What is this obsession with coffee???

[QueenofmyPrinces]

MN seems to be obsessed with coffee....

Someone wants to meet up with friends....they are advised on MN to go for a coffee.

If someone is meeting a guy for a daytime date....MN suggests they go for a coffee.

If someone wants to ask a guy out but is shy....MN suggest she gently ask him out for a coffee.

I just don’t get it. Does nobody drink tea anymore?

In fact, the only time I see a cup of tea being suggested is if someone is in shock or very upset about something that has just happened....they are told to try and calm down and have a very sugary tea.

Every time I read a thread and see coffee as being the ‘drink of choice’ I feel inner rage

In case you hadn’t realised, I am an avid tea drinker and I can’t even bear the smell of coffee, never mind entertain the idea of ever actually drinking it

YABU : yes coffee is always mentioned on here but that’s because it should be the drink of choice.

YANBU - I have no idea why coffee is always suggested and it seems very unfair to simply brush aside the good old English cup of tea

Jars of coffee aren't that expensive either.
But coffee from a jar is foul.

I only buy a coffee out about once a week too, but I use real coffee at home the rest of the time.

It's been a thing since Georgian times. Coffee houses are where people met to chat and do business.

I always invite people out for coffee but only drink tea. Or a ridiculous frappe thing if too hot, or maybe hot chocolate in winter. I do offer people at work "hot beverage of your choice" and ask DH to meet in a cafe as tea would mean food. Tried to go to local place with loads of tea but booked out today so ended up in cafe instead.

Looking for a nice neutral place to meet people and linger, not into pubs or fancy dining.

No one actually likes coffee. They either train themselves to like it, or disguise it with sugar and frothy milk

I like black coffee without any sugar in it (I also like coffee in almost any other form ), I wouldnt say I was 'trained' to like it. My dad drinks several cups of very strong coffee a day and I've always loved the smell of it, I was allowed sips of it from about the age of 8.

YABU tea is awful 🤢

For me at least there is a time of day element to the terminology.

Going out for tea is more of an afternoon activity where you go to a tea shop and have tea and a cake or if you are feeling greedy a cream tea or full afternoon tea.

Going out for coffee generally happens in the morning and without any cakes. I generally drink all my daily coffees before 2pm.

I know what you mean. I always say, do you want to meet up for a cuppa?

Tea drinker here. I think people should say hot beverage like Sheldon Cooper of Big Bang Theory says.

I like tea and coffee and wine, sparkling wine including Prosecco, Champagne, single malt whisky, a lot of spirits, water, juice, real ale, lager, stout

did I learn to like all this or did it just happen naturally?

I don't drink tea and only took up coffee recently. Going for coffee just means meet up in a cafe for a drink and maybe cake. Last time I met a friend for coffee I had a lemonade.

I watched a TV programme last night and there was a woman on it telling her friends about a date she’d been on...

Woman:We met up for a coffee at midday and at 6pm we were still there. So for 6 hours we just sat there talking, it was wonderful.

Her friend: six hours of drinking coffee?! You must have been totally hyped up?!

Woman: Well no because we weren’t actually drinking coffee.

I don’t care if it is a ‘done thing’ to say this, it still makes me laugh

Move to the north OP, then you can circumvent the issue by going for a brew instead.

Let's go and have a brew.
Shall we meet for a brew tomorrow?

I do dislike the word beverage. I hate the way it's used in the US and Canada as a prudish way to avoid saying 'drink', which might be taken to imply alcoholic drink; so supposedly giving an upstanding, if twee account of the beverage-offerer. When the real consequence is the implication that they're a nation of alcoholics, who have to be distracted away from thinking about alcoholic drinks, at all times of day.

I do dislike the word beverage. I hate the way it's used in the US and Canada as a prudish way to avoid saying 'drink', which might be taken to imply alcoholic drink; so supposedly giving an upstanding, if twee account of the beverage-offerer. When the real consequence is the implication that they're a nation of alcoholics, who have to be distracted away from thinking about alcoholic drinks, at all times of day.

Interesting.. having grown up in the US and traveled all over I have never heard anyone say beverage...

Coffee.. yes..
Drink/Drinks.. yes
Beverage.. No

I didn’t hear beverage until The Big Bang Theory came out.

And what a weird implication about over 350 million people..

@IntermittentParps

Jars of coffee aren't that expensive either. But coffee from a jar is foul.

