To think colleague is not too old to have a baby

[thedaywewillremeber]

My colleague at work has just told us all she’s 14 weeks pregnant. I’m very happy for her however another colleague mentioned today not to her but to me that she’s a bit to old to be having a baby. She’s 33 which I think is within the normal age range.

Lower than average - although socio-economic factors influence that number. I’d presume that whomever made the ridiculous ‘too old’ comment came from a background where young parents were the norm. Also given that it’s really fucking obvious that it’s a rude and tactless thing to say I’d assume they were a bit of a clueless twat as well.

The MALE colleague clearly knows the ideal age for a woman to have a child. I can't believe He wasn't consulted on the matter before conceiving! what a wanker

So a late 20s male declared a pregnant 33 year old woman ‘too old’ to have a baby? Well doesn’t he sound delightful...
This.
How many babies did this man-child give birth to, before offering such well-informed opinion?

A lot of men who prefer younger women think like this. I have male relatives who married in their 30s to women in their early 20s and saw 29 (woman’s age not theirs) as the cut off for kids. They were all horrified when I announced my pregnancy at 39.

Was your colleague bought up within a remote hunter-gatherer tribe? Of course it’s ok. Lol.

Do you share his views? Why do you ask this question?

Your colleague is a dinosaur! Saying that women had large families many years ago and were having kids well into their 30's and 40's

I had mine at 36 and 40

Your male colleague in his 20s won’t have much luck with women with an attitude like this.

He is wrong. She’s so, so average these days to have a baby. Where I’m from most first babies arrive from 30 - 35. Sure there were a few in the 20s amongst family and friends but in all honesty most unplanned and without fathers who stuck around. I thought you were going to say 43!

@2tired2bewitty

I think the average age of a first time mother in the UK is now 35, so you might argue she’s a bit young.

No it isn’t. Average age of first birth in UK is 28.8. However 33 isn’t old at all.

He just sounds like a young man who is not very experienced or knowledgable about the world yet.

I think he fancies her, and her being pregnant has ruined his little work fantasy so he's bitter and lashing out.

33 is below average for a first child in my peer group:

He’s late 20s? He needs to crack on then or he will surely be too late soon.

Twat.

Whenever any of my male colleagues had an opinion to give on having children, I tended to just glaze over and smile, possibly with the MN Head Tilt. Especially the one who told me I shouldn't have had a c-section with my first.

I had my first at 32 (six weeks before my 33rd birthday) and youngest at 34 (was the day before I was 35!).

Any time in 20-30s is pretty normal these days. Some women chose their 40s as well.
Since men can have babies into their 70s, it's very hypocritical for men of any age to judge women as 'too old' for babies. Also, the only people needed in the decision making on parental age are the parents themselves (although should be strongly discouraged below 17...)

He's an idiot. It's like he's trying to place a value on women as past it byt the time they're 33.

How weird - are you sure he doesn’t think she’s 43? Would still be none of his fucking business obviously. Round here 33 would be young I think.

She’s only 33?! What a tit. I had DD (my second and final child) at 32 and was the youngest mum at lots of groups I went to with her.

How strange - in my social group that would have been young, I would say 75% had their first over 35.

Quite possibly you colleague is:
-not very good at guessing ages and thinks your colleague is 53 instead, which probably is a bit old.
-knows her age but not very good with numbers and doesn't realise there is a difference between 33 and 53 or 73.

• a judgemental and none- to-bright idiot making things up.
• has been told so by other people, Possibly his own mother had him young and has been putting down people who don't have their kids so young in his hearing ever since. MIL got married at 19, so has been making snide comments about woman who can't get married by 25 as being on the shelf for the vast majority of her lifetime. Luckily DH has the sense to recognise nasty nonsense when he heard it. Maybe your colleague doesn't.

Oh, I should add that I haven't given birth so maybe am not entitled to an opinion.

It's a very rude remark for your colleague to make and obviously she's not old at all for motherhood.

Does he possibly think she's older - in her 40's? I had my baby at 40 btw so still don't think this is appropriate.

Not especially relevant but a colleague of mine was pregnant at the same time as me. We were both forty. I possibly look younger (I say possibly because it's impossible to tell if people are giving you false flattery) but not hugely younger. She unfortunately, looks much older than her years - I would have guessed 50's.

She had an awful time in work with people's reactions to her news, bizarre reactions ranging from "is this a joke?" to stunned silence. She was perplexed by it all and asked me was I experiencing the same. I lied and said I was.

When I had my first there were only 2 of us at ante natal class who were younger than 33. Your colleague is indeed a twat!

I'm assuming that he doesn't have kids but expects to find a young early 20s woman to procreate with when the time comes?

Your colleague shouldn’t be commenting on his colleague’s pregnancy at all. (Neither should you, really, but an anonymous thread is a bit different.)

I had my first baby when I was nearly 38, FWIW.

Even my granny was about that age when she married and had my mother - her only child - in 1929. My mother was about 32 when she had me - again first child. This is one reason this family owns a house etc - we marry, have two professional salaries, work full time, buy a property and only then have a child.