To let you into a secret about being slim.....

[Yellow1793]

I’m 5’2” and an untoned size 10. Over the last year or so (lockdown excluded) I’ve spent extended amounts of time with 4 different female friends, who are all taller, slimmer and considerably more toned than me. Aside from the fact that they all exercise at least 5 times a week, they also eat like birds. Their lifestyle revolves around making healthy choices, every single day, and I’m beginning to wonder if you do this consistently if you just stop feeling hungry. One of them regularly skips lunch. Another never has more than 2 glasses of alcohol in one sitting. Another always eats about 30% less than I do.....last time I was with her she had a small pasta portion for her lunch whilst serving me 3x the amount of pasta she had AND 2 sausages. No wonder she is tiny. None of them calorie count or talk about diets because their lifestyle choice is one big diet. I’d love to have their discipline.

From this thread it seems to fall in to two categories

Those who were overweight. Lost the weight and have to work hard to maintain.

Those who have never been overweight and either say no effort or their lifestyle and diet naturally lends itself to being slim through no hard effort nor deprivation.

Thankfully I fall in to the latter. And there’s a fair amount of us. But yes - if you’ve gone from 18 stone to 10 stone - you’ve buggered up your metabolism and probably don’t have the, let’s say, healthiest approach to food. Whereas many of us have never been overweight, so our body has suffered the consequences of that fact and.... is kind to us!

I think we all have different perceptions of what is a lot of food. I have a friend who is thin...met her in a cafe and she said she wasn't hungry because she'd had a crumpet and some raisins earlier in the day...it was 3pm. I'd be absolutely starving if that's all I'd had

How old are you and your friends OP? Because there comes a time you choose arse or face. I choose face and enjoy all the decadent things that keep it fat and wrinkle free.

Thats the first time I have ever heard that.....choose arse/face.

Brilliant!

It's a load of old nonsense I only ever see trotted out on Mumsnet.

Meanwhile in the real world, plenty of older slim people have lovely wrinkle-free complexions, whilst still enjoying decadent things.

You don't have to be fat to get that. Plus, a lot of fat faces that are wrinkle-free have jowls anyway.

Everything in moderation is better for mind and body.

@WorraLiberty

Makes me wonder whether people who spout the supposed dilemma between body vs face actually look in the magazines or indeed just look around them!

I suspect not. Probably case of sticking head in sand and trying to convince themselves that by shovelling that second packet of crisps in is actually meaning they have a better face than the slim person stopping at one packet or (gasp!) saying “no thanks”

eating as fuel and not as an emotional crutch or lifestyle - as in they aren’t massively arsed about food other than when they are eating it.

This is so true. I've always been quite slim in the past (not so much these days, thank you lockdown) and I've just never felt emotional about food. I enjoy flavours and tastes and eat when I'm hungry. I do snack but mostly when I'm bored. (been snacking a lot lately.) It's just not an emotional thing for me. When I'm anxious or upset I'm totally off my food, my stomach's in knots and I can't even think of eating.

My DP is the total opposite, he never stops snacking and is a total comfort eater.

Maybe there's something in people's brain chemistry that make us either emotional or not about food.

Re: Pizza I know it does always seem surprising how bad it is for you! Basically when I have an entire pizza I am having pretty much my days worth of calories and fat.

But when I have a pizza, its about 850 calories. eg half a large M&S pizza. Yes, it has fat and carbs and some cheese, but you do need some fat and carbs and cheese. And when I'm not dieting, I need to eat around 1700 calories per day, so a pizza fits into that quite nicely, if I don't stuff myself with chocolate and crisps.

I honestly don't see whats so bad about a pizza as opposed to eg a lasagne. Are people really that correct with their diets here that pizza is considered really bad?

I also do about an hour of exercise each day usually, either cycling or running or both.

@PurpleDaisies

Basically when I have an entire pizza I am having pretty much my days worth of calories and fat.

I think there’s a huge difference between homemade, frozen and take away pizza in terms of the fat and calories.

This is not homemade. Standard freezer fare 😊

[quote Waytoomuch82]@WorraLiberty

Makes me wonder whether people who spout the supposed dilemma between body vs face actually look in the magazines or indeed just look around them!

I suspect not. Probably case of sticking head in sand and trying to convince themselves that by shovelling that second packet of crisps in is actually meaning they have a better face than the slim person stopping at one packet or (gasp!) saying “no thanks”[/quote]
I think it's something they convince themselves of, so they can feel comfortable about remaining overweight.

In the same vein, I often read "I'm a size 16 but if I was any slimmer, I would look gaunt and ill".

Totally up to them if they want to believe that but I think it's like anything else...if they type it enough others reading it might start to believe it.

@formerbabe

I think we all have different perceptions of what is a lot of food. I have a friend who is thin...met her in a cafe and she said she wasn't hungry because she'd had a crumpet and some raisins earlier in the day...it was 3pm. I'd be absolutely starving if that's all I'd had

I'm slim and I would no way exist on that 😂😂

Love pizza ❤️

I’m skinny, work out four times a week, and literally don’t sit still. I’m walking the dogs, or tidying or finding a project. It’s just the way I’m wired. I also prefer healthy food. I’m half-Italian and was raised on home cooked food, with plenty of emphasis on fish, fruit, vegetables etc.

Not all slim people are on a permanent diet/ eat healthily/ excercise.
I was slim for about 25 years. I have always liked a walk but I didn't really excercise as such, I drank like a fish and ate huge portions ( a lot of vegetables, yes, but I also ate a lot of rice and kebabs or pizza whenever I felt like it). I ate chocolate and cake several times a week and never ever thought about dieting or food as a problem.
Then I hit perimenopause and my thyroid packed in, and now I'm a bit plump.
Never mind. Being thin or fat or in-between is just how it is. Not worth being miserable over. I would HATE to be one of those women who weighs food or talks about carbs as if they are crack. It's so boring and frankly unsexy!
Being healthy and happy is more important than being thin.