I only buy a coffee out about once a week too, but I use real coffee at home the rest of the time.

Not necessarily. I keep fresh coffee, a premium instant and a barista instant in the house for occasions when I fancy coffee rather than tea. Like all of them. Ground coffee is for after a nice dinner with which wine has been drunk. Barista blend mid morning and premium instant after lunch.

I first came across 'beverage' on Air Canada, then on other north american airlines and in hotels. 'Would you like a beverage?'. I think it's used in those sorts of international settings to avoid misunderstandings. Only in North American international settings though, IME (wouldn't be surprised if also elswhere). Not on British airlines though. They've always been happy enough to say drink and let you choose whether you'd like a hot drink, a soft drink or an alcoholic one.

Talking about 'the north american use of...' does not imply 'all north americans...'. That's just a misreading. Rather 'a useage peculiar to that part of the world (IME)'.

@QueenofmyPrinces

I watched a TV programme last night and there was a woman on it telling her friends about a date she’d been on...

Woman:We met up for a coffee at midday and at 6pm we were still there. So for 6 hours we just sat there talking, it was wonderful.

Her friend: six hours of drinking coffee?! You must have been totally hyped up?!

Woman: Well no because we weren’t actually drinking coffee.

I don’t care if it is a ‘done thing’ to say this, it still makes me laugh

But she doesn't even imply she was drinking for 6 hours. It doesn't even work as a joke! She says we went for a coffee and sat where the coffee had been served for longer. My reaction to the woman suggesting she would be all.hyped up would be that either she was a bit thick or was just really bad at making jokes.

In fact the only time I hear Brits talking about beverages is in the form of 'bevvies', which are definitely alcoholic!

That's a classic example of the way proscribed speech just moves on (you 'ban' one word, so the concept just shifts to another word) and, more so, of the British tendency to puncture pomposity and prissiness and take the piss - in this case by getting pissed (most definitely drunk, not angry).

@lottiegarbanzo

Yet, you called it prudish only to say you’ve only heard it in places where there are lots of international travelers so used to stop misunderstandings then go on to say that the implication is that these countries are full of alcoholics. I guess I can understand culture-wise but still think it’s a bit of a rude thought because it’s something that is different from your culture.

People "go for a coffee" which is any beverage drunk in a cafe or coffee house. There's have been around since at least the 17th century. So where did people meet for a tea before? They didn't. There were alcohol drinking establishments the inn/ the ale house, and there were gentleman's clubs. So people went "for a drink" as people still do in alcohol drinking establishments.

So "go for a coffee" is day time meet and "go for a drink" is meeting to drink alcohol. Coffee has always been a drink we went out for, whereas tea has been the drink of choice for at home (with the exception of afternoon tea). Obviously there are people who drink tea out and drink coffee at home, but that's not how language develops. It comes from our historical preferences as a society , not from our current preferences as an individual

Coffee drinker here. Tea is a disgusting flavourless drink and the only thing I could never get to grips with about living in England.

I absolutely love coffee. Usually live off the stuff, but I'm pregnant now so not only am I not supposed to drink it, it completely repulses me. My trips to the shops, and my mornings, my lunch, my afternoon biscuit are just not the same now and ismts very depressing. I can't wait till this baby is out 😂

@phoenixrosehere I do find the use of 'beverage' prudish. I do think it subverts its twee, 'presenting our best and blandest face' intention by implying a societal problem with alcoholism on the part of the culture using it.

You don't like those thoughts, tough, you can lump them, or choose to ignore.

My lived experience is that parts of particularly Canadian and some American cultures retain a strong protestant-derived prudishness and repressiveness about drinking, nudity and other things, which is usually combined with, yet in stark contrast to, a cullture of raging capitalism, acquisitiveness and violence. (e.g. when showing and categorising films; endless hideous, mind-numbing violence - absolutely fine. Tiny bit of nudity in the course of a perfectly nice, harmless, plot-enhancing sex scene - OMG, slap an R rating on that, or cut the scene when showing it on TV). I find that not just weird but totally fucked up and socially damaging.

But I'm getting away from coffee, other drinks and twee 'beverages' there. I continue to dislike the term beverage.

I hate 'beverage' too. Used by people who think it makes them sound more clever/professional/important. Makes me think of salesmen in mid-range cars who also say things like 'sit down for a chat with myself'.