To think it's rude when people put me on loud speaker on the phone without telling me?

[Nickelallergy891]

DM always does this! One minute I can hear her, the next I can hear pots and pans and my own voice echoing (and knowing her DP can hear every word).... Sometimes I've even heard her weeing in the background! 😳🤣

Not just DM either - Some friends do this too.

I rarely put people on speaker phone but if I do I always say "Do you mind if pop you on speaker for a mo as I'm just doing XYZ".

I feel like this one is going to divide the crowd!
AIBU in wanting a heads up?

It's rude. I always used to say ”I’ll phone you back when you're not busy” and hang up.

It worked.

Not an issue for speaker as such.
But yes if speaker and someone else can hear too.

Yanbu. My boss does this. Very rude.

Meant to add "Light hearted" but it submitted before I got the chance! I know it's nothing to get worked up about, just mildly irksome...

My DM does this too. Kills my pig.

It's very rude and I hate being on speakerphone. My mum starting doing this a few years ago when she would be pottering around her kitchen and the echo and noise did my head in. I very quickly told her I would no longer have any speakerphone conversations, but she was welcome to call back when she wasn't busy.

Ha ha, glad it's not just my DM! I feel like the conversation is often not the main focus any more, and I'd rather just ring them back when we are both ready to talk properly!

@SpongeBobJudgeyPants

Thats much worse than putting someone on speaker phone!

I once threatened to cut off a client's balls when I was in a call with a company director. I was on speaker phone and I hadnt been told and yup the client was in the office at the other end.

YANBU OP, I find it very rude.

My DP does this as well even when he's with other people...but it's not the background noise which bothers me but rather the "nasty" comments that I could do about whoever happens to be with him...stuff like asking me if I wanna go out with X and me saying: "no waaaaay, they/he/she bore me as hell"...

@dionethediabolist Oh god, this is exactly what I dread! Nothing bad has happened to that extent so far, but I was once told off for saying "shit" on the phone to my friend as her DD was sat in the car next to her and I was on speaker without realising.

I never put people on loudspeaker because like many of you, it feels really rude to me.
I also hate to think anyone I'm speaking to believes they're on loudspeaker too, made so much more difficult when I'm with someone who insists on telling me or reminding me what I need to say to the person on the phone. Now that really makes me angry!!!

I have a friend who does this and it drives me mad! I wish should would just say, can’t talk, with someone call you back...
She does it when I am with her too, which I find rude, I don’t want to sit and listen to a whole convo when we’re trying to catch up!

mum always does this, I say hello, then she says ooh Im just running upstairs on speaker so your dad can hear.
I don't always want to talk to both of them!!

My aunt does it and I detest it.

Whoops I was chatting to my son the other night and popped him on speaker so I could have my hands free I’ll double check with him next time! (However I promise no pigs were harmed in the course of the conversation.)

DM always does this! One minute I can hear her, the next I can hear pots and pans and my own voice echoing

So annoying this but also I did laugh at the way you described it. It’s so true!

I'd end the call

My DH does this. But what also annoys me is that he'll ring someone, say his mum to make a plan. I'm sat quietly in the background minding my own business. Then he'll say "I'll just pop you on speaker so Keha can hear" and before I know it, I've been pulled into the conversation and am making the plans instead.

I often use speaker as I don’t like holding the phone against my ear as it gets really hot. I’m not meaning to be rude and I don’t have it on speaker if there’s anyone else around who can hear the convo, but it’s just so much easier! 🤷‍♀️

I don’t mind if someone is driving. But I will be monosyllabic if I’m unsure as to whether there’s someone else in the car too.

Otherwise I say “I can’t hear a thing, have you got me on speaker? Hello, HELLO?? What??” and generally behave so annoyingly they take me off speaker.

Yes, this is rude and a bit risky really, like the pp cutting off client's balls conversation for you! This is why on work calls people all introduce themselves at the beginning, or say, "hi Sue, thanks for joining the call. I have Brian here with me..." or whatever.

YANBU

I don't think it's a big deal. I don't personally do it because I can't hear very well but if someone does it to me, I don't care.

Yes! My dad does this so my mum can add her 2p instead of muttering in the background.
Just whacks me on speaker with no warning & I find myself having two conversations at once.

If they’re alone it’s fine but if there are others present then I think they should ask.