house every fortnight so can only assume he's a social worker but then again not sure)

I know the above is a lot of assumptions and don't really know what I'm looking for sharing these hunches or if the parking issues have influenced my perception of him.

Am I being unreasonable to feel this way?

'Could you not park over my drive any more? If you're finding it difficult to park, would it help if I gave your details to the guy who's here with his clipbaord every fortnight? He always seems to find a parking space, you don't ever seem to be around when he is, should I let him know you're usually around and having difficulty?'

That should sort it.

Why is it sad to not have a connection with neighbours. They do their thing and we do ours, we say hello in passing but we don’t need to be best buddies simply through geographical closeness.

@FizzyGreenWater

'Could you not park over my drive any more? If you're finding it difficult to park, would it help if I gave your details to the guy who's here with his clipbaord every fortnight? He always seems to find a parking space, you don't ever seem to be around when he is, should I let him know you're usually around and having difficulty?'

That should sort it.

Why would you do this, imagine telling your neighbour ‘I watch your visitors and your behaviour!’ Utterly crazy!

@BashfulClam

Why is it sad to not have a connection with neighbours. They do their thing and we do ours, we say hello in passing but we don’t need to be best buddies simply through geographical closeness.

Definitely this. It also makes it an awful lot easier to sort an issue out if an invariably when they occur. Get too friendly and it can become a problem if they take this piss to sort them out.

If a car is taxed and insured it can be parked anywhere, even directly outside your house in your perceived spot

RTFT. The offending cars are parked across her driveway.

The parking issue sounds frustrating. The rest just sounds like your imagination going wild.

I have met quite a few children’s social workers through my job. I don’t think I’ve ever seen one with a clipboard and they usually try not to stand out. Why have you decided that he’s a social worker, rather than a private tutor, support worker, probation officer, or any number of jobs that could involve visiting someone regularly?

If he tends to visit at around the same time every fortnight, it’s not unusual that the same group of people are there every time. Maybe the partner is at work or has a regular hobby at that time?

YANBU they sound like wronguns

Ugh. I think that's all I have to say about this OP.

It’s been said a lot already but...I used to work with vulnerable children and adults and have encountered dozens of social workers over the years - they do NOT carry clipboards.

From experience, doorstep lenders and the police do.

I think you need to try and work out what is disconcerting.

@crosstalk

If a car is taxed and insured it can be parked anywhere, even directly outside your house in your perceived spot

RTFT. The offending cars are parked across her driveway.

Exactly! It's not just outside her house, it is blocking her drive and that's just not on.

Could it be Jehovah’s Witness they always come to my house with a clipboard?

Pressed post too early! Just think it’s a bit extreme to jump straight to social worker from a parking problem!

I hope that the batshitness hasn't scared of the OP, I think she is YANBU. Spider senses are there for a reason. I don't think she is a curtain twitcher and we are ultimately part of a community. A community stands or falls by it's ability to care for those who need it and being vigilent about suspect behaviour or abuse is everyone's responsibility.

OP I wouls contact SS. It is suspect that the boyfriend makes themselves scarce if someone official turns up. And the stats for abuse from live in partners are shocking.

ps i'm typicg on a soft keyboard 'cause my laptop needs fixing.

@JohnMcCainsDeathStare

I hope that the batshitness hasn't scared of the OP, I think she is YANBU. Spider senses are there for a reason. I don't think she is a curtain twitcher and we are ultimately part of a community. A community stands or falls by it's ability to care for those who need it and being vigilent about suspect behaviour or abuse is everyone's responsibility.

OP I wouls contact SS. It is suspect that the boyfriend makes themselves scarce if someone official turns up. And the stats for abuse from live in partners are shocking.

ps i'm typicg on a soft keyboard 'cause my laptop needs fixing.

Please don’t contact children’s services because this man is a parking arsehole. There’s no evidence to waste time suggesting the children are being abuse. Unless there’s something additional, nothing you’ve said warrants contact to an overstretched service.

P.S. OP, social workers tend to have access to technology like other 21st century humans.

Thanks to everyone who's commented on this post (even those who've not been so polite) I always come away with a fresh perspective on things

This is what i love about mumsnet, its a safe space as such where i can voice my most inner thoughts and yes i fully expected a tongue lashing it was fascinating hearing the opinions of some folks

Like i said i have nothing to go on but a hunch so don't feel comfy calling social services and don't think there's anyway of finding out if the kids (or mum) are ok but we're unlikely to be having chats on our doorstep like I do with the other neighbours on the block 🙁

I have a physical revulsion at just the THOUGHT of kids being abused so it is totally plausible that I see a boogie man on every corner

Anyway thanks for the feed back, and I promise to stop using spidey senses 🤣

I would'nt call SS frivolously but it doesn't hurt to keep your spidey senses in mind. you are decended from ancestors who did after all.