About organ donation?

[hauntedvagina]

It's come to light recently that I have several family members who would not want to donate their organs when they die. However they would accept a donor organ if their life depended on it.

I'm a firm believer in organ donation, once I'm gone the doctors can help themselves to whatever they need. However I also believe that if you're not prepared to give, you shouldn't expect to receive. AIBU here?

@InDeoEstMeaFiducia

So why not scrap it and save the money ? (As I suggested previously ...)

You think scrapping the registry we have now and creating another one is going to save money?!

No, we don't need a registry at all.

We have one. It means nothing. Therefore it's useless and can go. Let's just ask the relatives and be done with it.

Or we actually pay attention to what the register says in every case, and people can sign up in the knowledge that their last act on this planet, on this plane, in this phase of our existence, has been to help others with no interference.

Yes, I really am that thick.

The key here is the family’s wishes. Fact is that family are far more likely to agree to donate a loved one’s organs if they’ve already had the conversation and discussed their wishes in advance. But reality is that most people never consciously have that conversation, and then when the person dies suddenly and is eligible to donate their organs the family don’t know what the wishes of the deceased person are and so they are left to make the decision for themselves.

Around 48% of families whose loved one is on the register refuse to donate their organs if they didn’t have knowledge of the fact. That number drops to about 20% if the wishes of the deceased were already known.

So what people need to do is to speak to their families and make their wishes clear.

Also, if you believe your family would say know you can take out an advance directive to ensure your wishes are carried out, but presumably you’d only do that if you believed your family would say no and you felt strongly about it.

For those who say that those who wouldn’t donate shouldn’t be allowed to receive, how can you say that and then call it a gift in the same sentence? Either it’s a gift or it’s an obligation.

Bearing in mind that you are far more likely to need an organ than to be in a position to donate one. Most people who die are not eligible to donate their organs, you have to die in very specific circumstances for that. With that in mind, saying that you shouldn’t receive if you wouldn’t give is based on a hypothetical. What you’re essentially saying is if someone needs an organ right now and they wouldn’t have agreed to donate their organs in the unlikely event of their death in such circumstances as to make them retrievable, then why shouldn’t be allowed to receive the treatment they need now even though the likelihood of them ever being in a position to donate their organs is tiny.

And lastly, I need a heart transplant. I’m lucky in that I’m not on that list yet, but I also know it’s only a matter of time, was told a year by the consultant last October, I’m hopefully going to beat those odds but you just never know. But if when I am in a position to receive a new heart, there is absolutely no way I would be comfortable with the fact that organ was considered the property of the state, and essentially mine for the taking. A heart is a gift, and it comes with an attachment. As I receive a new heart, so someone will lose a loved one. There is a price to pay for receiving an organ, hence why it’s a gift and not an expectation.

"The vast majority of us will not be in the position to donate anyway."

That's also true.

The key here is the family’s wishes

I disagree and there isn't much middle ground. Whose organs are they anyway ?

I disagree and there isn't much middle ground. Whose organs are they anyway ? but the key is the family’s wishes. It doesn’t matter whether you sign up to the donor register, whether you tell the world you want your organs donated, if the family say no then it doesn’t happen.

Which is why it’s so important to make your wishes clear to them so they’re not suddenly faced with the question of “did you ever discuss organ donation?” And having to make the decision without your input.

but the key is the family’s wishes.

Not it's not ! It's mine

Honestly, the discrimination the dead face is disgusting. You'll be dead one day.

@ DGRossetti it should be yours, but ultimately it is your family who have to consent.

And if someone isn’t a registered donor then what? If they just hadn’t got round to registering? Equally if someone just hadn’t got round to opting out... there is actually very little evidence that opt out makes any difference to the numbers of donation, and the rise in countries where donations is higher is all down to education and communication with the family.

you say how the dead is treated is disgusting but that works both ways. No, in theory the family should not be allowed to override someone’s express wishes, assuming they have made those clear. But equally your body should not become the property of the state just because you didn’t get round to opting out.

You can still sign up to the organ donor register FWIW.

