To find my report from breast clinic condescending?

[duletty]

I’m 44, had breastfeeding pain for a few months and then found a large lump on the underside of my arm near arm pit.
Gp arranged a quick appointment (was three weeks when usually a two week wait)....
Any way after mammogram and ultrasound they said it was cysts and calcification, so all good.
Got letter today outlining results and it said:
“Saw the this delightful lady in clinic today”......etc etc
I find this language unprofessional and it pissed me off that it was shitty code like a child’s school report.
I have to write reports for EHCPs and use appropriate professional language do it set me on edge.
Am I being precious?

Delightful, pleasant, rather splendid, stoical, rather anxious, very anxious

All standard phrases

I'd expect him to call me Mrs Roses and not to use my surname.

How can he call you Mrs Roses without using your surname? Are you actually Mrs Carnations?

I was once described as being a great historian! I was thinking WTF?
Turns out it meant that I could easily dictate the history of my illness!

Oh purrleease! I'd love to be called delightful! Stop clutching your pearls and get on with your life delighted at your healthy boobies

When i was at university training this is how we were told to write letters. You always start by thanking the GP or whoever for referring this pleasant lady/gentleman. Its just standard.

@BarbaraofSeville

Sorry, but that's dreadful. Not professional at all. Reports on this sort of thing should be factual and medical. I do wonder if they would write in a similar manner about a man who was having tests for testicular cancer?

Certainly normal ime. Men or women

I would like to be addressed as a "delightful" person. In an often unpleasant and hostile world, that sounds ...delightful.

I’m a doctor and I do confess I say delightful lady ( in obstetrics) when I meet a particularly pleasant patient and it generally means you are lucky as a GP you have such a nice person on your books makes sure you are nice to her and give her anything she wants .

Seriously. Get a grip, you just got the news you DONT have cancer. Someone needs a harsh dose of reality!

All my hospital letters are basically exactly like this... Just seems standard to me. No big deal.

I've had letters copied to me like that, in one I was a 'pleasant lady'. Not worth getting aerated about! At least they didn't put "NFN"!

The first time I had breast cancer I had a mastectomy and silicone reconstruction. The second time chemo and radiotherapy. At the assessment for the latter the female Radiology consultant’s report contained such gems as: “she continues to do triathlons and is totally FIT” (for a while I thought it was some medical acronym) and “her reconstruction is beautiful”. It was stunningly inappropriate but made me laugh in a time when I felt rather vulnerable. It was a good job she was a woman, I had been warned she was an odd character but excellent doctor.

They always do that. I quite like it personally.

I feel quite insulted when they don’t say I’m lovely.

Oh I thought I was a delightful lady 😕

Think you should just be relieved your results were good news & stop worrying about trivial things. I wouldn’t be offended by this at all, it’s just polite.

I'm actually going through the exact same thing although my ultrasound is Wednesday. In my letter from the consult he called me pleasant, I found it funny and slightly charming - definitely not unprofessional. If this is all you have to worry about then be glad, and get over yourself at the time.

Doctor code to let them know you aren’t a twat
Basically this. I have been under hospitals all my life and worked at a GP surgery. This is very very standard language in most letters and for both men and women (although the lady part is obviously changed). I would be more offended if I got a letter without that to be honest lol

Yep as above, I write referrals and always start with "this lovely gentleman" "delightful woman" etc. Its standard

Very common, and I don't think they mean to be condescending, but it kind of does raise my hackles a bit.

I feel like the subtext is "take good care of her because she's nice" when I think they should take equally good care of people who aren't nice.

I rarely comment on these things but had to laugh at the post where PP thought being referred to as a GPs wife was code for “don’t fuck up”.
It really isn’t code for “don’t fuck up”. It’s code for “this one comes thinking they know more than the average patient”. Also, it’s not a case of the DH “Not knowing much more” than her neurologist, he will know significantLy less than a neurologist. This is why she was referred to a neurologist rather than her own GP managing the condition.

OP, it really is normal and there are bigger things to worry about. Glad you had a good result from your mammogram

Oh for goodness sake another from the PC brigade. Get over it as a pp said at least it was good news. All of my hospital letters start like this, I hope I'm always polite, as I do strive to be.
I'm fed up of being offended by people who are offended about every bloody thing. ☹️

Oooh, I got one, I got one today! A hospital consultant wrote to my GP and sent me a copy, and I'm apparently a 'pleasant lady'.

Given the context, I rather hope it's consultant-speak for, 'Yes, she did need the referral actually and yes she does have the significant problems she's been telling you about for ages and wasn't making it all up'.

But who knows.

@emodi

I’m a doctor and I do confess I say delightful lady ( in obstetrics) when I meet a particularly pleasant patient and it generally means you are lucky as a GP you have such a nice person on your books makes sure you are nice to her and give her anything she wants .

Absolutely, when I write lovely, delightful etc it’s because they genuinely were and I want the GP to know they were as well :)

Every medical letter I have received says how delightful I am? Well I must say I don't feel so precious now. Seriously I did wonder what I did that was delightful.