Do many people think that ADHD is not real?

[Ilovecranberries]

Was having remote drinks with a friend and his wife yesterday. She's a secondary school teacher in a quite "rough" school (not in the UK). I was quite surprised when, discussing something quite abstract about how different people think and react differently, she had said quite breezily that the majority of teachers she knows "don't believe" in the existence of ADHD.
Incidentally, one of my children is currently being assessed for it, but it is not news that I had shared socially outside of my immediate family. I wasn't offended, but I wonder if it is actually a widespread view behind the closed doors?

Some parents know how to play the system

Then those parents are genius. Because most people with kids with additional needs can get fuck all out of the system.

There is also massive issue with under diagnosis. Especially with inattentive ADHD. I have recently been diagnosed with this in my 40s. I was just thought of as lazy and disorganised at school.

I also haven't really told anyone yet about my diagnosis. I think ADHD is massively misunderstood and also carries quite a stigma.

I think many of my friends would say "oh but I do that..." and I haven't told work yet but am going to have to as my symptoms are worsening and I have been making mistakes.

@mistyrivers87

NC'd for this because I know I'll get flamed and chased down with pitchforks.

I think ADHD is a load of bollocks. It does not exist. It was a term concocted to deflect the blame from parents when they've got a naughty child. No parent wants to admit they've failed in their discipline, they'd rather place a label on it. ADHD is a fantasy of a condition. People need to simply realise they've lost their way with their discipline.
I have two children myself and yes they are naughty and yes I am not perfect by any means and yes I'd love to say that when my son kicks off that he simply has ADHD as it would reassure me that I haven't slipped up somewhere. But no, I take responsibility for my child's actions and refuse to blame an imaginary illness.

Case in point. I was quite happy to accept it was my parenting style! It turns out it was in part but that was because DS needs a different parenting style.

He is not a badly behaved kid at all - he just can't concentrate. He's also bright which means he can cover it easily in class - it only really came out when we moved to remote learning and he couldn't take cues on what he should be doing from his classmates.

@FourPlasticRings

I believe in it but think it's sometimes wrongly diagnosed. Diagnosis is more prevalent in summer born children, suggesting that sometimes kids judged by the yardstick of children older than them get mislabelled as having ADHD, when in fact they're just young.

I've never seen a correlation to age and diagnosis

I have met people who thinks it’s a load of bollocks, including teachers. I 100% believe it ADHD to be real and have met a number of people with it. The problem is some people via the route of “Dr Google” like to claim their child has is, minus any professional diagnosis

I've worked with teachers for over 20 years and I've never met one who doesn't believe ADHD is real.

I actually don't believe this woman at all.

DH definitely has it as well (not diagnosed) and has all the resultant issues from not having support early enough.

DS3 was DX with ASD age 4. (When we first had concerns about him it was ADHDl. He was DX by way of multi-disciplinary assessment including ADOS

His old school raised ADHD with me in Yr2. He now has ADHD dx

He wouldn't have got the DX without the information on the school AND parent questionnaire.
The school scores were higher than mine.
Does anyone think their scores were higher because their teaching was poor? I'm thinking poor parenting would still be blamed.

The school were very keen for us to explore medication but we're not going there yet.

Not only does it exist children do not grow out of it. And to have it as an adult can be a nightmare. If you have it there is zero point in telling anyone apart from a doctor because they will not understand it and will make judgements like - 'usually associated with lower socioeconomic groups'

Plenty of successful people have it but have learnt to hide it and have outgrown the hyperactivity. I could say to people without it that they are slow on the uptake. Why can't they read faster? Why do their brains work so slowly? Sure if they just tried they could think faster. And why are they so scared of everything? But that would be invalidating and shitty.

If you have good parents you will be fine. If you are brought up within a good moral framework (ADHD is not about having poor morals in fact most with it have a very strong sense of fairness and wanting things to be fair for others) and plenty of love then its an awful lot easier.

I fully believe ADHD exists, I have seen many proven cases myself in my career. I have seen children flourish with the appropriate therapy, support and plans in place.

