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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Pissed off Yodel driver totally ignored long standing delivery instructions

94 replies

theprincessmittens · 06/08/2020 21:13

This happened earlier today, but I'm still pretty annoyed about it, and would be even without the whole social distancing implications.

I ordered from Littlewoods, delivery was by Yodel. I've always - for the last 8 years - had on my Littlewoods account that deliveries are not to be left if I'm not there. For the background behind that - I'm physically disabled, bipolar and have C-PTSD, and don't want to be bothering my neighbours I don't know to retrieve parcels. I had to move from my previous block of flats a year ago as I had to take my downstairs neighbour to court for threatening to kill myself, my cats and my partner on numerous occasions. The housing association took him to court, but he was still doing things like urinating on the stairs to my flat. My anxiety got so bad I was scared to leave my flat (partner doesn't live with me).

I'm now in another HA flat, a block of four, I live on the upper floor and I'm very happy here but have deliberately kept a distance from my neighbours. Of the 3 other flats, I've spoken to say hello to the two guys who live in the ground floor flats below me, but the guy who lives across from me ignores you if you encounter him in the communal hall...which suits me fine. He moved in about 3 months after I did.

Today I went out to pick up medication. The Yodel delivery was about 30 minutes after I got back....she knocked on the door, I said thank you without opening it, expecting her to leave the parcel and go, like they are supposed to still be doing. Instead she just kept standing there, and knocked on the door again. I opened the door, and she said 'oh my son tried to deliver this parcel earlier, you weren't in...and they guy who lives across from you refused point blank to take the parcel' She was very taken aback when I said 'Good, I prefer that, I don't want to be having to bother my neighbours for my parcels'

She then started arguing about how he could have 'done me a favour' ...and then said 'well at least he could have done ME a favour, I wouldn't have had to come back' I just shut the door at that.

Am I wrong to be so flipping pissed off with her? I talked to a friend about complaining, but as she seems to be the Yodel delivery person for my area, is she going to know that it was me that complained? I really don't want this happening again.

OP posts:
Original poster
theprincessmittens · 06/08/2020 22:01

There are 3 other flats to steal your parcels...

if I'm not there to let them in, they can't get to my flat door. I have to physically let them into the building but answering the intercom when they buzz my flat number. I then wait by the door, they leave it by the door, they knock on my door, I say thank you through the door, the leave, when they have gone I open the door and get my parcel. It takes less than 30 seconds. Royal Mail, Amazon, Tesco, Asda, Amazon Prime Now, Hermes, DPD...none of their delivery drivers have ever had a problem with delivering this way this since lockdown started.

OP posts:
RaspberryToupee · 06/08/2020 22:01

‘Do not leave’ is not the same as ‘do not leave with a neighbour’.

If you’re letting them past the buzzer, why aren’t you opening the door to them? If the parcel says do not leave, I think you need to open the door. Even if you buzz them in or see you in the window, they probably need to actually see you take it.
I get you’ve had a rough time with a previous neighbour and if you don’t want your parcel left with a neighbour then that’s fine. However, you need to let Littlewoods know they need to improve their delivery instructions and you need to try and be in when you’re getting a delivery then. It’s hard with Hermes and yodel because they don’t give you a time slot but they do notify you that it will be that day. If you can’t be in, you need a safe place for them to leave it which doesn’t have to be with a neighbour and specify on the delivery instructions what your safe place is. I don’t think it’s reasonable to expect a delivery driver to keep coming back because you don’t want your parcel left with a neighbour or in a safe spot.

Original poster
theprincessmittens · 06/08/2020 22:01

@Ellisandra She didn't have to come back...it was her son who attempted the first delivery, not her.

OP posts:
Original poster
theprincessmittens · 06/08/2020 22:04

@RaspberryToupee The other options are to leave with a selected neighbour or safe place. Do not leave means do not leave full stop. It's pretty clear.

OP posts:
Shodan · 06/08/2020 22:05

It's been standard practice here, over the last few months, for delivery drivers to knock, wait to hear an acknowledgement/see the door open, and retreat to their van.

I don't understand why this wasn't sufficient for this particular delivery driver tbh.

It matters not what we on MN think DO NOT LEAVE would mean to us- I'm sure the Yodel delivery drivers know perfectly well what it means.

If your delivery instructions were clear- do not leave with neighbours- and they tried to leave it with neighbours, then they're not doing their job properly.

It might be worth looking up what Yodel's standard practices are at the moment, to see if they were being reasonable to insist you open the door.

Original poster
theprincessmittens · 06/08/2020 22:05

*by answering the intercom

OP posts:
Ellisandra · 06/08/2020 22:08

@theprincessmittens serious question: what was the point in posting in AIBU if you didn’t want anyone to tell you that they see this differently?

If you’re so sure you’re right, sleep easy knowing you’re right.

You come across as if you’re being deliberately obtuse. OK, so it wasn’t literally her second journey to your house, but she was making the second trip. Between her and her son, only one payment was being made for that delivery.

She did a nice thing.

viques · 06/08/2020 22:10

I am with Team Neighbour - I wouldn't take parcels in for you either.

