To find my report from breast clinic condescending?

[duletty]

I’m 44, had breastfeeding pain for a few months and then found a large lump on the underside of my arm near arm pit.
Gp arranged a quick appointment (was three weeks when usually a two week wait)....
Any way after mammogram and ultrasound they said it was cysts and calcification, so all good.
Got letter today outlining results and it said:
“Saw the this delightful lady in clinic today”......etc etc
I find this language unprofessional and it pissed me off that it was shitty code like a child’s school report.
I have to write reports for EHCPs and use appropriate professional language do it set me on edge.
Am I being precious?

"and rich enough"???

What on earth does money have to do with any of this?

Social and intellectual equal? Which is what exactly??

Sorry but this post is completely bonkers

@BarbaraofSeville

Sorry, but that's dreadful. Not professional at all. Reports on this sort of thing should be factual and medical. I do wonder if they would write in a similar manner about a man who was having tests for testicular cancer?

They do (well not testicular cancer I've never been tested for that but about virtually every test result no matter how serious the thing they are testing for).

Gorblimey. Some people can’t recognise a compliment for what it is. There are truly more important things to be wound up about

Wow some people like to complain! I got called a feisty patient once by a dr im usually refered to as anxious young lady as well. And no its not a female thing. Men get the exact same. Just enjoy your good news and be happy.

I was described as ‘an obese lady’. I could hardly take offence as it’s true.

Ohtheroses - personally I don't see it that way. I don't mind being called delightful, I don't mind being called sweetheart by a nurse. And the doctor using my first name as I call them "doctor" obviously doesn't mean they don't think I am their equal, or that they have a lack of respect for me. I think it's a bit of a reach to interpret it that way, but how we interpret things is based on our own life experiences etc so as I said before - everyone is different!

I think it's a good way to get your patient onside, in these times of litigation, I would feel pleased if a doc called me that. Starts the relationship off on the right foot (from the doc's point of view).

For men they often write "Pleasant gentleman" or "Nice young man". Stuff like that.

I had copy of a letter from the Breast Clinic - started with the usual 'pleasant lady' blah blah. A bit later on it mentioned 'overweight' and 'heavy drinker'. We decided that was code for me being a fat alky.

I'm not actually a heavy drinker - I do go over the 14 units a week, but rarely more than 20.

@duletty

I’m 44, had breastfeeding pain for a few months and then found a large lump on the underside of my arm near arm pit. Gp arranged a quick appointment (was three weeks when usually a two week wait).... Any way after mammogram and ultrasound they said it was cysts and calcification, so all good. Got letter today outlining results and it said: “Saw the this delightful lady in clinic today”......etc etc I find this language unprofessional and it pissed me off that it was shitty code like a child’s school report. I have to write reports for EHCPs and use appropriate professional language do it set me on edge. Am I being precious?

I knew this is what your thread would be about.

It’s not unprofessional, it’s actually complimentary, as has been explained upthread.

Yes, they do.

Focus on the bigger picture...... You don't have breast cancer!! That must be a relief regardless of how it is written. Many women would not have such good news.

It is fairly standard, although I see your point.

That is literally what consultants write. I'm a nurse. They're all like that.

That is literally what consultants write. I'm a nurse. They're all like that.

Yes, but why?

absolutely!

I have a job that involves reviewing medical reports and you see this all the time, for men and women. It’s a bit old fashioned, but I suppose it makes the letters seem a bit more personal and polite.

Most referral letters are now written this way. Started when we started to get copies of them.

I am at the bar and would be disciplined/raised eyebrows/spoken to (and I am senior) etc in almost all circumstances I can think of if I used those types of phrases/words in writing to or about a client - it would be highly unprofessional.
I remember when I first saw ‘delightful’ i stared at it for ages and wondered if it were some kind of medical profession code.
Still find it unecessary, slightly infantilising the relationship but not objectionable. Think it might help many patients ?

Takes me back to the days when I would have been so relieved to be described like this because I recognised it as code for "normal, not a weirdo, you don't have to mistrust everything she says".

What got me worried was "Mother is very anxious" as I knew perfectly well that was code for "Don't worry, you don't have to do any further tests, it's just a hysterical woman being precious about her child, better keep an eye on her for Munchausen by Proxy though".

I have been seriously depressed since my breast cancer diagnosis and have often sat infront of my oncology consultant looking like death warmed up / stunned / in my worst clothing - although he has commented on it verbally to me I am genuinely relieved he has not referred to it in one of the millions of NHS letters I have received

Jesus wept, just be thankful you're alright and get on with your life.

Still find it unecessary, slightly infantilising the relationship but not objectionable

But its not infantilising at all. Its in no way making the patient seem like a child. It is merely a compliment to make the letter seem more personal and less us (medical professionals) and them (patient).

my oncology nurse used to call me sweetheart when I went for chemo and I really liked it, it made something deeply horrible that tiny bit more bearable

I would happily take "this miserable ugly cow" in a letter from a consultant if the rest of the letter said I did not have cancer.....

But its not infantilising at all. Its in no way making the patient seem like a child. It is merely a compliment to make the letter seem more personal and less us (medical professionals) and them (patient).

But can you accept that for many patients it has the opposite effect? Makes them wonder why their doctor feels that it’s part of their job to let another doctor know their view of the individual’s personality and/or demeanour?

I mean let’s be honest - it’s not unlike a school report card with a teacher trying to show they have noticed the child as an individual.

I mean it’s minor and I wouldn’t dream of complaining about it, but it’s fucking weird that doctors think it’s professional or necessary.