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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To want my neighbour to stop parking in my spot

423 replies

KangarooAtTheZoo · 25/08/2020 14:46

I have an allocated parking spot in a cul de sac. It's on the deeds to the house and we have the freehold so we own the parking spot. We don't own a car but we use the spot for visitors alot. A neighbour has started parking in our spot every day even though they have 2 spots and there are communal spots (his household have at least 3 cars I think). It started in the lockdown as we had no guests. I have left notes on the car and asked them not to park in our spot because our guests can't use it and it's blocking access for me to get my pram out when there is a car parked there (there is narrow paths and bushes either side). When I have confronted him he says just ask him to move his car when you have guests. But the last two times we had guests he didn't answer the door so my guests couldn't park there. And why should I be inconvienced by him parking on our property.
What options are left now? I assume police and council can't do anything? There is a property management company that manages the communal area because some people own half the property and pay half rent to this company but I assume because we own the freehold they can't do anything? Can I put a parking bollard on my spot? I'm also worried if it goes on for to long they can claim rights to the parking spot. Thanks for any advice

OP posts:
DrinkFeckArseGirls · 31/08/2020 10:23

I’d start bouncing your DS’s ball on the bonnet. Or the windscreen. Wherever. Bope that’s a lesson for your DH Hmm

PerveenMistry · 31/08/2020 10:24

@WeBuiltThisBuffetOnSausageRoll

In MN language, you don't (just) have a neighbour problem - you (also) have a DH problem. Does he not realise how irritating and inconvenient this has been for you? Does he never take the pram out? Are none of your visitors his family or friends?
I would be enraged with the DH.
Trikc · 31/08/2020 10:35

He sounds awful. Have you managed to speak to anyone else in the house? Are they any more approachable?

Backtoschoolnotsoonenough · 31/08/2020 10:36

Can you bump it and set off the alarm maybe?
*not suggesting you are large of arse op!!

OneForMeToo · 31/08/2020 10:40

Chuck some bird seed on it to encourage eating and pooping.

wizzler · 31/08/2020 10:44

Tbh I would have spent the morning throttling Dh who has just undone any progress you have made

PaternosterLoft · 31/08/2020 10:49

How many times have you pointed to the car and said I TOLD YOU SO to your DH?

ThumbWitchesAbroad · 31/08/2020 10:50

Go for the lipstick option. Or go and put your bins in his space. I know that's not exactly the point, and doesn't help with your pram issue, but if he's going to take your space, you take his.

WeBuiltThisBuffetOnSausageRoll · 31/08/2020 10:56

Your DH did you a great disservice in not backing you up, but I'd turn that around and make the best of what you're left with.

Tell the CFN (or send a letter if you prefer) that your DH isn't normally home when you need to host and facilitate visitors and it also isn't usually him who has to try and get the pram out, so he probably isn't fully aware of the issues; but nevertheless, he still graciously allowed what he was led to believe was an additional car (owned by a visitor and not the normal homeowner) to park on your property for one evening only as requested and agreed.

As this is just the latest in a long line of 'confusion' over whose legal property the space is [tinkly little laugh], you're now going to instal a lockable bollard to make things much more straightforward, so that everybody knows exactly where they stand.

Wellthatsit · 31/08/2020 10:59

Wrap his car in clingfilm.

nosswith · 31/08/2020 11:00

I like the dirty nappy idea but the bollard at some point seems the solution to me. Can't offer any suggestion about the DH though.

WeBuiltThisBuffetOnSausageRoll · 31/08/2020 11:06

In the meantime, I'd be very tempted to put up a sign saying "For Sale: Very Cheap" right next to the car, in a way that makes it look very much like it's the car that's for sale.

If he comes storming over, just tell him that the sign is referring to the hideous small ornamental 'autumn dolls' that you make out of twigs and sell for a few pence to bring cheer and brighten up people's homes in this mournful season of earlier, darker nights. So sorry if it's not clear - you'd planned to put a display box of them on your drive, but somebody (presumably a rival with a similar business) has put a car in the way, so there's no room to do so.

GabriellaMontez · 31/08/2020 11:06

Your DH is a real people pleaser?

You mean apart from you? He doesnt give a flying fuck about everything you've said and how much you're inconvenienced as long the neighbours like him?

LakieLady · 31/08/2020 11:18

Send your toddler out to play in the front garden. I suggest a nice game of throwing rocks, or painting with brake fluid.

