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AIBU?

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Original poster

Baby with pierced ears

170 replies

mrsbeeton999 · 31/07/2020 11:16

School mum friend had baby in April and I’ve just noticed she’s had her ears pierced. Scrolling back through her Facebook they were pierced at beginning of July when piercing was still not open. This is seriously bad isn’t it? I’m a bit judgy about babies with pierced ears anyway so this might be clouding my opinion but having a new babies ears pierced illegally during a pandemic has really annoyed me

OP posts:
SchrodingersImmigrant · 31/07/2020 17:29

There is a lots of conflicting advice amongst professionals about the earring turning.

MrsAvocet · 31/07/2020 17:29

I don't like piercings in general, even less on children who can't consent, but whatever my personal feelings, there is no legal minimum age in the UK. You can't assume it was done illegally just because piercing studios were shut OP. Given that you say that the mother is "a school mum" I am guessing that she is not a close friend? So can you be certain that she, her partner, a family member or friend is not a piercer who did it at home? Lockdown has led to a lot of conclusions being jumped to. My DD has been accused of lockdown breaking after being spotted with a new hairdo whilst salons were closed. In fact she has a flatmate who is a hairdresser and curiously they both had a bit of time on their hands.Hmm

Happyheartlovelife · 31/07/2020 17:43

I think because people have an issue with it (answering those who says what others do. Ignore it. Doesn't affect you)

There aren't many things where we cause pain to a baby. Make holes in our child's body or baby. . Could end up hospitalised with infection. All for cosmetics reasons

Can you?

66redballons · 31/07/2020 17:55

@TeaStory. Never knew that.

TeaStory · 31/07/2020 17:58

@66redballons I’ve got quite a few piercings (all done by my choice & consent, not as a baby!) and have a strong interest in piercing. It’s important to get good info out there, having seen the results of poor aftercare.

ComeOnBabyPopMyBubble · 31/07/2020 17:59

She's not Spanish is she? Friend at work who is Spanish told me they pierce baby's ears in the hospital there

It's not just Spain either. In several European countries the ears get pierced in the hospital. I missed out on it as I was abandoned so I had mine done at two.

Nothing to raise your eye brow at . It's a cultural thing , done in a sterile environment by a midwife or doctor.

DD hasn't had hers done as a baby because her (English) dad didn't want her to. His reasons were daft in my eyes, but since I didn't care one way or another I followed his lead.

She had them done at 7 instead.

jessstan2 · 31/07/2020 18:21

LB1982 Fri 31-Jul-20 17:26:29
TeaStory

@LB1982 you must NOT turn healing piercings!

Thank you blush That was the advice when I was a teen (and got my second piercing).
.....
That was what I was told when I had my ears pierced at 14. You have to let a small scab form and come off naturally by which time the hole has healed around the ring. Then you can move the rings.

Planetneptune · 31/07/2020 18:25

Piercing a babies ears is unnecessary and vile. And the people telling you it’s none of your businesses are probably feeling personally offended. What on here is really anyone else’s business? It’s a discussion forum.

Thurmanmurman · 31/07/2020 18:37

I had mine done as a baby in the late 1970s. My mum is not some sort of child abuser like some of the posters on here make out. I wouldn't personally get a baby's ears pierced as I think they should have a say but some people get so hysterical about itConfused

TheNewLook · 31/07/2020 18:38

Why is it barbarism is often acceptable so long as it’s “cultural”? And especially so long as it’s directed towards females?

RedRumTheHorse · 31/07/2020 18:39

@PinkConfetti when they ask for it and the healing can fit around them being at school.

One of my childhood friends' wasn't allowed pierced ears until 16 and made a fuss from 11 about it. There as another's, whose parents I also know, could have got it done any time she asked. She didn't ask and just randomly got it done as an adult.

Anotherlovelybitofsquirrel · 31/07/2020 18:41

Feel free to judge. It's vile. I hate seeing babies and toddlers with pierced ears. Tacky! Unfair too. The fact they're pierced in lockdown is awful too.

carlablack · 31/07/2020 18:42

YANBU at all.
For starters, this is done just for mother's enjoyment because a baby doesn't even know about earrings let alone wanting one. It's just a painful and uncomfortable thing for the baby. Even if it's cared for and cleaned regularly, baby can keep picking on them causing them to get infected overnight.

Piercing hole heals very quickly when fresh, so the earrings cannot be taken out for long, esp. first 3 months.

