To change my baby's name?

[nothereoften]

DH and I spent ages trying to choose a name for our DS. I eventually said we could use the name he preferred but now I’m not sure - it feels a bit like the wrong name/someone else’s baby’s name and I don’t like hearing other people use it. We have to register him next week - should I push to have the name I prefer instead, or will I grow to love the other name?!? Anyone been in this situation?! How did it work out?

(To add: DH doesn’t like the name I prefer, so he would be gutted to change it)

You need to find a different name that you both like.

I don’t think you can ask him to change it to a name your DH doesn’t like but you definitely should change it to a name you both like and perhaps use the current name as a middle name.

Care to share the name? I chose ds's name whilst pregnant so he was his name right away!! Choosing one post birth means a period of baby growing into the name I think. If you really can't imagine using it tell dh and choose a new one altogether... Don't go along with his choice if you feel you may resent him over it. Not a good start to parenthood!

Get your post moved to baby names.

I would tell your DH that you are not getting used to the name at all and want to rename him, then agree on a name you both like.

You, as the mother, should get the final say.

Yes, change it. Choose a third name that you both like, the ‘his name’ vs ‘your name thing needs to stop. You can apply for extra time to register iirc.

I thought I’d adjust to DDs name with time but 13 years on I still really, really wish we’d gone with something else.

I’d also be interested to hear the names

You, as the mother, should get the final say.
Why?

You, as the mother, should get the final say.

I disagree with this statement.

OP, if you really don’t like the name, definitely change it but you need to find a name you both like. It’s not fair to name the child something only one of you likes and the other doesn’t.

@MikeUniformMike

Get your post moved to baby names.

I would tell your DH that you are not getting used to the name at all and want to rename him, then agree on a name you both like.

You, as the mother, should get the final say.

Why should mothers get the final say?

Mother gets the final say ..always

@Veganfortheanimals

Mother gets the final say ..always

Why?

Change it, but to one you both like.

@Veganfortheanimals

Mother gets the final say ..always

How ridiculous. Your relationship isn't the blueprint for everyone else's, you do know that?

You need to let go of the one you love, and your DH needs to do the same, then find a third name that you can agree on. DH and I had to do that. I told him to take X off the table as I'd never agree to it. He said fine, but I had to do the same with Y. And then we came up with Z.

If you don't mind you DHs choice, you could offer to keep it as a middle name?

Mother gets the final say ..always

Because fathers never have to use or hear the name?

I agree with the others who have said to choose a new name that you both like.

if it was suggested that fathers get the final say there would be anarchy and rightly so. if a couple are together then the name should be a joint decision. mothers shouldn't get the final say because they've'been growing this child for the last 9 months and had to go through the birth ' bollocks.

You, as the mother, should get the final say.

Man hating sexism at its best right there

I was in the same position and night before registering I told him I don’t want the name. We sat up all night choosing another and glad I did. You can always move your appointment for a later date if you need more time. I think you get six weeks x

Man hating sexism at its best right there

Wow. Quite an extreme response!

I agree with others, you need a name you both like!

@ivfdreaming, not at all.

The baby will probably have the father's surname, which might be the same as the mother's, so she should get the last say with the first name.

YANBU. Find one now before you register. One you both at least like, even if you can't find one you're both in LOVE with iyswim.

Poor menz though, they suffer so much sexism, unlike those nasty women...oh wait .

But yes, I think you do both have to like the name- that includes you!

The baby will probably have the father's surname, which might be the same as the mother's, so she should get the last say with the first name.

The baby is not a cake that you can split in half, with an eye twitching because the other gets "more".

Yes you really need to change it.

The additional issue would be that if you didn't grow to like it - and if you don't now, you quite probably won't - then because it's 'your DHs' choice, you'll resent him for it too.

You need a new name entirely.

Could you post the name, and your favourite? Folk here would be so useful in trying to think up options somewhere in the middle!