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Original poster

To think colleague is not too old to have a baby

125 replies

thedaywewillremeber · 14/08/2020 23:39

My colleague at work has just told us all she’s 14 weeks pregnant. I’m very happy for her however another colleague mentioned today not to her but to me that she’s a bit to old to be having a baby. She’s 33 which I think is within the normal age range.

OP posts:
Pinkbunny2811 · 15/08/2020 07:45

If she's too old, does he have kids already them? Some people need to keep their opinions to themselves

GETTINGLIKEMYMOTHER · 15/08/2020 07:49

He’s just a clueless, thoughtless young idiot.

TitsOutForHarambe · 15/08/2020 07:50

If she is having a baby then she clearly isn't too old to be having a baby. This one is pretty open and shut.

lifesalongsong · 15/08/2020 07:52

Where about are you that you even need to ask the question? Your co worker is a youngish man he probably has no clue about what age women have children but I'm quite surprised that you don't know that it's a perfectly normal age.

formerbabe · 15/08/2020 07:54

At the risk of a flaming, is he from a very working class background or poorly educated? The only people I've encountered who think like this are either old or from the background I've got described.

Yes, I know not everyone in that demographic thinks like that before anyone says anything

formerbabe · 15/08/2020 07:55

*just not got

AnotherEmma · 15/08/2020 07:57

How many children does he have, then?
Since he's in his late 20s he must have them already before he and his partner get "too old".

Oh wait.... is he single and childless by any chance?!

WingingIt101 · 15/08/2020 08:03

I had my first baby at 32 and turned 33 3 months later.
Your colleague who made the comment is a bloody idiot, and frankly even if the pregnant colleague were much much older it would still be rude of him to comment, judgemental and none of his business!
I’d have had to say something to him but then I’m a pain like that!

PrincessBuggerPants · 15/08/2020 08:04

There is a woman on the 'lesbian who doesn't understand why there are accidental pregnancies' thread who said she thought she wouldn't still be able to get pregnant at 34. Hmm

springiscoming12 · 15/08/2020 08:06

Absolutely the right age to have a baby. Your colleague doesn’t know what he’s talking about

Durgasarrow · 15/08/2020 08:12

33 is normal

SurreyHillsGirl · 15/08/2020 08:16

33? Don’t be daft Grin

lanthanum · 15/08/2020 08:21

My mum was officially labelled as an older mum when she had my brother (number 4) at 32. She asked me if I was labelled similarly (at 35). My midwife laughed at the very idea - 35 was pretty much average around here at the time.
It has varied over time, and also between areas - my mum was actually much the oldest in the nursing home when I was born, at 24. Then we moved areas, and she was younger than most other mums of my yeargroup.

Of course your colleague may also have mis-estimated her age!

Liverbird77 · 15/08/2020 08:22

I just had one at 43 soooo...

Icantrememebrtheartist · 15/08/2020 08:22

I’m sure your colleague would be pleased you “approve” and think her pregnancy is acceptable at her age.

Your other colleague is being a bitch and embodies behaviour I hate in office life.

Why can’t you all do the normal thing and say “congratulations” and be happy for her and stop gossiping about her?

And of course 38 isn’t too old! In London/Surrey it seems to be around the average age for a first or maybe second baby.

Icantrememebrtheartist · 15/08/2020 08:26

Oops I should’ve put my glasses 😊 33 would be considered you fish where I live!

Icantrememebrtheartist · 15/08/2020 08:27

Youngish! What is happening this morning!! 😀

The80sweregreat · 15/08/2020 08:28

Blimey, I was 32 when I had ds2 so positively ancient then 😀
Your colleague is how old? About 18?
I guess when your very young 33 or 34 is seen as 'old ' but it really isn't! My own mum was nearly 40 when she had me in the 1960s. Raised a few eyebrows, but it's more common these days than it was back then and much safer too with scans and more blood tests and so on.

Rewis · 15/08/2020 08:28

One of my colleagues thought it was a good idea to share her option "I don't understand why anyone over the age if 25 would have kids. It is so late that you are doing disservice to the child" to a group of childless women over the age of 25.

longtimecomin · 15/08/2020 08:32

I thought you were going to say 51! 33 is bang on in the middle of your fertile years 🤷‍♀️

SockYarn · 15/08/2020 08:35

I had similar comments when I was expecting my third at 36.

The two people who commented had mothers who had had them at 16/17 and one of the mothers was a grandparent at 36 and a great grand parent 55.

So to them, the idea of someone having a baby at the age their mother became a granny was ANCIENT.

zigaziga · 15/08/2020 08:36

What?!

That would have made you one of the youngest in my NCT.

AuntLucy · 15/08/2020 08:37

Ha! I am 45 and pregnant. I am, by all usual standards, 'a bit old' to be having a baby. Your colleague is a mere whippersnapper 😁

BeingATwatItsABingThing · 15/08/2020 08:43

@Icantrememebrtheartist

I’m sure your colleague would be pleased you “approve” and think her pregnancy is acceptable at her age.

Your other colleague is being a bitch and embodies behaviour I hate in office life.

Why can’t you all do the normal thing and say “congratulations” and be happy for her and stop gossiping about her?

And of course 38 isn’t too old! In London/Surrey it seems to be around the average age for a first or maybe second baby.

I didn’t read it as the OP was gossiping or giving her approval to her colleague at all. Hmm The male colleague is a twat of course but I get the impression that he stated his opinion to the OP after hearing that the 33yo was pregnant.

If I overheard someone saying something unpleasant about my age in relation to my pregnancy and then another person defended me, I wouldn’t be hacked off that they thought I needed their ‘approval’. I would be happy that they were putting the twat in their place.

YessicaHaircut · 15/08/2020 08:45

The colleague who commented is extremely rude and clueless!
I just had my first baby and I’m 37.