*It's a load of old nonsense I only ever see trotted out on

When I see it, I always assume that it's said by somebody with a huge arse trying to make somebody else with a huge arse feel better about having a huge arse.

This is not homemade. Standard freezer fare

Even so, going off what we’ve got in the freezer here a whole pizza is about 800-1000 calories and 40-50g of fat. Not health food but as an occasional meal I don’t think it’s that awful? Is that really your daily calorie allowance or do we just have particularly low cal (!!) pizzas in?

@shinyredbus

🤦🏻‍♀️Not this shit again. No. We don’t starve ourselves. No we don’t make healthy choices and work out 5 times a day. Stop generalising based on your group of friends.

I eat what I want and stop when I am full. Shock horror - at about 1am last night I was hungry and had half a family Cadburys while watching friends - not something that I haven’t been known to do. I absolutely binge drink when I want to on the weekends. I don’t over feed my friends. It’s just my metabolism. Peoples bodies are made differently - shocker. 🤷🏻‍♀️

Exactly this.

There's no "secret". Some of us are built differently. And lucky.

Yeah, im an untoned size 12 at 5'7.

Currently doing intermittent fasting/one meal a day, just started. Hoping it will actually shrink my stomach so i dont even want to eat as much anymore.

Yup, we are not all the same.

I'm sure people who're slim and always have been are doing many things right, but in my experience, they can't advise those of us who've had to keep an eye on things.

My BMI would creep up to 26 or now I'm older, 27 even if I didn't have a strategy to keep it at about 23.

After decades of knowing no better than calories in, calories out, I restricted calories. I was slim, but often hungrier than I wanted to be. I couldn't believe that all those ''naturally slim'' people out there were genuinely unaware or content to be hungry most evenings.

But since I tweaked my diet to include far fewer carbs and to have no fear of FAT, I am slim and not hungry at all.

There is no secret, but a lot of people still believe it's as simple as calories in and calories out and they don't factor in insulin sensitivity/resistance, ghrelin and being satiated, bodies being triggered by hormone levels to get back to their 'set' weight.

I'm fairly sure about it, coz I used to be stupid slim, and even though I loved being active, I'd have random fainting spells when out and about.

Many years ago as a teen I was diagnosed with anorexia nervosa. Underweight. I used to excercise in the morning and evening. Never fainted. Still did well in school even though I used to skip breakfast and throw my lunch in the bin.

Ive met both types. I lived with a skinny girl once for two years. She did not eat. Teeny tiny portions of food and vodka soda when she went out on the town plus lots of exercise.
I was also in uni with a really skinny girl who ate like a horse. She was shaped like a young boy and really upset she couldn't gain weight. I think people like her are in the minority.

I'd have random fainting spells when out and about.

When I'm fit, just after a really hard effort, peeing would make me almost faint. It's nothing to do with lack of stamina, but purely do micturition syncope, like most syncopes it's obviously more common in fit people because high blood pressure protects you. I expect your fainting was similarly related to being fit, rather than any sort of lack of stamina from being fit.

I'd be more concerned that you no longer have any sessions as it possible suggests your blood pressure is higher than it should be.

Once you get into the habit of eating very little, after about 4 days you don’t feel hungry any more. This is just my experience

Appreciate that's your experience but it was not mine. I went on a 1250 calorie a day diet in my 20's. After 9 months I broke. I woke up hungry thinking about food, I spent my day thinking about what I would eat and when I would eat it, I woke up in the middle of the night hungry. I devised plans for breakfasts that would fill me up with very few calories so I could have a decent lunch. I ate large salads for dinner but never felt sated even if my stomach had lots of food in it. Eventually I couldn't stand it anymore and I had to eat more.

What's the point of being slim if that means you have no stamina? I bet these thin ladies who eat like birds would not be able to pull the same mount of work in the garden as I do, or go and do such long walks (or pull an all-nighter at work when a deadline is looming, and still be able to function the next day)

Long distance athletes are almost invariably slim - it's the power to weight ratio. I mean you can comfort yourself that skinny people are weak, or whatever. Reality is some people are very wiry, slim and strong, with plenty of stamina.

It's weird how it's fine for people to say that thin people must have no life, never eat, no stamina, be boring and miserable; but if anyone ever says someone is overweight as they overeat or are too sedentary, that's not allowed. People always argue that it's fine as thin is the society ideal, but it's still hurtful to people. I've been underweight when we didnt have enough food growing up, to being overweight when in my teens my parents overcompensated with food as they could finally afford it, to a healthy weight now. So I've been all, and the reality is that I am mindful now of what I eat, but not miserable, happier with my body and with food than ever.

Eating disorders are sadly fairly common in women of all ages.

An ex of mine was super slim but ate entire bags of flavoured breadcrumbed chicken, with an entire bag of potato product, smothered in sauce, and lived on energy drinks and cake etc. No vegetables, no exercise, just ate like a pig.

I've had other friends like him. My youngest is also the same.

Where as myself and my eldest, and my partner, we have huge issues keeping weight off.

The only time I've been slim have been as a child/teen, then when my ED was rampant and I starved myself while overexercising, and then through a long-term abusive relationship.

So it's not always because someone eats like a sparrow and exercises to death.

What I will say, and I always say, is if I'm exercising lots then it's an incentive for me to put down the spoon, drink more water, eat more fruit and feel happier in myself.