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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To think schools should not reopen in Sept?

711 replies

SusanFrimp · 09/08/2020 14:15

I think that schools should not fully reopen in September and instead be partially reopened to some years. It is just not safe enough to reopen yet. I'd say December at the latest for full reopening. If they can't reopen other smaller places, how can they reopen schools with 1000's of kids? AIBU?

OP posts:
Mummyoflittledragon · 09/08/2020 16:07

@Orchidsindoors

"My dd did not like homeschooling."

Did it make her mentally ill? It's ok to not like something. We all dislike things, doesnt mean we are suffering mentally.

Had I not been there to get her through all of the school learning, her mental health would have suffered a lot. She was in tears with school work and couldn’t do it by herself. She doesn’t work well alone. She is privileged to be living with a sahp and has access to all the tech she needs. There will be many children with her personality, who do not have the same help.

Additionally I need surgery. Once that happens I won’t be able to help her for months and months. The recovery is very long. If she doesn’t go to school, her mental health will undoubtedly suffer.

Parker231 · 09/08/2020 16:09

I think the majority of children have suffered to some extent due to schools being closed for the majority of children.

They have missed education from trained teachers, daily interactions with their friends, playtime, sports, a daily routine, no exams, missed syllabus towards next years exams. Some have had no education due to receiving no material from their schools, no technology to access online lessons, no access to teachers to explain the work, parents wfm with no free time to help.

The impact won’t properly be known for years.

MumsGoneToIceland · 09/08/2020 16:10

Just out of interest OP, which year groups do you think should go back and which year groups' education and well-being has room to suffer a bit more?

Sockwomble · 09/08/2020 16:10

The OP is speaking from a position of privilege and doesn't understand this.

Mummyoflittledragon · 09/08/2020 16:11

@Orchidsindoors

"This is exactly the problem - many of the children who are struggling aren't privileged enough to be able to 'be online with their friends' as they don't have the technology"

I very strongly disbelieve that. If it is true it will be minuscule numbers. Even in the poorest of households where parents visit food centres, the children all have phones.

A fair proportion of the work dd was set couldn’t be accessed and / or completed over the phone.
Waxonwaxoff0 · 09/08/2020 16:11

My DS has suffered mentally. He is an only child and so much time away from his peers has extremely knocked his confidence. He's a different child to the one he was at the beginning of the year.

jackdawdawn · 09/08/2020 16:13

Can't hide from a virus for months to come. There will be controls and checks. There will be a massive outbreak of colds and coughs in September and it will be very hard and worrying for people, but schools didn't close in WW2 in case a V2 came through the roof, and they shouldn't shut indefinitely now.

SnakesOrLadders · 09/08/2020 16:13

Schools have to go back in sept the damage and time lost already has caused a massive gap academically and socially for a lot of children not all but a lot.
So if you are lucky enough to have been able to teach your dc to a high standard and have not noticed any impact on their mental well-being that’s great but for me and and many others the schools NEED to open.

bg21 · 09/08/2020 16:14

yabu

mbosnz · 09/08/2020 16:15

'Not suffering', is not the same as 'thriving'. Is it a race to the bottom?

My girls have been very stoic and resilient about the whole thing, but I think they're reaching their limits as to what they can take without it beginning to have detrimental impact.

They've been out with friends, but that's not the same as having a normalised, daily, routine of interaction with their peers, their school, and their teachers. It's still quite isolating, you don't get to see all your mates, because some live too great a distance for easy interaction.

IAintentDead · 09/08/2020 16:15

FFS How many more times are people going to ask this question.

Parker231 · 09/08/2020 16:17

We all know school isn’t childcare but if schools don’t open in September the number of redundancies is going to get worse. Employers need their employees back at work. The furlough scheme finishes in October so no further help available.

MoreListeningLessChatting · 09/08/2020 16:19

@MiniCooperLover

This exactly. So many of these threads constantly saying schools cannot go back and plucking a random month from the air and suggesting it will be better then (on this thread the OP suggest December - obviously OP thinks something is occurring in December than isn't in September!)

"This can't be serious ?!? Life HAS to go back to some normality with a sense of being careful. People need to work, bills need to be paid, mortgages need to be paid. In 6 months I know of one person who was very unwell and thankfully recovered. My child needs an education! Stop deliberately taunting."

WonderWebbs · 09/08/2020 16:22

I understand that you have valid reasons for being cautious but with appropriate precautions children need to go back to school asap for educational purposes and also for social reasons.