Piercing baby's ears has no medical benefit whatsoever and it hurts. My heart breaks thinking about the shots my DD will have to receive, I cannot help but consider piercings some form of child abuse to be honest.

I have 3 holes on each lobe. I'm more than willing to let DD get them when they are old enough to care how they looked. I will educate her on how to care for pierced ears. But as a baby? That's a big NOPE.

EmbarrassedUser · 31/07/2020 18:44

I hate it so much. I was in Claire’s a couple of years ago and this woman came in with this gorgeous little girl who I’d estimate to be 6 months at the most. The baby was all smiley and laughing. Until the shop assistant pierced her ear. The crying was horrendous and her face was red and she kept squirming. It brought tears to my eyes and I had to leave the shop, it was all I could think about all day. Is it just so these women can have a real life ‘dolly’ Not meaning to generalise but babies with pierced ears often seem to sport those ridiculously chavvy bows on their heads too. It’s like the uniform of chavs and the stupid.

TheNewLook · 31/07/2020 18:49

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

EmbarrassedUser · 31/07/2020 18:51

@DopamineHits

When I see a baby with pierced ears I assume the parents have a complex about people not knowing she's a girl, and possibly calling her a boy.
I think the exact same when I see a baby with a stupid bow. It’s like they’re desperately going ‘see, she’s a girl’ ‘look, a girl’ I just really don’t care, I just want to go home 😆
RedRumTheHorse · 31/07/2020 18:52

@carlablack nonsense.

Then again all my percings were done with a needle.

19lottie82 · 31/07/2020 18:53

Anyone doing it or wanting it done is a
moron.

So almost every Mother of a baby girl in most Latino cultures, are morons? 🤔

I wouldn’t get a baby’s ears pierced, but you need to accept that different things are different in different cultures.

For example it’s extremely common for baby boys to get circumcised in Northern America. Personally I find that worse than ear piercing.

ComeOnBabyPopMyBubble · 31/07/2020 18:53

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn as it quotes a deleted post.

FlyingPandas · 31/07/2020 18:55

YANBU OP - this is a complete bugbear of mine - but it always staggers me the number of people who defend it.

If I could pass a law, I would make all ear (and any other body part) piercing illegal for any child younger than 11 or 12. Why on earth you'd do it any younger is beyond me.

RedRumTheHorse · 31/07/2020 18:55

@EmbarrassedUser

I hate it so much. I was in Claire’s a couple of years ago and this woman came in with this gorgeous little girl who I’d estimate to be 6 months at the most. The baby was all smiley and laughing. Until the shop assistant pierced her ear. The crying was horrendous and her face was red and she kept squirming. It brought tears to my eyes and I had to leave the shop, it was all I could think about all day. Is it just so these women can have a real life ‘dolly’ Not meaning to generalise but babies with pierced ears often seem to sport those ridiculously chavvy bows on their heads too. It’s like the uniform of chavs and the stupid.
Why the hell would you go to Claires to get your ears pierced? They aren't specialists and use a gun.
InFiveMins · 31/07/2020 18:55

YABU, because you should be minding your own business. It doesn't affect you and isn't your baby. I wouldn't get worked up about someone else choosing to have their baby's ears pierced.

KittyFantastico · 31/07/2020 18:57

never heard you shouldn’t turn pierced earrings. The opposite in-fact.

When DD got hers done we were told not to turn them. They said to very gently (and with clean hands) push the earring from the back so the front of the post sticks out a little and dribble on some surgical spirit or other cleaning fluid, then repeat but pushing gently on the front to make the back stick out a little.

It's just a painful and uncomfortable thing for the baby

I'm not advocating piercing babies but, done correctly aka not at bloody Claire's ear piercing shouldn't hurt. DD had hers done at 6yo with a needle and didn't even realise the piercing was finished, she asked "am I getting it now?" and we told her it was already done. No tears, no pain, no problems with healing.

Dogsorlogs · 31/07/2020 19:04

Honestly can't get worked up about what others do with their kids, as long as its done safely and looked after properly.

My 4 year old had her ears pierced last year after begging for months and months, didn't flinch and still now shows everyone her beautiful earrings. None of her friends have theirs done and that's their parents choice, I'd hate to think they judged me for it.

mathanxiety · 31/07/2020 19:10

YANBU.

It's none of your business.

Piercing of babies' and young girls' ears is done around the world and is important in some cultures.

Contrary to some of the ridiculous frothing here, it is not in the same league as FGM.