To think shop workers shouldn't be asking people why they aren't wearing a mask?

[GlummyMcGlummerson]

My friend is epileptic. She can't wear a mask because it takes very little to trigger a fit, and wearing a mask creates too much of a risk. Over the last 2 days she's been asked in 3 different places (Greggs, Morrison's and the Co-Op) in an abrupt and snotty way "Where is your mask?" By staff. This is with lots of other customers around. She responded "I'm medically exempt" and has been asked why she's exempt in two of those places. She's also been told (online) that she should stay in to protect others and get someone else to do her shopping etc.

AIBU to think this is appalling ableist behaviour to put someone on the spot in front of others? She doesn't owe anyone her medical history. Yes there's sunflower lanyards she can pick up but she's apprehensive about wearing anything around her neck for obvious reasons. Why can't we just trust others that they're doing it in their best interests?

I take everything back. No one should have to wear a mask. Every line is exempt. The British public does not have enough common sense to wear masks. I've lost count of the number people who have took their mask off to speak to me and then hand me money with the same hand they adjusted their mask with or who've adjusted their mask by pulling at the part covering their mouth and then touched produce.

Also is it illegal to spray sanitizer on unsuspecting people? I'll avoid the eyes.

On mumsnet retail staff are seen as below standard. There are threads everywhere about retail staff even teachers. Some people on here do not understand the pressure staff are under even more now than ever. Do people think we like being shouted at or spat at like my manager was.
Just because we work in retail and on minimum wage doesn't mean were beneath a customer

We have worked right through this from day 1 with no protection and still have to do our jobs.
If someone asks wild you wear a mask stop getting all petty and say no sorry I'm exempt that's all.
The petty ones are the ones who look down on shop workers and we know who you are by the way you act when speaking to us.

@Drumple

The difference is staff aren’t allowed by law to ask me why I haven’t a mask on.

And the woman who asked me wasn’t kindly. And I was wearing a big badge and lanyard.
I assume you don’t have a lanyard and badge that states why you’ve been off?

Why does me wearing a lanyard make any difference? Are you saying that as I'm not wearing a lanyard it's fine for customers to ask me intrusive questions? So, if someone goes into a shop without a mask or lanyard, according to your logic, it's ok for staff to ask them why?

On the government's own site it clearly says that shops can refuse entry if they think a customer doesn't have a valid exemption - which begs the question how is the validity of the exemption proven? It also implies that it is the shops responsibility to make sure that everyone who can wear a mask, does.

So, really it's government at fault, again, for producing laws that are contradictory and frankly useless

@HearhoovesthinkzebrasI didn’t say anything like that at all. You’re reaching.

I know you’re upset but I haven’t done anything wrong or anything to you.

Back off me please.

Oh and you can get those lanyard even in facebook. Just because your wearing one a staff member wont always know what it is. After all we see so many lanyard there nothing we take notice off. So if a shop assistant asks you just show it to them as we routinely dont look at what lanyard people are wearing.

@Willow2017

And I'd accept that staff were just doing their job if they asked me why I didn't have a mask on. People find different things offensive Ffs pot and kettle?? You don't like customers asking you personal questions but it's ok for staff to do it to customers? If you don't tell customers your private medical stuff why would you tell some random in a shop?

It's not just offensive its against current law.

Firstly, I do tell customers about my condition when they ask. I do find it intrusive and offensive but there's no way of avoiding it without coming across as rude.

Secondly, you accuse me of double standards but not Drumple. How come? Only they think it's fine for customers to ask intrusive questions about my illness and don't see it a problem to answer but don't want to be questioned themselves - that's double standards too, right?

And you might think it's not embarrassing to say you've been shielding, but I don't want to tell people and then have them ask why etc etc. Just like others on here don't want to tell all and sundry their business, nor do I. Doesn't stop customers from asking though and there's no protection for me when they do.

I said that they shouldn’t be asking you and I said I was sorry you were being asked.

Maybe you should get a new job @Hearhoovesthinkzebras. It sounds as if retail isn't for you

@Hearhoovesthinkzebras plenty of people on various threads think it's ok to ask customers intrusive questions if they aren't wearing a lanyard so presumably they think it works both ways. Not a view I agree with, I think its abominable to ask anyone intrusive questions.

