Do many people think that ADHD is not real?

[Ilovecranberries]

Was having remote drinks with a friend and his wife yesterday. She's a secondary school teacher in a quite "rough" school (not in the UK). I was quite surprised when, discussing something quite abstract about how different people think and react differently, she had said quite breezily that the majority of teachers she knows "don't believe" in the existence of ADHD.
Incidentally, one of my children is currently being assessed for it, but it is not news that I had shared socially outside of my immediate family. I wasn't offended, but I wonder if it is actually a widespread view behind the closed doors?

@Thateverlastingyes77 let's say you're right(you're not btw) what's the end game here?

Why would parents lie, have their child lie and act out to "play the system "?

For what?

A diagnosis that brings a lot of stigma,eye rolling and often stupid "advice"?

Do you honestly believe that parents that are neglectful or not interested spend months and sometimes years gathering evidence , going to appts and assessments, going to parenting classes and everything else that getting a diagnosis entails?

Are schools in on this master plan?

I always find it ironic when people equate can't be arsed parents with a diagnosis of ASD or ADHD, because the level of time,effort and tears that goes into getting one is so high.

I think its real but I also think some parents want to get their kids diagnosed when they parent poorly and use it as an excuse.
I had a friend who used to think her son had adhd, he would hit and kick and punch other children in front of her and she wouldnt do anything or even react, he would also start fights with her other child and I have to say I have never seen siblings physically fight so violently at only 6 and 7 it was horrible to watch, she would say 'oh its just boys being boys'

Unfortunately the end game for some people is more benefits and you can say it doesn’t happen but believe me it does! I’m not saying your child or others on here don’t have it but I know people who have dragged their kids up terribly and the behaviour has been terrible and lo and behold the have adhd!

Benefits... right.

I'm fucking coining it in over here having won the Disabled Kid Lottery twice. It's wall to wall moneybags and we all wipe our noses with twenties

To get the disabled child element on Tax Credits/Universal Credit you need to be in receipt of DLA. You don't actually need a diagnosis to get DLA but the eligibility criteria is very strict and you must provide thorough evidence of your child's needs, how it affects their day to day life, what support they require, and what happens if they don't get that support. To have that evidence you have to have input from professionals such as assessment reports, observations, supporting statements, etc. You don't just rock up to the DWP with your hand out and get it awarded.

@Thateverlastingyes77 TBH it's not really relevant to this thread. They are two totally different things.

If you read a few pages of it you might understand. It's not just 'special needs children' it's adults who have it, and their parents, and a whole condition that's got bugger sll to do with chavvy parents screaming at their kids.

Plenty of fat people claim thyroid conditions, people cheat on their insurance, and pretend to be sick when they are lazy or greedy. If you're sick or have a thyroid condition you don't expect to be told it doesn't really exist because some people make it up - yet that's what people are saying in effect.

It's always the ooo I believe in it but what about...

25 fucking pages of people that have worked in schools all saying 'it's the parents fault' followed by dozens of examples of that not being the case.

I admit that I do believe sometimes ADHD can be exacerbated due to parenting or the situation at home(particularly when one parent fight the diagnosis and refuses to acknowledge the needs of the child) that doesn't mean the diagnosis is not right.

I also know that conditions like ADHD or ASD can also be exacerbated by peer or even teaching staff behaviour.

It's expected in a way as such conditions are highly impacted by outside factors like sensory difficulties for example.

If anything, assuming it's parenting is the lazy way out(you don't have to acknowledge it, make any changes to your thinking, experience, knowledge,behaviour you don't have to bother to understand or learn how you can help etc) , not a parent trying to get a diagnosis,help and support for their child.

I'll admit I was uneducated in this respect and have in the past thought it's just made up by some people who simply can't discipline their children. Like a lazy parents excuse.

I'll admit to that.

But reading threads have my DS in school with friends with ADHD I've learnt and changed my opinion.

I think the media do somewhat paint the bias and the picture towards blaming parents.

I'm pretty sure i went undiagnosed all through school with ADHD or autism. Not sure which.

@Warsawa31

It’s a proven medical condition where the limbic system is Under active - so the emotional regulation that most of us experience isn’t present. Hence why they give Ritalin - a stimulant - as medicine to try and engage that part of the brain.

Are people mis diagnosed ? Of course, but the condition itself has been neurologically proven to exist so I don’t see the argument for it not existing !

