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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

to wonder if school uniform should be worn

204 replies

manicinsomniac · 21/08/2020 17:57

I know all the arguments about school identity and poorer/less fashion conscious children not being teased. And I've always agreed with them. Plus I just like uniforms.

But I've been helping with a charity over the summer (a clothing bank) because it does big school uniform events where people can come and get their uniforms for free. It was a really hot day when we did the first one and, due to a combination of the number of people who turned up and Covid rules meaning only 5 could come in at once, many of them queued for 2 hours!! It actually really upset me that so many people are in a situation where it is preferable to queue for that long to avoid spending maybe £20 (don't actually know?) in the supermarket.

All the children who came in had clothes. The only reason they needed the uniforms was because the schools say so.

AIBU to think that really, when families are struggling this much, uniform just isn't that important?
YABU - uniform is important
YANBU - I agree with you, it shouldn't be needed

OP posts:

jewel1968 · 21/08/2020 20:38

Some is guidelines and some is statuary e.g.

The School Admissions Code 2012, which is statutory guidance, states “Admission
authorities must ensure that […] policies around school uniform or school trips do not discourage parents from applying for a place for their child.” No school uniform should be
so expensive as to leave pupils or their families feeling unable to apply to, or attend, a school of their choice, due to the cost of the uniform. School governing bodies should therefore give high priority to cost considerations. The governing body should be able to demonstrate how best value has been achieved and keep the cost of supplying the uniform under review.

Mintjulia · 21/08/2020 20:43

As a working mum, I like uniform. There are no arguments or even debate in the morning. It's quick, cheap (compared to other clothes) and every child is the same so there's no cause of bullying.

Backtobasics5 · 21/08/2020 20:46

@latticechaos yes not whilst raising my DS. However I don’t think everybody is going to find a hoodie for 50p and you would need 2/3 of these items. I don’t think George’s prices are extortionate do you? Even on a tight budget?
I think it’s coats and shoes what cost the most.

rabbitheadlights · 21/08/2020 20:48

@Mintjulia not necessarily the case as above my ds faced bullying and snide remarks for having the "wrong" trainers

latticechaos · 21/08/2020 20:55

[quote Backtobasics5]@latticechaos yes not whilst raising my DS. However I don’t think everybody is going to find a hoodie for 50p and you would need 2/3 of these items. I don’t think George’s prices are extortionate do you? Even on a tight budget?
I think it’s coats and shoes what cost the most.[/quote]
Why won't people listen? I did find them, not long ago. Car boots are very very cheap still. Sometimes three items for £1 etc.

You're wrong, I'm sorry but if you haven't been poor with children, how do you know??

OneForMeToo · 21/08/2020 20:55

I’ll admit trainers do still seem to be an issue. I’ll hold my hands up and for secondary I’ve made sure I’ve got nikes for the boy as well as making sure his got a good phone and branded pens/pencils.

Backtobasics5 · 21/08/2020 21:00

@latticechaos to be honest I’m not willing to argue with you. If you think I’m wrong. Fine I’m happy to accept.
Also to be quite frank don’t assume someone’s situation just because I’m not poor. I didn’t say you didn’t find uniform in the charity shop I’m sure you did. What I’m saying is we all need a uniform for our children to wear.... I think the issue is not the non branded things it sounds like it’s the logo uniforms that are costly.

I’m shocked you think £3 a jumper for the whole year is too much

drspouse · 21/08/2020 21:05

My DS was in a non uniform school and we really bought nothing extra that we didn't just fancy having. It was a lot cheaper. Also, you didn't need to buy a full set all the same at once.

latticechaos · 21/08/2020 21:14

[quote Backtobasics5]@latticechaos to be honest I’m not willing to argue with you. If you think I’m wrong. Fine I’m happy to accept.
Also to be quite frank don’t assume someone’s situation just because I’m not poor. I didn’t say you didn’t find uniform in the charity shop I’m sure you did. What I’m saying is we all need a uniform for our children to wear.... I think the issue is not the non branded things it sounds like it’s the logo uniforms that are costly.

I’m shocked you think £3 a jumper for the whole year is too much [/quote]
This response sums it up I suppose . People who don't know what it's like tell you you're wrong and shame you for not having enough money.

£3 is not a lot, but it isn't just £3 is it? It is 2 or 3 jumpers, 2 or 3 trousers, 5 t-shirts etc etc - the list is upthread.

I couldn't afford all that, no.

I hope I never forget, as I always speak up for people with no money at school. I never said a word when I was poor because it was embarrassing, but now I do feel able to say it because I am better off again.

I am shocked people don't know how many people really struggle to buy things most consider cheap.

I don't want to argue but I also feel the poor are very unheard, and that makes me frustrated.

TheBusDriver · 21/08/2020 21:18

Most people who complain about uniform costs are probably kitted out in branded clothes.

Bollss · 21/08/2020 21:20

@TheBusDriver

Most people who complain about uniform costs are probably kitted out in branded clothes.