If your front garden has grass, a few good smears of vaseline along the side of the CF's car and then mowing the grass in the messiest possible way might be amusing. If the mower should accidentally scrape the car, that would, of course, be tragic but absolutely unavoidable. If no grass, the front might possible need pressure washing. Or maybe you have some bookshelves or something that need sanding down with a power sander, it's far too messy to do that indoors. Afterwards, they'd need painting or staining, and if it's a nice day it might be best to do that outdoors.

Your spineless twat of a DH has completely undermined your efforts to date. I hope you make him read the latter part of this thread so that he realises what a pillock he is.

I'm thankful that mine is a real grudgemeister with a deeply malicious imagination. If this happened to us, he'd be in the kitchen with pliers, bending nails into those things that puncture tyres.

It was him that told me about sticking a potato up the exhaust pipe of cars that park so they make it difficult for you to get in and out of your drive. The car starts fine, but after a few miles just die and won't start. This might only work on petrol cars though, I'll ask him when he's back from the shops.

JazzaGal · 31/08/2020 11:19

It doesn't matter if you have a car parked there or not. It is a private space and no one else can park there. Don't enter into a conversation about usage.

They have been allowed to park there without permission and have then taken the piss by not answering the door. Your DH needs to get with the programme. They cannot ever park in your space.

PerveenMistry · 31/08/2020 11:21

@GabriellaMontez

Your DH is a real people pleaser?

You mean apart from you? He doesnt give a flying fuck about everything you've said and how much you're inconvenienced as long the neighbours like him?

Yes, this is what I was thinking. DH is more worried about pleasing the asshole than backing up his own wife.

I couldn't tolerate that.

WeBuiltThisBuffetOnSausageRoll · 31/08/2020 11:32

Your DH needs to quickly learn the difference between the kind of people who will occasionally ask you for a favour and also offer you favours (or frequently agree if you ask for something small), never seeking to take advantage; and the sort who think that the whole world is theirs for the taking by default but that they are only thwarted by unreasonable people who simply can't accept this and dare to stand in their way.

Unfortunately, you have to assume that people might fall into the second category and proceed with caution until you've had a chance to get to know them properly and determine that they are the friendly 'give and take' sort firmly in the first category.

charlestonchaplin · 31/08/2020 11:34

I can’t believe you’re still battling this. I would have asked him politely to move his car twice, explaining that I have no desire to have to ask for permission to use my own property. My next step would be to purchase those difficult-to-remove ‘No Parking’ stickers and place one on the front windscreen (driver’s side) and one on the driver’s window.

I doubt they would park in my spot again but if they did I’d repeat until I have the money for a bollard. It has to be more inconvenient to park in your spot than to park elsewhere.

Sometimes you have to come down hard and fast or people will take you for a fool.

LookItsMeAgain · 31/08/2020 11:45

Time for your DH to go over and get this sorted. While he might want to be a people pleaser the 'people' he currently needs to please is YOU!
So, DH is to go over to the neighbour and say that he didn't mind them parking in YOUR spot when it was an overnight thing, just the once but as it is YOUR spot, they have to move the car or you'll get it moved for them and they can expect the bill as they are trespassing now.
They have overstayed their welcome.

KaptainKaveman · 31/08/2020 13:22

Oh for Heaven's sake just bloody well go over there and demand that he moves the car right now. NOW!!!

They obviously think you and dh are a pair of right chickens.

LakieLady · 31/08/2020 13:57

I agree with @KaptainKaveman. CFN now thinks you're a pair of wimps and consequently he believes he can do what he fucking well likes.

He's an arrogant tosser.

DishingOutDone · 31/08/2020 13:59

Oh you're married to a people pleaser. Your whole life will consist of varying degrees of mitigating his fuck ups.

I didn't realise this was an actual type. Explains my StbExH! Only good thing though is I am a witch and all the neighbours hate me.

DishingOutDone · 31/08/2020 14:00

(As in they don't dare park in my space!)(didn't mean I do stuff with frogs)

DidoAtTheLido · 31/08/2020 14:52

Is the neighbour /CF fully informed and aware that it is your land?

Smelborp · 31/08/2020 15:05

I would try and ting their doorbell again at 11pm. And maybe midnight. And maybe 6am. They’re bound to be in then.