My DD is going into year 13 and although school have been fantastic through lock down with online lessons she needs the social interaction with her friends. My DD is very level headed normally but she is getting increasingly stressed by the practical part of her A Levels that haven't been covered and the number of lessons she will miss, which is likely as realistically local lock downs will occur over the winter. Throw in the factor that this year group will have to choose university options without actually seeing them, you can only do so much virtually. Not going back to school in September will be a nightmare for key exam years.

Disclaimer: as a family we have abided by all the rules, do know how serious covid-19 is and haven't been flocking to the beach or boarding a flight!

monkeytennis97 · 09/08/2020 16:22

@Toddlerteaplease

Mumsnet seems to be the only place where people aren't sending their kids back to school. Everyone I know can't wait to get them back.
Well as a teacher it's nice to read how important our job is for all the kids' mental health. Trouble is I'm going to be selfish for once in my teaching career... I'm worried about the physical health of DH and I and the mental health of my DCs if anything happens to us. Over 25 years I have given, given, given to other people's kids at the expense of mine countless times, not this time.
Orchidsindoors · 09/08/2020 16:23

",If she doesn’t go to school, her mental health will undoubtedly suffer."

But why do you think that? Ok, in your scenario you have the added worry of the op, but in most cases, why do people jump down the "my kid will be mentally ill" route? Just seems weird to me. I would not expect that of my kids at all and weve been through a lot worse as a family. Why do people not presume their kids will be fine and robust and resourceful? Because they didnt like homeschooling? Diddums. There are lots of things kids might not like, but we have to teach them to be robust, not fall down the "mentally ill" route.

monkeytennis97 · 09/08/2020 16:24

@Orchidsindoors

",If she doesn’t go to school, her mental health will undoubtedly suffer."

But why do you think that? Ok, in your scenario you have the added worry of the op, but in most cases, why do people jump down the "my kid will be mentally ill" route? Just seems weird to me. I would not expect that of my kids at all and weve been through a lot worse as a family. Why do people not presume their kids will be fine and robust and resourceful? Because they didnt like homeschooling? Diddums. There are lots of things kids might not like, but we have to teach them to be robust, not fall down the "mentally ill" route.

Could not agree more.
WonderWebbs · 09/08/2020 16:24

Also to add I agree with everything @mbosnz has said.

Drivingdownthe101 · 09/08/2020 16:24

@Orchidsindoors

",If she doesn’t go to school, her mental health will undoubtedly suffer."

But why do you think that? Ok, in your scenario you have the added worry of the op, but in most cases, why do people jump down the "my kid will be mentally ill" route? Just seems weird to me. I would not expect that of my kids at all and weve been through a lot worse as a family. Why do people not presume their kids will be fine and robust and resourceful? Because they didnt like homeschooling? Diddums. There are lots of things kids might not like, but we have to teach them to be robust, not fall down the "mentally ill" route.

I imagine the ones saying they’re worried for their children’s mental health are the ones who have started to see a decline in their children’s mental health. It’s not rocket science. My kids were fine. Many weren’t.
PollyPelargonium52 · 09/08/2020 16:25

Too many doom and gloom merchants abounding on this forum at the moment.

Orchidsindoors · 09/08/2020 16:25

"She was in tears with school work and couldn’t do it by herself."

Being in tears is ok though? Doesnt mean she is going to be mentally scarred?

MarcelineMissouri · 09/08/2020 16:26

Wow that’s a pretty poor attitude to mental health. My youngest is coping fine, my eldest is not, due to the fact they’re two different children and handle things in different ways.

Orchidsindoors · 09/08/2020 16:27

"imagine the ones saying they’re worried for their children’s mental health are the ones who have started to see a decline in their children’s mental health. It’s not rocket science."

Seems to be almost every poster though. It seems to be what most people are saying. Surely there cant be this many mentally ill children around because they missed 3.5 months of school? I'd have been ecstatic if that happened to me.

Drivingdownthe101 · 09/08/2020 16:28

Maybe the ones whose children have suffered are drawn to threads about schools not returning?

monkeytennis97 · 09/08/2020 16:29

@Drivingdownthe101 is it really 'mental health' though or is that a nice cover for 'we are all sick of the sight of each other'?

Of course I totally understand if there have been true issues eg vulnerable and SEND children, siblings of SEND children, coping with bereavement etc

I think there may be more tears if their teacher ends up in ITU- that's not going to be great for their mental health either.