What a load of shite

Backtobasics5 · 21/08/2020 21:21

Firstly I did not tell you were wrong or shame you about anything. I asked you if you thought it was a lot. I personally don’t it is. I think you need to be realistic. I have given my DS to charity. I don’t think there’s enough uniforms to be found in the charity shops like the way you have put it. You found multiple tops and trousers for £3 in the charity shop. They probably were one offs. The other parents are not necessarily going to be able to get the sizes they need and so on from a charity shop...

latticechaos · 21/08/2020 21:22

@TheBusDriver

Most people who complain about uniform costs are probably kitted out in branded clothes.

That's a cheap insult designed to blame the poor imo.

OneForMeToo · 21/08/2020 21:23

I’ve never brought five tops. I just do washing. One or two tops, two trousers, two jumpers for primary plus one Pe kit.

Secondary 1 blazer, 2/3 shirts, 2 trousers and again 1 Pe kit.

Porcupineinwaiting · 21/08/2020 21:25

But lattice surely youd need more than one jumper etc if there was no uniform? Because my kids have uniform for school they have considerably fewer "civilian" clothes. And as they are teenagers, their uniform is a lot cheaper than the non-uniform clothes they want to wear.

Original poster

manicinsomniac · 21/08/2020 21:25

lattice I'll admit I didn't know (or rather, I hadn't even thought) until the last couple of years doing these clothing bank events.

I literally cried after it was over thinking about how pleased some people were to queue up for so long for things that many of us just throw in a supermarket trolley without thinking. And then I felt like a patronising, privileged idiot for crying!!

I'm sorry you went through that and I'm glad things are better now.

OP posts:

Original poster

manicinsomniac · 21/08/2020 21:28

I have given my DS to charity

Sorry, but that really made me laugh. What was it supposed to say?!

OP posts:

latticechaos · 21/08/2020 21:28

@Backtobasics5

I'm sorry but you're not understanding me.

I was offended by your comment about being shocked I thought £3 was expensive.

For some people £3 is more than they can afford. If that shocks you, you don't understand Britain.

Finding good cheap normal clothing is easy.

Finding good cheap uniform is much much harder.

I could get five assorted t-shirts for £1. But a school t-shirt in the right size and colour in the charity shop is very hard to find.

So I wish we had no uniforms, as it would be better for poorer families.

Namechanger87851 · 21/08/2020 21:28

But if you you are struggeling to buy uniform you’d be struggeling to buy other clothes too surely iyswim?! So at least the uniform removes the pressure of having to find different clothes for every day of the week

OneForMeToo · 21/08/2020 21:31

Honestly I call rubbish. I’ve found £15.50 brand new Pe shirts for secondary priced between £1.50-£5 a top second hand. I can pick up some school bits cheaper than normal clothes. For the amount of time kids spend in uniform if you cannot afford basic basic prices then you need some serious help.

There are tons of Facebook uniform shop swap pages as well as just the general local groups and most schools run a unfurl second hand shop as a way to raise funds.

Over a year I spend more on outside of school clothes and shoes than I do inside of school.

OneForMeToo · 21/08/2020 21:32

Also my local charity shops are the same as primark prices anyway so no savings there.

Backtobasics5 · 21/08/2020 21:32

@manicinsomniac

I have given my DS to charity

Sorry, but that really made me laugh. What was it supposed to say?!

Uniform!!! Hahahahaha I was just making a point that the sets of uniforms I have given away... someone else will buy them. But there’s not enough for every parent to purchase what they need from a charity shop.

MitziK · 21/08/2020 21:33

I've just looked at the uniform for one of my old places. The sixth formers have to buy a suit from the single supplier. It consists of a black skirt (single length - on the knee of a 5'6" female, close fit), black trousers (single length), white shirt/blouse and a black blazer. All polyester. No logo.

Everything is unlined and only available up to size 16/34 waist.

£85 for the blazer. £40 per shirt/blouse. £35 for the skirt and £35 for the trousers. Anybody not wearing the prescribed clothing will be sent home (presumably, if they aren't wearing it because it doesn't fit them, until they go on a diet or chop a few inches off their legs to avoid the 'your skirt/trousers/jacket sleeves/etc are too short' complaints).

Quite frankly, half the staff will be less expensively dressed than they are, and the ones that are will have clothes of significantly higher quality and better fit.

I don't believe extensive, branded uniform helps, especially not when it's making clothing more expensive than the equivalent from a high street store.

Backtobasics5 · 21/08/2020 21:36

@Namechanger87851

Exactly.

slothbyday · 21/08/2020 21:37

Absolutely hate uniform.

When we lived abroad the kids had no uniform at school and they all wore jeans/joggers/leggings, hoodies and trainers - it was so so simple and cost wise was no increase on every day.

Have 3 in uniform now and I hate having to buy it, wash it, iron it - they go through 2 sets of clothes a day so more washing.

One of my kids has a disability and I struggle to find uniform that fits him and is comfy to meet his needs

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