Only they think it's fine for customers to ask intrusive questions about my illness and don't see it a problem to answer but don't want to be questioned themselves - that's double standards too, right?

@Hearhoovesthinkzebras

I never said that.

I said

Add message | Report | Message poster | Quote | See all Drumple Thu 06-Aug-20 19:32:56
I wouldn’t ask you anything.

I’m sorry people are asking after you. I’d have taken kindly.

I also said

m sorry you’re struggling but I am not doing any of those things and I can’t answer for those who do. I wouldn’t ask you anything.

And I also said you should just say something vague and had no need to give any personal information.

@Drumple

I said that they shouldn’t be asking you and I said I was sorry you were being asked.

And you also said they were only being kind - insinuating that I shouldn't be upset by it.

You might find it kind, I don't I find it nosey and intrusive. It's overstepping the mark in my book and assumes familiarity. I then feel obliged to answer more in depth than I feel comfortable with.

And my point about me wearing a lanyard is that I do that to preempt being asked. I have a lanyard with a card on it that clearly indicates I am exempt. And asks for understanding.

I’m doing more than I Have to

Then don't bloody answer. Use any one of the ideas pp have suggested to respond

I said I personally would find it kindly - in the circumstances you described of them being a regular customer. I wasn’t insinuating anything.

@Pollypocket89

Maybe you should get a new job *@Hearhoovesthinkzebras*. It sounds as if retail isn't for you

Why? Because I don't want to answer questions about my medical condition? Why does that mean I shouldn't work in retail? Is it obligatory then?

And as I said.

I am sorry your struggling. I don’t do any of those things and I wouldn’t do any of those things. I wouldn’t question you. I can’t answer for those who do.

Please stop.

Hearhoovesthinkzebras

From.a fellow retail worker you dont have to tell them anything just say I'm really sorry but that's personal and move on. If the customer finds that rude then it's there problem any any manager would back you up on that. We are there to help customers but not to give them any personal information about ourselves. Some customers are just intrigued just change the subject if they persist.

No, none of those things. It's because every post you make about it sounds like it's a living hell for you so don't put yourself through it

Please stop

I'm sorry Drumple but she won't. I've seen it on other threads, she will keep on and on even when clearly upset posters have begged her to stop attacking them. You have to try to ignore.

For what it's worth I also think you've been treated really badly and hope it doesn't happen again.

Drumple

Stop addressing me then. Don't blame me for answering your posts that are directed at me. Stop addressing me and I won't have any reason to respond to you.

Only they think it's fine for customers to ask intrusive questions about my illness and don't see it a problem to answer but don't want to be questioned themselves - that's double standards too, right?

Ffs stop twisting things yet again. (Every fecking thread!)
That wasn't what was said at all as you well know. Not one person has said you have to tell customers anything you don't want to.

hearhoovesthinkzebras you ok love? Feel there's a lot of suppressed anger in there?

@hearhooves I haven't seen you stand up for customers when other posters think it's ok to ask them intrusive questions.

[quote countrygirl99]@hearhooves I haven't seen you stand up for customers when other posters think it's ok to ask them intrusive questions.[/quote]
Personally, I don't think shop staff should be expected to ask people to.prove they are exempt but I do think there should be a way of proving exemption. The government however, do appear to be placing responsibility at the door of shops for enforcing this, whilst simultaneously saying that no one should be asked to prove exemption. It quite literally does not make sense. Why does anyone need to wear a mask - it's either critical to controlling Covid, or it's not. If it is, then unfortunately for government it will cost in terms of resourcing an exemption scheme and in personnel to police it. If it isn't important then stop trying to compel law abiding people into doing it whilst allowing chancers to not do it.

Everyone is protesting that the rights of people with disabilities are being eroded but what they mean is the rights of people who can't wear masks. There are many disabled people who will be relying on people to wear masks and no doubt those people will have to avoid shops and public transport if too many people stop wearing masks, but the interests of those disabled people are just ignored. Maybe we need shops and buses for people wearing masks and the same for people not wearing masks?