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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

AIBU to give my neighbours living room and kitchen a quick clean.

461 replies

Casschops · 11/08/2020 10:51

My lovely neighbours have gone away on their holidays they don't have much money although work reaaaaally hard and juggle their childcare of their 10 year old son. They have gone to stay in annex of their relations home so have an absolute minmum on their holiday, a friend even drove them their as they struggle with money so much. Im feeding their cat. I saw the man chucking their vacum cleaner in the bin the other week and he was laughing saying they can't afford a new one ATM. The cat has been sick on the floor and flicked cat litter everywhere which I have cleaned up but I can tell that for some weeks they have swept the carpet and floor and there is a thin layer of cat hair and bits in corner of the rooms. It lools like it needs a good vacum the cat has also been walking on woŕktops in the kitchen and there are footprints on things generally lookin a bit hairy and in need of a good wipe as are the windowledges where he sits.
Would they think it odd if I gave everything a wipe down in kitchen and living room as well as mopped the kitchen floor and vacuumed the carpet. I just want them to come home to a nice fresh house or is this intrusive? I am absolutely not looking for people's judgement about levels of tidiness but would it be nice to give things a quick once over or just too much? We say hi on the street and chat but have never socialized with them just to give an idea of our relationship.
Thanks for any input.

OP posts:
latticechaos · 11/08/2020 14:04

Someone did this for me once and I found it a massive boundary overstep.

It wasn't the whole house just the cooker, was going to do it myself later.

Some people (like me Smile) don't welcome interference. I never had her back in my house!

itsgettingweird · 11/08/2020 14:06

@latticechaos

Someone did this for me once and I found it a massive boundary overstep.

It wasn't the whole house just the cooker, was going to do it myself later.

Some people (like me Smile) don't welcome interference. I never had her back in my house!

Send your friend around to do my oven.

I promise not to complain Grin

TheDinnerWitch · 11/08/2020 14:13

I see you're getting a lot of responses OP, very mixed opinions. Just wanted to add mine: I would love it if someone did this for me! ☺️ It would seem really thoughtful and take away some of the stress of 'holiday come-down' (unpacking, washing etc).

Tumbleweed101 · 11/08/2020 14:13

I’d be really happy if my hoover had broken and was dreading coming home to all the mess that needed sorting.

A hoover and mop and wipe over would be fine. I wouldn’t start sorting or throwing things out though!

I often wish someone would help me out!

latticechaos · 11/08/2020 14:16

@itsgettingweird

She probably would too!

I must just look useless, people do it quite a lot to me. Someone mowed my grass. Someone dug my garden.

I'm not even very slatternly. Maybe I just moan a lot.

Anyway, none of them got any thanks Grin just a glare. No repeat attempts!

Popsicales · 11/08/2020 14:17

There’s absolutely no problem with doing this at all. Just run the hoover round downstairs and send them a text joking about the cat kicking litter everywhere so you’ve give it a quick once round. It’s not over stepping the mark if you’re there to look after the cat and clean out it’s litter tray, cleaning bits of kicked about litter is part of looking after a cat!

Wipe down the sides, you’ve said the kitchen was clean anyway when they left so they probably won’t notice you’ve done this.

AlwaysLatte · 11/08/2020 14:19

@Rossita she's feeding their cat 🙄

Loubilou09 · 11/08/2020 14:21

[quote AlwaysLatte]@Rossita she's feeding their cat 🙄[/quote]
And 20 people have already told her so you also needed to read the thread!!!

AlwaysLatte · 11/08/2020 14:21

I would, because hoovering is part of looking after a cat. And you wouldn't want to prepare the cat food on a muddy surface. And because I just wouldn't be able to leave a hairy carpet!!!

CrotchetyQuaver · 11/08/2020 14:23

i'd do it and either not say anything or just something like i had a quick hoover round before you came back as i know your ones broken, i hope that was ok? i can't see why it wouldn't be TBH. going through other people's stuff and chucking some of it away is completely different.

AlwaysLatte · 11/08/2020 14:24

Of course it could have been the cat...

AIBU to give my neighbours living room and kitchen a quick clean.
FrankieChips · 11/08/2020 14:27

Do it and say the cat made a mess that had to be cleaned up.

AlwaysLatte · 11/08/2020 14:27

@Loubilou09 Thank you, do stay around - I'm sure you can be very helpful to the next 20.

WaxOnFeckOff · 11/08/2020 14:29

well, they wont know that you've cleaned the footprints etc as they aren't there to see they've been made so you are okay to clean those I think.

Otherwise i'd do a hoover but keep it casual, as PPs have said, Cat made a mess, remembered you didn't have a hoover so just gave it a quick going over.

1forAll74 · 11/08/2020 14:32

I would just tidy and buff up things in the kitchen area or where the cat eats etc. Cat people will always know there will be cat hairs left unnoticed, and footprints all over the place, so you can just leave things tidy before they come home again. Not that you have to leave things tidy, but this is generally what people seem to do after cat feeding.

Loubilou09 · 11/08/2020 14:32

[quote AlwaysLatte]@Loubilou09 Thank you, do stay around - I'm sure you can be very helpful to the next 20. [/quote]
Will do

I'll add a passive aggressive eye roll too Hmm

yourestandingonmyneck · 11/08/2020 14:39

I think it would be very kind. And as most of the mess is cat related (cat litter, cat fur etc) I don't think it would be overstepping boundaries.

PatriciaPerch · 11/08/2020 14:43

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

supersop60 · 11/08/2020 14:48

@Matildatoldsuchdreadfullies

Tell them that somehow the cat vomit got everywhere, so you’re terribly sorry, but you had to give the house a bit of a clean. Near enough to the truth to be believable.
Exactly this.
Survivingchipandkippee · 11/08/2020 14:50

I think it’s a kind gesture and if you limit it to the areas the cat has impacted and would be ok.

Some suggested offering your hoover when then return, I wouldn’t as then they may think your implying home is dirty and they may be embarrass ed

Toothsil · 11/08/2020 14:55

When I was in hospital having our very premature baby, our neighbour and 2 friends (age 60s and late 70s) cleaned our house from top to bottom, including washing the couch and chair covers and did all the washing and ironing. It's something I would expect to find intrusive, however I really didn't - I was overwhelmed by their kindness and it was so lovely to go home to a fresh and clean house.

Rainb0wDrops · 11/08/2020 14:56

Do it but don't leave a note.
When I last went away I hoovered right before leaving and when we got back the carpet was covered in cat hair and leaves dragged in from the garden.
Would have loved it if my cat feeder had run the hoover round to save me doing it again as soon as I got home. If they had I wouldn't have even noticed as I would have found it just as I left it.

serialreturner · 11/08/2020 14:57

Do it and totally blame the cat sick. Horrible to come home to.

cantstopsinginglittlebabybum · 11/08/2020 14:59

I would clean the place and hoover for them

spiderlight · 11/08/2020 15:00

I would - the cat is the perfect excuse. I did it for a friend a few years back when she had to go away very suddenly (death in family) and her dogs made a mess in the time between her going and us getting there to collect them. It was beyond hoovering - we're talking hiring a Rug Doctor - but I texted her to let her know before she got home and she was very very grateful not to have to come home to a mess.