If you are overweight, what, in your opinion, made you that way?

[SistemaAddict]

There's been lots of threads recently about weight inspired by the government trying to crack down on obesity yet encouraging us to eat out and posters bemoaning the lockdown lard/pandemic pounds. There has been lots of discussion about the causes of obesity or being overweight due to societal and financial factors but I wanted to ask what posters think made them either overweight or obese because reasons will vary. Certain medications and conditions can cause weight gain and/or make it harder to lose weight and the peri-menopause/menopause doesn't help.

I stopped breastfeeding a year ago and my appetite didn't return to normal after stopping so I gained weight. Then my asthma was bad from October onwards and my ability to go on bike rides was limited. Then lockdown and shielding and my 5 mile school hike up and down big hills went out of the window and I ate too many biscuits and chocolate and would eat in the evening while reading or watching tv. I gained around a stone and that took me into the overweight category.

In June I decided enough was enough and started 16:8 and limited myself to around 1250 calories a day. I bought a fitbit and started using my fitness pal. Both encouraged me to go on walks with the dc and to take more trips up and down the stairs than were necessary to meet my target of 25 flights a day. I stopped eating after dinner, watched my portion sizes and cut out most of the junk I was eating. I'm now a normal weight with a BMI of 24. I'm carrying on with my healthier lifestyle and improved habits but it's hard especially in the evenings when I want chocolate. My aim is to get to a BMI of 23 as that is where I look and feel best.

I don't want this to be a judgemental thread, or for anyone to fat shame posters, I just wanted to share my own reasons for weight gain and ask others' experiences because it's a very individual thing beyond "too many calories in vs calories out" and it can be very complex.

I like food and sitting down

I like food and don't like exercise!

Medication change after being raped by someone I thought was a friend. Combined with hitting my 30s. Long commutes to sedantry office jobs and at least initially, being pleased that being a bit bigger meant I got harrassed less on the street.

Now I need to badly lose the weight and am struggling.

I just love eating.
I am greedy.
I was a chubby child and as an adult, have yoyoed between 9 stone and 20 stone. At the moment I am at a healthy weight for my height with a BMI of 23. But I think about food a lot. I don't fantasise about shagging Idris Elba or winning the Lottery. I fantasise about eating chocolate.

@dontdisturbmenow sadly I've tried all the ones I'm 'allowed' to try. (Other issues with vital organs means I can't try many of them... though, Ironically, its the meds that gave me those issues in the first place!) Quetiapine is the only one I'm allowed on that staves off suicide and lessens the psychosis to a reasonable degree. Its a high weight gain drug for most. Its a balancing act. Alive, but fat, or slightly less fat and probably soon dead?

I'm too lazy to fight anymore so I guess laziness is why I'm fat after all!

Mostly comfort eating which turned into a binge eating disorder following being abused as a child (and being told how pretty I was and me wanting to stop it and hide, because as children we know one of the worst things to be is fat...) Then I had a breakdown in my mid 20's and the binge eating plus citalopram meant I gained a lot (I'm talking 4-5 stone) in a year and have been struggling to lose it ever since.
Being addicted to food is hard. It's devastating and exhausting. You don't need to take drugs/alcohol and you can not be around the such. You need food to live and there's no escape from it.

@LadyOfTheImprovisedBath

I've been doing 16:8 too managed to lose 12kg but have another 10kg to go

I've been wondering what 16:8 is - as I've had limited success with 5:2 - though tend to get blown of it usually by a bad day or week in past few years.

So I looked and bar the occasional odd day it's how I eat anyway - can't think of many days I'm not eating ie fasting for 17 hours out of 24.

I'm usually eating two meals a day - not constantly grazing - so will have to start looking a calories and portion sizes again.

I have exactly the same bafflement as you! 12kg is a massive amount to lose just by giving up breakfast and evening snacks .

19 days out of 20 I eat at 1pm and 8pm and that's it, that is my normal woe. WTF can't I lose 12kg?

@dontdisturbmenow some antidepressants and other meds make you pack on the weight. I’ve been on a certain brand of antidepressants in the past and I piled on almost 3 stone in 6 months, I dieted eating 1000 cals a day and exercised, all that happened is my weight plateaued. When I stopped them the weight dropped off without me dieting. If you google antidepressants and weight gain you will see thousands of people’s experiences. I can well believe the pp is surviving on 800 cals a day and not losing,

Depression, anxiety, arthritis, steroids, emotional eating,

Not sure if that is the correct order, all happened around the same time, all come down to a traumatic event a few years ago but it was bubbling below the surface before this!!!

(my type of arthritis is autoimmune and triggered by stress, but would have reared its head at some point regardless)

I ate too much. No medical issues: just portions that were (a) too big and (b) too frequent.

I lost the six stones of excess fat in my late 40s and, despite assertions on here to the contrary, my 'diet' did work and I am maintaining my ideal weight

Constantly being on a diet since puberty is what made me fat. Thanks Mum! This has been interspersed with periods of not being fat when I’d finished dieting before I got fat again and started another one.