Darkdecent · 06/08/2020 22:10

As a delivery driver who is run off my feet at the moment and also bearing in mind we only get paid 50p to deliver the parcel, we don't get paid to go back again and again, 50p and no petrol allowance.

I'd be mightily pissed off with a customer like you. I'd also not be in any rush to get your parcels to you In future. You were very rude!

Seriously, us deliver drivers have worked all through lockdown delivering anything and everything. We don't know where the parcels have been or if they've been handle by someone with the virus. We've also had -the odd- customer who treats us like we're lepers.

doityourselfnow · 06/08/2020 22:10

Totally agree with @Ellisandra !

AIBU

Yes

No I'm not because I'm xyz

Yes you are

No I'm not!

Yeah YABU!

Whenwillthisbeover · 06/08/2020 22:11

You sound nuts. None issue. Seriously not worth posting, in face why am I posting a reply. Biscuit

ChardonnaysPetDragon · 06/08/2020 22:11

No good deed left unpunished.

doityourselfnow · 06/08/2020 22:12

Exactly @Darkdecent Ffs what the fuck do people expect in the current circumstances!

Moondust001 · 06/08/2020 22:12

Couriers are supposed to deliver things to you in person, regardless of your instruction to leave it. If it disappears it is their fault, not yours. The sender is the client, not you, and they've paid for it to be delivered to you. I understand that you have anxieties, but your are being unreasonable, and so are the couriers who leave parcels outside your door in a public place. It surely isn't too hard for you to partially open the door, say thank you and pick it up?

Crumpets111 · 06/08/2020 22:12

Get a grip OP like seriously

NotSuchASmugMarriedNow1 · 06/08/2020 22:16

Have you thought about having stuff delivered to a collection point?

Viviennemary · 06/08/2020 22:17

She was just trying to do a job and deliver a parcel. You were being a pain. Sorry if that's not what you want to hear. Do not leave means dont leave at the door don't leave at the neighbours.

Ellisandra · 06/08/2020 22:18

@Goodoldfashionedploverboy is spot on that people don’t know what it is to live your life.

But can you not think about the angle that neither of you did anything wrong?

You didn’t want your neighbour to take the parcel in, to open your door - OK. That’s how you need to live.

The delivery person was not wrong to think that “do not leave” meant that even if they could by letter of the policy leave it on the doorstep indoors (and did they actually hear your “thank you”?) it would be nicer to knock again. And maybe they did want to tell you’d about your neighbour and have a friendly interaction and maybe a thank you for coming back. You’re not wrong for not wanting that, but they’re not wrong for offering it.

Maybe, because of your own issues you even couldn’t help - in that moment - shutting them door on them.

But can’t you look at this and this and think, “ugh - that didn’t go well for anyone. Move on!” ?

Continuing to feel annoying with someone sharing 50p with their son for delivering that parcel twice just seems like such an utter waste of your emotional energy.

2155User · 06/08/2020 22:20

Oh these are my all time favourite types of AIBU

This is where even after 1000 responses saying OP is BU, OP will still say they are not BU

Pointless.
Utterly pointless.

RaspberryToupee · 06/08/2020 22:21

[quote theprincessmittens]@RaspberryToupee The other options are to leave with a selected neighbour or safe place. Do not leave means do not leave full stop. It's pretty clear.[/quote]
Well unless the delivery driver is a regular customer of Littlewoods, how is she meant to know there is a ‘leave with neighbour’ option and therefore not selecting that means you don’t want it left with a neighbour? To me, ‘do not leave’ means do no leave unattended, which it wouldn’t be with a neighbour. It’s actually not that clear, there is a lot of ambiguity in that, especially when you don’t have the other options.

You could try asking the delivery driver if she’s a regular Littlewoods customer and noticed the different options, but you might have to open the door for that...

It also doesn’t matter that her son attempted the first delivery. She still doesn’t get paid until that parcel is delivered.

I’ve lived on a shitty estate and not wanted my parcels left with my crack head neighbours. I get you on that front. I have always either made sure I’m in for deliveries (still do now that I’m not with the crack head neighbours) or get the delivery drivers to leave it some place safe. My flat wasn’t like yours, it didn’t have an intercom to let people in. My front door opened on the street. Still if I wasn’t in when my parcel was due to be delivered, I left delivery instructions for it to be left someplace safe.

Estrellente · 06/08/2020 22:23

Nope, sorry, this is your stuff causing the issue, not them.

Namechangearoo · 06/08/2020 22:23

Why did you ask if YWBU if you weren’t prepared to hear a resounding ‘yes’?

Hairthrowaway · 06/08/2020 22:25

You sound like hard work.

With any luck, karma will bite you back and yodel will refuse to deliver to you any more.

Iloveyoutothefridgeandback · 06/08/2020 22:27

YABU to expect yodel to pay attention to any delivery instructions. Massively lower your expectations. They are shit.

Staplemaple · 06/08/2020 22:29

Do not leave sounds like do not leave on doorstep, just because they are on the drop down for Littlewoods, it doesn't mean that the delivery driver will interpret it like that (they after all deliver parcels from loads of companies). Your neighbour didn't take it in anyway.

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