To wonder why women feel pressure to shave their legs but men don't?

[AliceAbsolum]

Not just legs actually. Armpits. Upper lip, etc.

Also, why am I spending money on nail varnish and beauty products that I don't actually need? Is it capitalism that has told women that there bodies are not good enough and need time money and effort to improve?

Why just because I don't have a penis do I feel the need to pluck my eyebrows?!
Is it a Western thing? A growing up in the 90s thing? I feel like my culture is so engrained its like asking a fish what water is. I wouldn't be seen dead in sandles without painted nails... But I'm starting to wonder why now.

I am a lazy hippy sort, dye my own hair, rarely wear make up, and what skin routines I have, I don't value them enough to do the consistently. My husband will happily shag me whatever state I'm in.

I still shave my legs a few times a year, and I can't stand my pubes to be overgrown - feels like they get tangled in my knickers.

I honestly can't see myself as 'conditioned' into it - it's just a physical preference. Clean sheets and fresh shaved legs is as good as sex!

I think some people do care a a lot about this, very much. There will be a lot of people who will feel the pressure to conform, whilst they feel like this the advertisers will keep playing on it.

However, for quite sometime now I no longer feel the need to conform to so called norms just because its what people do or its just whats done. I am now very comfortable with myself and just dont feel the need to even when many around me have thought I was downright odd for doing my own thing.

Basically until everyone feels this comfortable with themselves they will always feel the need to shave legs, pluck eyebrows or what ever it is people just do.

I dont judge them for it, christ, I did it for so long! I'm also interested in social psychology, its an interesting subject so I am always intrigued by stuff like this.

I have never had armpit hair...my leg hair and bikini line are lasered and I have a Hollywood every 6 weeks. I just don't like body hair...even on men. Dh cycles and shaves his legs....also his pubic hair. Trims armpit hair to a minimum.
We are in our 60s and have done for years.
During lockdown, when there was no waxing, I really didn't like the look or feel of it.
It's a personal preference....and I certainly don't look like a 10 year old girl.

@YinuCeatleAyru

So: hair anywhere other than on the head and in 2 perfectly shaped eyebrows is shameful for women. This is because hair on any other part of the body is caused by normal adult hormones and makes the female body look less like the pre-pubescent "ideal" of hairlessness. The ultimate root of this ideal is a deep seated acceptance of a tendency towards paedophilia. even if never acted upon, a man who prefers to see the female body hairless is preferring it to be more child-like. women have internalised this aesthetic and consider their own bodies disgusting if they dare to grow a hair where it is not welcome.

refusing to shave is a revolutionary act that says : my body is acceptable in its natural state and does not need to be shaved, plucked or waxed in order to be beautiful, because real women actually do have hair in numerous places and there is nothing wrong with that.

If that was true about pre-pubescent, then surely women would also feel socially pressured to get boob reductions rather than boob jobs.

And does this mean that women who prefer clean-shaven men also have a tendency towards paedophilia?

It's not about "beauty" and "pampering", that's just how the cosmetics industry makes it look palatable.

Hairy legs on women isn't just "not pretty". In our society it's considered positively offensive and borderline disgusting.

And it's because of patriarchy of course. Every aspect of womanhood must be "regulated" socially until it's almost impossible to get it right.

The patriarchy OP.

I reached this stage a while ago and stopped it all. I’m now at a comfortable stage where I will only shave to truly make myself happy, wear make up if only I want to, whether it’s in public or just around the house. I’m much happier without confirming to the expectation, I must say.

I have hairy arms. Fair downy peach fuzzy hair not coarse dark hair. I have no intention of shaving them but a lot of women do it seems judging by the number of hairless arms I see out and about.

For the same reason that we wear crippling high heels instead of comfortable flats. It’s for the men, though no woman will admit to that of course.

I have never been a conformist, but I do think that it can be a natural preference rather than pressure.

I don’t like having under arm hair, that’s my personal preference.

I always shaved my legs because it was my preference.

I have never worn makeup in my life. And I now haven’t shaved for the past four years because I’m on blood thinners so if I cut myself the bathroom would end up looking like a scene from a horror film. And interestingly, since I haven’t been shaving, the hair hasn’t been growing. It’s not smooth, but it’s not completely overgrown which you could expect, so shaving does actually encourage growth, and then encourage the need to shave and so the cycle continues.

refusing to shave is a revolutionary act

I didn't shave my armpits for years. Back in the 1980's, it was perfectly normal for feminists to have hairy pits and legs. I only started again when I moved out of London in the early 90s and worked in a much more conventional environment where there was a dress code and all that shite.

