To be pissed with messages after nightshift

[Alwaysoutofreach]

I have just finished night 4 of 6 nightshifts,
I am an absolute mess, im getting max 3hrs sleep a day, im SE London, its been absolutely scorching since Thursday last week 30s+, hard enough to sleep in at night, let alone during the day, with the added noise of daily life and people enjoying the weather.

This morning, I had been asleep for maybe an hour, 4hrs after my shift had finished (and I stayed late) and my phone starts going off.

Its my manager, informing me, and my team about a meeting on Thursday just after noon, wanting responses from everyone, so of course, new group, no notifications set up, everyone replying, I'm awake, my phone rarely goes off, my family know when im at work, and I woke in a panic that something had happened and now, im sat here, my rooms absolutely baking, 2 ceiling fans going, windows open wide, curtains open for the light breeze, door open, sleep is not happening, I could fry an egg in here!!

Im furious, the more I sit here not sleeping, the more annoyed I get.

Not only because my manager has woken me up (gr?) but also that I now have to try and be present for a meeting after day 6 of nightshift 7hrs after my shift finishes.

I want to message her back (privately away from the group) to make a point of this, it isn't the first time, and frankly, I've had enough, im sleep deprived, hot and bothered, and feeling stupidly fragile, but all my messages are sounding PA or rude.

Any magic sleeping in heatwave recipes? 😭

[Alwaysoutofreach]

Oh, and to add, DH cheered me up no end.

Had a shower, to get ready for bed, I heard music a short while later, DH had suspended a small speaker up to outside the bathroom window, playing lovely music.

All ia right in my crazy little world again

[Alwaysoutofreach]

I dont hate my job, or my wages, and never implied that either.

In a moment after being woken up, I was frustrated, I work nights so I can be around for my dc, school, etc. it work's for me and my family.

[expat101]

I understand how you feel, hubby is an x shift worker and he was absolutely drained by night shift 3. Thus chucked it in, there was no quality of life and his private tie was shortened due to getting ready for the up coming day shift. Anyhow you know how that is.... if the change of settings doesn’t work for your phone, how about getting a secondary cheapie model and giving out the number to family only, that way you know who is calling you and turn the off one completely off?

Hubby’s employers were a lot more considerate than yours, but they only had my mobile number and the landline. Sometimes it pays not to be so available to those not close to us personally.

[expat101]

Life not tie ^

[MrsTerryPratchett]

@SurroundedByIdiotsEverywhere

You took the job with shifts... I've also done shifts, one week out of three on nights (11 pm - 8 am Mon - Fri) so I know where you are coming from, we also had meetings once a month but had to be present in the office at 6pm, 5 hours before the shift started, we couldn't call in!

How much do you like your job and wages? If you hate it that much try for another without shifts, but there will be plenty of people who will take your place, especially now!

God people are unsympathetic.

If all the night workers decided to work days, who would do the incredibly important work?

I personally saved lives on night shifts. It was a fucking nightmare with bosses scheduling meetings for the day staff (them) not the night staff (us). Wankers.

[Alwaysoutofreach]

I know I wasn't going to reply, but @MrsTerryPratchett the them and us is so real ansld ao frustrating!!

[jigglybits]

I just want to say, you have every right to be cranky as you're barely getting any sleep.
But 9-5 people will contact you during the day.
I hope you managed to get some sleep, and can use some of the suggestions about settings for the future. 💐

[Alwaysoutofreach]

*and so frustrating

[214]

YANBU, I feel your pain but that is because I and my DH have worked nights, your Manager probably hasn't or isn't so won't understand the problem. Nights have their plus points for sure but very hard in hot weather (also hard in cold Winters when all you see Is the dark!) Good luck with the rest of your set.

[margarita7]

Put your phone on DND and set favourites. That way it only rings if it's important people/emergency

[Happymedium31]

Fellow night shift worker here too!
Go to pharmacy and ask for promethezine. Explain you work night shifts and are struggling to sleep during the day.
Take one, turn your phone to do not Disturb and sleep like a baby.

[Barney60]

half fill a hot water bottle with cold water put in freezer with an eye mask. after an hour or 2 remove close curtains put an electric fan on some relaxing music sound of sea or something, turn phone off. Do some deep breathing , hopefully will help . hope you get some shut eye.