I’m not fat now (although I don’t think I ever really stopped thinking of myself in that way tbh) and have maintained a fairly constant weight for the past 7 years by teaching myself how to eat enough and not demonising certain foods and counting calories, to enjoy exercise (find one you love, there will be something) and to stop spending all of my time planning diets and thinking about how wonderful life would be when I was thin.

A mix of things, fibromyalgia and PCOS being big contributors and the start of it all.
But, if I was to put a pinpoint on it, it would have been falling into a deep, deep depression after losing my baby. This landed me with binge eating disorder which 2.5 years later I haven't even began recovering from. It's miserable!

Mine is alcohol . I drink to much wine ( empty calories) then I don’t want to excercise and make poor food choices .

@Summersnearlyover, I know that, which is why I asked Babydubs about other drugs

As you say Babydubs, sometimes you have to make a choice and being alive is clearly more important than being slim.

Hopefully you'll get better and able to come off the drug and the weight will fall off then.

I never had an issue with weight when I was younger but I had a child late in life and couldn't lose all the weight I had gained then the menopause hit and at 52 I am finding it harder and harder to lose any weight. Gained 1½ stone during lockdown and this has been mainly caused by far too much alcohol and no exercise. I am currently working on changing my lifestyle as I have lots of nice clothes that no longer fit and I can't wear my lovely rings any more as my fingers are too fat.

Oh yeah, and being starved as a child and 'rebelling' by sneaking food. That's probably how it really all started!

Eating and drinking too much, not exercising.

However you dress it up in the majority of people this is the issue.

Even eating out, that's not the cause if your diet is otherwise balanced.

Autoimmune illness triggered during/after childbirth was the start, doctors not taking me seriously for years (You're supposed to be tired you silly, you've got a baby/toddler!"), then exhaustion caused bad eating habits. When you don't have enough energy to stand at the sink and wash up, you're not going to have the energy to cook. When you need to lie down and rest after walking downstairs you're not going to have the energy to work out. Energy drinks and sugary food were a godsend when I was facing the daunting daily task of the 15 minute school run...

My illness is controlled now, after I did a lot of my own research, but I'm still struggling to break some of the bad habits I formed over 7+ years. I went from a size 10 to a 24, currently I'm a dress size 18 and working on it.

Sexually assaulted numerous times so my weight makes me feel safer and not so much of a target to the male haze and I self sabotage when I feel I have lost too much weight and am entering the normal weight and becoming more conventionally attractive.

Depression md anxiety means staying in but I'm so happy when I get out and exhausted the next day it takes a few days to do it again.

Comfort eating works better than any AD I have aever taken..

I know what a healthy diet is and cook from scratch. I know how to lose weight. I need help to fix the emotional issues in order to tackle the weight

Motherhood. Meant I was around food constantly and had v limited time (and energy) for exercise. Have noticed even now that when I'm knackered from lack of sleep I eat more to keep going. Opposite of a virtuous spiral.

Wine and lack of moving and then the recovery food of hangovers, all my own doing as was very slim until mid 30s.

@Worried74, mine to and that's really stuck a cord, he did to, feel physically sick now so staying fat.

Genetics at some level - we are a big built family.

I was taught by my mother to reward with food and to comiserate with food. So food is what I go to when both happy and sad.

I wasn't brought up to exercise or have hobbies or play sports, go to the gym, go running or anything else.

A relationship that was built around eating out and drinking that went on for 10 years.

I guess some level of poor self esteem when it comes to how I look. I go out, have plenty of friendships and get on well with work colleagues. I don't believe being fat has been something that has held me back so at some level, I guess I haven't felt the need to change anything.

However, COVID happened and I am now acutely aware of both age and weight putting me in the danger category and it has hit me that unless I start to get a grip, I risk not seeing my children married. So I am getting a grip, albeit slowly.

Combination of things. Under active thyroid, under active lifestyle, mental health meds, an addiction to cheese, comfort eating, misery eating, too much alcohol, no willpower.

Not really sure. I've always had a big appetite, bigger then those around me. Always want to end a meal very full. My family are big foodies anyway but it's never been junk food. I'm an excellent cook and have fairly high end tastes.

Ultimately i think it's sugar addiction. When I keto, all the cravings go, I kind of stabilise hormonal and my appetite reduces to the point that I forget to eat occasionally.

I'm currently losing weight from my highest point after dc2 was born in the winter. Started at over 15st currently hovering at about 13 with 2 more to go.

My technique is a combo of keto and controlling portion size, including swapping one meal a day with soup or similar light fair.

Living with my grandparents while my mum worked. My nan had a rule that if it was edible, you could eat it. No one had to ask.

My nan was an amazing self regulator, and says after having 4 kids, 4 grandkids and 4 great grandkids that she never has time to sit and eat, which is great but when you are a kid with not much to do, and a permanantly stocked fridge at your disposal you develop unhealthy eating habits.

When I did lose weight, every one told me I looked sick, or I was losing too much weight too quickly and it destroyed my confidence, so I started overeating again for comfort.

Now I'm losing weight again but the damage is already done.