I cannot stand loud people

[AWiseWomanOnceSaidFuckThisShit]

Kind of lighthearted kind of not. I have extreme misophonia.

Door slammers, drawer bangers, high pitched laughs that pierce right through you from your eyeballs to your toes, people who dig their heels into the floor like it's quicksand making the whole room vibrate, crisp crunchers, apple biters, tea slurpers, loud chewers, throat clearers, tutters, booming voices that echo through the walls.

People should come with a remote control... just shut the fuck up! 😫

I understand, op. There are sounds that actually hurt my ears and make me upset. ( The upset is momentary but can feel extreme) All three of my children are also upset by certain noises..

Not loud noises but my dad does this thing where he hums/sings/talks but it's barely audible. He does it in the car if I'm driving them somewhere and it honestly makes me want to punch him because it really fucking grates on me.

My mother on the other hand just talks constantly and sometimes I'd just like her to be quiet.

Urgh. DS and DH walk with their heels.

They accuse me of creeping

This thread is making me feel very self conscious as a hard of hearing person. I've always known that I was kind of loud but I always reasoned that I can't help it and I'm not hurting anyone.
Judging by this thread I must have made several strangers seethe with silent rage. And they probably thought it was for no reason too, as I don't wear a sign.

I can't stand the noise of people eating. When I'm at work and people ring and all I can hear is "smack, slurp, crunch"
"Oh sorry I was eating some muesli"
YES I CAN FUCKING HEAR YOU
I think eating down the phone is rude anyway but the rage it makes me feel...

With eating, it's so much quieter if the person eats with their mouth closed. It's not rocket science, and not only for reducing noise, it's good manners too.

@Enoughnowstop

One of my children is loud. It is a feature of his dyspraxia. He can’t help it. He drives me insane with it but it is also one of the things that makes him the lovely, unique person he is. Nice to k ow he is being judged constantly by people who k ow sod all about him.

The OP hates loud noises owing to her misophonia. Your son makes loud noises owing to his dyspraxia. Neither party is being unreasonable.

The OP didn't say anything judgmental and you even said yourself, "He drives me insane with it," so stop looking for a way to be offended when no-one was being offensive.

@Greenglassteacup

Are you self-diagnosing misophonia? There seems to be a lot of this on Mumsnet.

I'm sure you're right, but what would be the advantage of a diagnosis - is there any form of treatment?

Misophonia is miserable - I once threatened to glue a co-workers keyboard to their desk because they would absentmindedly pick it up and tap it on the desk when they were thinking.

Crunching crisps, jingling keys and change in pockets, clicking pens, all set me off. The absolute WORST though for me is someone slurping food or pouring water in a glass, all films seem to use it and I find it difficult to even pour liquid myself on bad days! I have to stick my fingers in my ears for film "pouring liquid" scenes, even though its usually a few seconds. Garden water features though are totally fine, I have no idea why.

Its like nails on a chalkboard, its not an option to ignore it, its ALL I can hear or think about until it stops, like someone poking you in the eyeball. Headphones are an absolutely required office item for me.

And yes, people are allowed to make noise. Noise exists in the world.
That doesnt change how deeply unpleasant these noises are for people who suffer because you can't close your ears.

I get you OP but I don't know what to do about it. I've always felt on edge hearing certain noises but only realised I had a problem when I couldn't watch Dexter (the TV series) - not because of the gore but because I found the way the title character eats - and he eats a lot - to be so revolting I couldn't concentrate on the story and I was constantly on edge looking out for when he was going to eat again. At first I thought this was a common experience among viewers but it really wasn't - it was just me.

So: what can we do about it?

Can it get better with therapy op? Because it seems like a horrible existence living the way you do

Noise cancelling headphones saved my life - seriously... I now have 3 sets & always have one set on charge & one set in my handbag.

Not cheap but well worth the investment for the sake of your metal health....

I can't stand squealing/shrieking children ( especially whilst their parents just sit there messing with their phones whilst they ignore their screaming offspring) practically gives me a panic attack :-(

YANBU OP. I am not sure what to recommend other that noise cancelling headphones though and careful consideration of where you go and what activities you do. I too suffer badly from this and in all honesty wfh has been so much better than normal life. You have my empathy.

YANBU op. Although I don't have misophonia I definitely prefer quite environments rather than loud, and I hate unnecessary noise. Can't stand things like loud motorbikes (absolutely HATE Harleys), door slammers, and persistent barking dogs. I stayed with friends for a while and it drove me nuts. He bellows on the phone, has the TV loud, I can hear his conference calls through the walls (on the opposite side of the house and the next floor up!), he stomps around like he's a bloody elephant, the son slams doors, and they let their dogs bark and bark before eventually shouting at them to shut up. His wife can be out in the garden letting the dogs bark continuously for ages as though it's no big deal. They're lovely in many ways but they''d be my neighbours from hell.