[Mir91]

Don't think you're being unreasonable. Tip for staying cool, saw it on This morning, basin of ice in front of a fan (preferably as near to you as possible) might help. Try lavender oil. I got a roll on version of it in Homestore and More. Hopefully something works for you

[Wavescrashingonthebeach]

Do people really cut all contact from the world when they sleep?
Im quite shocked how many completely switch off to sleep.

That is the entire point of sleep and if you refuse to accept that and allow controllable things to continue to affect your sleep your health will suffer. The only thing that should be allowed to wake you is someone hammering at your front door with, god forbid, a legitimate emergency.

saying all this while knowing i should be napping right now as have to pick DP up from work later & dog will have me up at crack of dawn

[helpIhateclothesshopping]

Cms1972
my SIL got round being woken up for parcels etc. by printing a sign and sticking it by her front door something along the lines of "Essential NHS night shift worker, I am sleeping at the moment please do not disturb so that I can perform my job better" Maybe that's also worth a try.

[RenoSusan]

Wet a large towel with cold water and point a fan at the bed. Put towel over you from neck to toes after turning on fan. That's my best solution.

[fatchilli123]

I put frozen bottles of water in front of my fan . The air coming off that is wonderful compared to just a fan . Not perfect solution but it is nice.

[Catastrophejane]

OP - as a former night shift worker, I completely feel your pain. Summers in London used to be horrendous.

YANBU to expect your line manager or be aware that you have worked 5 night shifts ( in my job, you weren’t allowed to do 4 in a row because it was so exhausting). I would never contact a colleague who’d been on night shift until a decent hour ...and my colleagues were also mindful of it.

The posters saying switch your phone off have obviously never worked a night shift - emergencies do happen during the day.

I’d get some proper sleep, then broach it with your manager. This meeting could have been arranged the night before. Maybe a constructive chat to avoid this happening in future? ( but in my old job, you weren’t allowed to be called in less than 12 hours after your last night.)

It’ll all feel better after some sleep

[Catastrophejane]

This is great advice for someone working normal hours, but the list of ‘controllable factors’ on a night shift are very different...

It’s impossible to sleep properly in daylight...and the whole point is it’s more difficult to control your environment- have you ever tried to ask someone to stop cutting their grass at 2pm? At 2am, it’s much easier to ‘control’

The point is, OP’s employer is one of the few people who knew she was asleep. They shouldn’t be texting someone on a night shift at a time they’re likely to be asleep.

[Wavescrashingonthebeach]

@Catastrophejane

Exactly, thats entirely my point, when your on nights the amount of things that can disturb you can be out of your control. Thats why you maximise your chances by doing things you can control, like putting your phone on DND with any necessary caveats / exceptions.

We use an OOH rota at work and we work on the assumption that if they are not on call, the work phone will be off

[jillybeanclevertips]

It would seem that by public opinion you should have your phone OFF completely. Let your manager know that, and then there will be no surprises when you don't turn up, which you shouldn't have to anyway due to your shifts, Its no good you getting in a tizzy because you left your phone on, vibrate or not, it was still ON. If you act reasonably, then you can expect it from others.

[deifersmum]

Ok, I learnt this trick while living in Germany, first of all Close your window and curtains during the day in the whole house, when the sun goes down then open the windows, curtain etc to get the coolish night air in. I know it sound mads but think of a cave, they are away cool right.

Secondly, I'd privately call your boss, explain your lack of sleep isnt helping you do your job and leave it at that, if they want a good, efficient workforce they have to plan better, the banks then in their court. Have you tried camomile and honey tea before bed, works a treat for me. Good luck. Xx

[vixxo]

My phone is always on silent with notifications disabled unless I'm waiting for a call. Certainly you should do that before going to sleep.

[kat83enzo]

Tbh if you don't like it then work days. Your manager can't work around every member of staffs individual requirements...unreasonable. your manager I doubt works nights... Seems like neither of you is considering the other. The world doesn't stop turning just cause you want it too....

[Loubymoo27]

YABU! You cannot complain when you have your phone set to vibrate!!! If you don't want waking up put it in silent! It's very simple!

Did you expect your manager to wait until you've had enough sleep before they messaged everyone??