For some reason, I never felt I could leave my legs hairy. It may be because, pre-Lumea, my legs could pass for gorilla legs if left to grow wild.

Never got into the shaven foof - itchy and horrid when it grows back and the stubble catches in your knickers.

In islam removing pubic and armpit hair is commended.
Arabs and persians sugaring to remove leg and arm hair hundreds of years ago.
I think ancient egyptians used to remove body hair.
Body hair removal is linked to cleanliness and femininity.

@AliceAbsolum, I didn't realise so many men remove their body hair, either.

DP is hairy as Esau, but bald on top. I've offred to take the Lumea to his hairy back, but he declined. What's left of his head hair gets shaved weekly, but the bastard has grown a lockdown beard and I'm really not keen, especially as it's grey and makes him look 10 years older.

Tbh, he looks better without hair on his head than he did with it. Some men do, imo, like Mark Strong and Bruce Willis.

Is it a Western thing? A growing up in the 90s thing?

Neither.

Look at the film actresses of the 1930s and 40s etc. They all had highly plucked eyebrows.

And as Johnnybong says above, in Middle East/Islamic culture removal of all body hair is a thing.

In the 80s on holiday in Europe it was common to see most women with hairy armpits - the N Americans and Brits always seemed shocked.

It’s taken me years to be confident enough in myself to not shave my body hair and still go out in a sleeveless dress. I find shaving annoying and I’m past the point of agreeing to the policing of women’s appearance.

Fuck-It Fifties. Love them.

Of course people care. If anyone posts a thread on Mumsnet asking if they should let their daughter remove body hair, you see exactly how much people care.

Boys nowadays might choose to do some body hair removal but it isn’t expected of them and their mothers aren’t posting here wondering when is the right time for them to wax their legs. I don’t understand how anyone can possibly think that beauty standards aren’t different for men and women.

I remove some hair but I know full well it’s not my preference, it’s because I don’t want people sniggering at me.

My mothers side of the family are muslim, you have to remove your pubic hair (including armpits) at least once a month, facial hair must not touch your lips either. Where as in my fathers religion hair shouldn’t be cut or removed.

Lots of men remove their body hair, especially younger men, I shave my armpits and chest, I also have my pubic hair waxed. I don’t however shave my legs or arms. But as a man I’m not expected to do anything with my body hair to fit the western view of what a man is, where as if a woman chooses not to remove body hair she no longer fits the narrow definition of what a woman should be like.

The obsession with body hair on women is a straight issue as well, generally gay women don’t care about another womans body hair. But straight men and straight women do seem to police it hugely.

Ancient civilizations were sometimes obsessed with hair removal even without ads🤷🏻 It's not something brand new. Egyptians used to remove all hair. In many other civilizations hairless was a sign of richer person.

It's thousands of years of shaving, plucking and waxing. It didn't magically start with tv ads.

Men's grooming market is growing in really fast rate.

Just don't bother OP. You're right, it's basically a female tax / pressure and it's nonsense. Just do you. And find someone who loves you for you, not the made up manicured version of you.

having two quite hairy 10-11yr olds, a boy and a girl, its interesting.

one has been told repeatedly by other kids, they mustnt be hairy, its disgusting, its wrong.

can you guess which one?

the girl. obviously.

How ridiculous, it is your body, do whatever you want with it. I don't have any hair apart from on my head because I like it that way and not because someone/something pressuring me. Just because they advertising razors for women it doesn't mean someone is obliged to use them.

Why just because I don't have a penis do I feel the need to pluck my eyebrows?!
I don't have a penis but tbf I just like tidy eyebrows, so that's why I do mine, to give them more definition and shape. I often look at men's eyebrows and think they need a tidy up, too!

Many men get eyebrows done. My DH gets them trimmed and tidied by his barber.

@SchrodingersImmigrant

Many men get eyebrows done. My DH gets them trimmed and tidied by his barber.

I've been plucking my 17yr old DS's mono-brow since he was about 12

He thanks my side of the family for that!

@WorraLiberty ha! Dh would end up with mono brow too😂 Nothing bad with it if you like it, but he doesn't. Many barber shops have a guy who knows how to do them. Apparently his guy does with a string.