To hate looking young - like a teenager.

[JuliaVerammm]

I am 25 but no way look it.
As in, I could probably pass as 13-15 yr old if you put me in a school uniform.

I am a supply teacher (primary) and I hate my looks. I feel i'm pretty, have a lovely boyfriend so i'm happy. But I feel older ladies often comment on me looking 12, "no way are you a teacher!" ect.

September is looming and it's getting me down that i'm probably going to enter schools and have the "are you old enough to teach this class?" looks again.

I wear blouses, trousers, wedges, heeled shoes but still I can't pass as my own age! I have shoulder length curly hair.

I'm 5'0 and weight 7 stone 7.

I know exactly what you mean, I'm 35 and in the past two years as well as alcohol, I've been ID'd for glue and scissors, and in fact spoons (they had a standard ID check for all cutlery apparently). I'm also 5 foot, perhaps this is a height-ist issue! I also feel like an imposter at work as despite having 10 years experience people often mistake me for a student. No solutions, just empathy.

Enjoy it. I looked like a child till into my 30s. Now I'm 50, I look 50.

I used to get this - it was so frustrating. However, I think a lot of people who are annoyed about passing for being much younger when they're young are thankful for it when they're older. I know that doesn't help you now ... but it may well do later.

One of my uni lecturers was about 5ft tall (or less) but everyone was terrified of her. I think she definitely put on a certain persona so people wouldn’t patronise her

It is a pain when you're young, but you'll age really well. I looked 16 when I was 30, but I'm starting to look my age now. Enjoy it while you can.

I developed a stern look which worked when people were querying my age. It was in the days before photo licences too, so I had to be quite snippy on occasion.

I can't entirely relate but I'm 20 this year and get mistaken for being 16 constantly. I totally agree how annoying it is! I get really offended! But when you have children of your own and care for your younger siblings and people question if you're old enough it's horrible. Like where I live you can't take children to see santa at Christmas if you're under 18 and I took my younger sibling and because I didn't have ID they missed out. And the classic one is sat at table with family and I get asked if I want a milkshake with my meal, expecting me to get excited how a child would! " No I wanted a large glass of wine but now you can just give me the bottle! " It is funny sometimes but just so annoying!! Lol

OP I could have written your post. When I started my current role a colleague kept calling my sweetie and treating me like I was half her age, I was only 2 years younger than her! I always think it’s because I dress younger as I don’t look as young as people think I am I’m sure. I know some people would like being seen as younger but it makes me feel childish and not like a professional working woman (I’m 38!!) In one meeting someone thought I was the apprentice and asked me to make a tea!

Another thing is that when people find out my age it’s such a big song and dance! Omg come here, come here! Guess how old Lionel is! Tell them, them! Yes 38!!! Oh my gaaaaaaaad!

Ah. I understand.
I had a small child at your age and people couldn't believe I was a mum or they thought I was a teenage mum etc. Had some very rude comments, alway from other (older) women.

I am now 30 and do suddenly start to look more my age, I think.

Make sure you have good posture, are assertive, speak in a grown up / direct way. Don't accept 'oh you look so young' as a compliment, if you feel it's said in a patron way call them out - or demonstrate you're professional capacity.

It's so hard.
Do you also struggle to close your purse for all the 20 pound notes? Diamonds on the soles of your shoes too uncomfy?

Gosh sorry about my typos! Blooming phone 😂

Surely it's better to be mistaken for a teenager than to be 45 and mistaken for a pensioner? One of my friends was, recently - she has been through an incredibly stressful time recently and it has affected her looks badly. I hope once she starts to eat properly and look after herself, she'll get her glow back.

The aging process happens to all of us and your youthful looks won't last forever. Make the most of it. Just don't allow people to patronise you because they assume you are a child. Make it bloody obvious you are an educated woman and take no shit from anyone.

I was the same till I started getting greys!