@DGRossetti

but the key is the family’s wishes.

Not it's not ! It's mine

Honestly, the discrimination the dead face is disgusting. You'll be dead one day.

God, yes, the presumption that everyone's body belongs to the state to do as they please with once they are dead, that's what presumed consent is. That's part of why there was the baby ashes scandal, the removal of stillborn and neonatally dead babies' organs and other such great injustices. It matters, even in death, which is why desecrating human remains/violation of a sepulchre and necrophilia are crimes and there are rules and by-laws regarding the disposable of human remains.

I do think its selfish to be willing to take an organ but not willing to give, having said that i wouldn't base who got an organ on someones beliefs.

I've carried a donor card since i was about 13 and im more than happy for the doctors to use whatever they can.

I was a altruistic kidney donor a year ago.
I don't know who got my kidney, all I know if my kidney is doing well in the recipient ... and thats all that I need to know, im happy with that.
People have asked why would i donate esp to a stranger.... it was just sometimes I wanted to do so i did it.
Its nice to know ive helped someone.

It was made clear to me that if some time down the line I need a kidney myself, I would not be given any preferential treatment and wouldn't go to the top of the list or go before someone else who needed a kidney more than I did.
Again I was fine with that.

If i could donate again i would. It wasn't painful, I was out of hospital 2 days later and back to work 6 weeks later.... i couldve gone back earlier but the hospital recommended I take 6 weeks as I have a manual job.

@bluebluezoo

I decided against after I saw the documentary about the "brain dead" danish teenager who they were going to harvest organs from, and then she woke up! I'm not convinced that they actually know when you're dead. It also seems that death is a process, so our methods of detecting death could be lacking

Which documentary was this? Generally there are several separate, independent testing processes to determine brain death, so it’s all but unheard of. I’d like to watch and see what the story was.

I don't remember the name of the documentary but her name is Carina Melchior. Should be easy to look up.

I'm not sure if I saw it in english though.... I'm multilingual.

Thing is it’s all very well to say that someone who wouldn’t donate shouldn’t be allowed to receive, but it’s hypothetical isn’t it? People are saying that from behind their keyboards, not from the position of being on the receiving end of the decision.

Let’s say for instance that your now adult child doesn’t believe in organ donation. Doesn’t matter why that is, it’s their prerogative to not be on the donor list. And then they are taken seriously ill and you are told that their only chance of long-term survival will be an organ transplant, except they’re not on the donor register and as such they’ll be sent home to die as they’re not eligible on the basis of someone else’s moral judgement. You really think you would just be able to shrug that off and say “well, serves you right, you should have offered to be a donor, even if that meant you would likely never have donated it doesn’t matter..”

People have asked why would i donate esp to a stranger.... it was just sometimes I wanted to do so i did it.

I admire you for doing it but I wouldn’t donate my kidney to a stranger. I will be keeping mine until death just in case someone in my family needs it and we are compatible.

I agree with @DGRossetti that my organs belong to me, not some family member who disagrees with my carefully thought out decisions

I disagree with family members being able to change my Yes to a No
just as much as if the state could turn a No into a Yes

My body, my choice

However, one of the few advantages of having no close family, is that my choice would be respected - my card which I always carry states that I have no next of kin

On moral grounds, personally I would neither give nor receive an organ in a "live" donation

• I would feel absolutely dreadful if either the organ failed quickly, or the health of the donor suffered

and I am not sufficiently generous to risk my own health to donate while alive either.

I would be happy to donate organs after my death, however I have opted out of the donation scheme as I believe that the government should not have the right to take an organ if they so wish. If my family wish for it when I die, then that is fine.

@Iknowthingsthatwillhappen

I would be happy to donate organs after my death, however I have opted out of the donation scheme as I believe that the government should not have the right to take an organ if they so wish. If my family wish for it when I die, then that is fine.

It’s not the government taking it though. The medical professionals take it and give it to someone who needs it to stay alive or have a better quality of life.

You are missing my point, I do not wish to sign away my body in advance, my relatives can do so if they wish. It will start to get into Big Brother territory if we allow automatic organ donation.