The problem is I’ve also seen it as an excuse for bad behaviour. Child doesn’t do as they’re told, parents jump and say it “must be ADHD”. But ADHD isn’t about bad behaviour.

It’s sadly become a condition that parents try and get diagnosed as a way to “pass the buck” when their child needs nothing more than discipline.

It also gets a bad rap when, in genuine cases, everything a child does is brushed off as “that’s the ADHD” - when again, a child with ADHD can and should still respond to discipline.

(By discipline btw I don’t mean harsh punishments I’m using it as a general term and just giving children practical and sensible boundaries and understanding consequences)

I have inattentive ADHD and it's horribly real, but teachers didn't have much awareness when I was at school and I was punished while I struggled, even my parents thought adhd was a label to excuse poor behaviour.
Thankfully I think more people are becoming aware of it but there's still very little understanding and I hear a lot of unkind jokes about it.
I've always said you need thick skin to live with it.

she had said quite breezily that the majority of teachers she knows "don't believe" in the existence of ADHD.

Maybe that's true, maybe that isn't. It changes nothing for me. I have a son with a diagnosis of ADHD (among others) and when he was willing to take medication, oh, the difference... People who want to tell me his condition doesn't exist and if I was stricter and put in boundaries and banned TV and anything other than organic whole foods and so on can say what they please, but I'm not going to listen to them because they are talking rubbish.

ADHD is part of the autistic spectrum in the same way that Asperger's Syndrome is.

Erm. Nope.

That’s a terrible view if she’s a teacher!

Many people are naive and don’t believe it exists. I guess I used to be similar until I had my son. He’s been diagnosed with autism and being assessed for adhd. It definitely does exist!

However, I do believe it can be used in the wrong way. For instance I have a friend who has a young son. He hasn’t even seen anyone but she’s self diagnosed him with adhd. Maybe he does have it. I am aware that diagnosis can take a long time but she literally has not had one single professional opinion. She uses for sympathy and excuses too.

@mistyrivers87 ADHD isn't about being naughty or not. It can also explain positive behaviours. Being hyperfocused and incredibly intelligent in some areas. Also behaviours that are neither good or bad, for example a need to continuously fiddle with something.

I don't blame you for not understanding. It is what society has taught people. Society really needs to educate people on the reality of neurodevelopmental conditions. If people can understand that adjustments need to be made for people in wheelchairs then there is no reason they can't learn that people with brains wired differently can be just as capable if reasonable adjustments are made for them.

I'm a primary teacher and I definitely believe ADHD and ADD exist. The issue is that so many children who have poor behaviour, often due to poor parenting, get labelled as having it as well. This is why some people don't think it's real. A few years ago it seemed like lots of children were getting diagnosed with it, we see less diagnosis of it in schools these days.

I am with mistyrivers here. I was at Junior school in the late 1950s and believe me, no child ever misbehaved twice! Having said that, there used to be 'special schools' for children with SEN, which have all but disappeared today. I too often wonder why it is that so many children nowadays have diagnosed conditions.

@mistyrivers87 ODFOD.

The symptoms of ADHD were recognised and documented by the Greeks, centuries ago. It has been a recognised as a condition affecting impulse control since 1902 and was formally recognised as a disorder in 1968. That's 51 years ago. Hardly that modern. Keep your ignorant and offensive views to yourself.

I strongly suspect that Dd1 and 1 both have ADD and ASD. Minds like kaleidoscopes that never switch off along with a myriad of other issues. Mine has got worse over the years. I was a well behaved child so nothing to do with being naughty.

It probably is no more prevalent now than any time before. We just diagnose more conditions as science learns more.

A generation or three ago inattentive girls were simply scatterbrains and badly behaved boys were tearaways!

We know more now, we can do more to remove those negative labels and offer coping strategies.

@Iwalkinmyclothing
Do you find that people often are telling you that? I mean, about organic food and TV?
Asking for own understanding / preparedness only. I really do not cope well with the social judgment.