People think you're lucky to look young but it can be a pain esp when in certain offices I worked in younger people than I thought I was younger than them, and expected me to be the one making tea! Even though I was a manager! People younger than you can really patronise you that's the worst.

@Prettybluepigeons

Thoughts and prayers.

I have a friend who sometimes goes through what u do. She got married at 28 and was told by someone "oooh aren't u a bit young to be married?" Ffs!

I’ve just turned 30 but I was ID recently when buying alcohol. I’ve got a baby face, but I also think that my dress sense and body language (I’m naturally quite shy/timid) add to the problem. But I’ve no idea how to dress or act any differently. I’ve started going clothes shopping and trying to think “would X (30yr old friend) wear this?” but I leave the shop empty handed.

It's the same for me , once I was even I'D in Sainsbury's and the cashier said grey hair didn't make a difference because it's genetic and she held my license for ages I'm in my 30s
At parents evening I've been mistaken for the older sister, I've even been chatted up by teenagers .
I had an ex who hated it encouraged me to cut my hair as he didn't want to come across a man with a child(to put politely). Cutting my hair made a little difference however longer hair is easier to style quickly and low maintenance.

Would you rather look ten years older than your age or ten years younger? I know my answer

Oh my god you are me!

I am shorter than you although mid 30s now. Weigh more than you though after lockdown!!

@Freckleyou20 I remember those days when I was way older than a child for the children's menu and they used to say things like that - or a balloon. Used to really piss me off. And of course my younger sister looked and looks older than me

Have you considered seeing an image consultant?

They would help you to project a more mature image through hair, make up, posture and clothing choice.

If your voice is a problem, you could also see a voice coach.

My sister had this issue until she was 30. I on the other hand looked middle aged at twelve.

@JuliaVerammm

Also I just find people can be so rude. I was sitting in a theatre with a year 1 class I had been teaching for a while. One of the TAs from another class asked the staff if they wanted a cup of tea. I said yes. When she came back she said out loud "who is the cup of tea for??" And the male teacher said me, and she said "oh I thought she was one of the children!"

Bear in mind it was only year 1 there and no way do I look like a 5 year old.

Oh my god seriously that is just incredibly rude! I think I would have been absolutely seething! Would not have taken kindly to her!

When I was working in a nursery on the same site as a primary school I wore them uniform black trousers and white t-shirt. I walked off the site to go home for dinner one day and the caretaker called me - it was because he thought I read one of the pupils. It took him a few minutes but he realised I wasn't. Fucks sake

When I was young it really pissed me off and used to get so angry. (And yes the patronising and all things mentioned above). When I got older I laughed it off.
Still annoying for the whole not taking you seriously and looking younger etc etc but it doesn't get me down or angry. And if I ever get patronised because of it now I'll give it back as good as I get.

There are so many comments and things I could say though. One man in Costco when they were giving out free things and I went to take one slapped my hand away and I can't remember what he said but he was treating me like a child. I was mid/late 20s then.

Someone else said how's school going? I said well I left school over 10 years ago so you know! (, This was a while ago) in a nice way cos he wasn't patronising but clearly naive to make that comment

I am similar, 5 foot nothing, very baby faced and also supply / teacher though now in my mid 30s.

I use to use it to my advantage, as in my mid to late 20s I could still get on the bus for child's fare, still do childs price at the football and then head straight to the bar for a beer.

But it does affect my confidence, I feel I carry myself young, feel people treat me as though I am early 20. Though my school friends all look young to me, though other mid 30 year olds I'm like they look their age, as in adult!

Always tell people appearances can be deceiving. No idea why the don't already know this

@Burnthurst187

Would you rather look ten years older than your age or ten years younger? I know my answer

Do you even have a career? As being told you look too young can lead to you not being taken seriously in the workplace, getting patronised, being shunted for promotion etc. Think becoming the “tea girl” as a pp mentioned. If you’re actually in that situation, feeling “blessed” to look young would be the last thing on your mind. It can work against you; I think most younger adults would rather look their age instead of 10 years younger.