This

My son has adhd
Perhaps the pp who thinks it’s a way of getting benefits would let us into the secret as I’ve never heard of any adhd related benefits

It’s real And no It’s not due to rubbish parenting
I think it’s just a poor set of genes the kids inherit

there isn't just one presentation of ADD though. There is a hyperactive type and an inattentive type. Also the hyperactive type may not be violent or screamy. I knew someone as an adult who was diagnosed ADH D as a child and medicated but with him it manifested as not being aware of danger and being impulsive . Very sweet natured, father was a vicar. A nice young man but a bit crazy

Sorry, I didn't intend the word crazy to be offensive. I myself am neurodiverse and quite often use that word for myself but looking back and can see some might be upset by it

My son has ADHD and autism that doesn't mean he can misbehave or be rude (obvs can sometimes but no excuse in my book and he knows what behaviours acceptable)

@Soontobe60

I was researching something and found your post.

You said "Senco here. Of course it exists, for different causes. Early childhood trauma, inadequate parenting, ASD can all be linked to ADHD. It often runs in families, especially when the cause is childhood trauma/ parenting as all siblings within the family will probably be subjected to this too.
IME, medication has a limited effect on some children if it's as a result of trauma or parenting, unless the parenting changes significantly. The meds just temporarily mute their behaviours for a short time. I've only seen a small handful of students respond positively to meds, and they also had a diagnosis of ASD with very supportive families. The crucial thing to understand is that meds arentbthe solution, a complete change in approach to supporting students with ADHD is needed. Schools that tend to be one size fits all places struggle to deal with challenging behaviours whereas those with a more holistic approach are more effective."

It exists for different causes? What do you mean by this? Further,
ADHD is not caused by childhood trauma or part of the ASD spectrum. If you are a SENCO please ensure you provide accurate information on a public forum whilst quoting your apparent authority.

ADHD is likely hereditary. HOWEVER, it is correlated with chaotic childhoods and trauma, due to the lack of dopamine making the individual more predisposed to risky behaviors, alcohol and drug addiction. This means that the undiagnosed parent will potentially be exposing a child to some trauma due to their condition which they have passed on via their genes. Its not caused by trauma. Trauma is NOT known to cause ADHD, but possibly worsen ADHD symptoms or have an asmilie with the symptoms.

You also know very little about medication. Medication does help some people but can be shortlived in effectiveness without breaks or other medication provided, for example the body and brain becomes used to it. Further some medications can deplete other chemicals in the brain which further impact the individual.

I'd really suggest you don't post again regarding subjects you have little knowledge of, and far too much judgment. Thank you.

I am really shocked by the number of people here saying ADHD is related to bad parenting, not real etc. These are is ignorant statements . People, do your research!
ADHD is a real neurodevelopmental condition of receptors in the brain which does not function properly. It's a type of disability from the kind you can't see from the outside.
I have two DC. One is diagnosed with ADHD and struggles generally, the other is completely normal, star student, super happy child! Same parenting throughout.
We are loving, warm and a very tight family. We dedicate ourselves to their happiness and well being in every sense. Our concern to our ADHD DC is immense and we are doing everything we possibly can to support DC and learn strategies together to manage this condition. DC is super smart, talented and a very popular child, his brain is just poorly wired, but oddly that create a unique and interesting mind and personality. He is different in a very cool way.
No one know exactly what cause this, like many other conditions in the human body. It runs in families so there is definitely a gene responsible, not trauma! Like with many underlying conditions, trauma can trig the condition or make it worse, but not always.
ADHD can be managed pretty well with the right medication and a lot of mental support. The medication make the cells able to bind with the chemicals passing between neurone, which transmit information, in a very simplistic form. That's why people with ADHD struggle to process info and their brain is a soup of chemicals that not ending up where they should! It's pretty simple science in that sense.
We spent years, still do, investing in the best Drs and therapist to get a proper diagnosis and treatment. We spent ££££ amounts and compromised lifestyle. I don't consider this as bad parenting! All my husband and I want is the best for DC and to reduce anxiety. It's not easy but we are not giving up. This is parents love.

@shivanamatta

I am really shocked by the number of people here saying ADHD is related to bad parenting, not real etc. These are is ignorant statements . People, do your research! ADHD is a real neurodevelopmental condition of receptors in the brain which does not function properly. It's a type of disability from the kind you can't see from the outside. I have two DC. One is diagnosed with ADHD and struggles generally, the other is completely normal, star student, super happy child! Same parenting throughout. We are loving, warm and a very tight family. We dedicate ourselves to their happiness and well being in every sense. Our concern to our ADHD DC is immense and we are doing everything we possibly can to support DC and learn strategies together to manage this condition. DC is super smart, talented and a very popular child, his brain is just poorly wired, but oddly that create a unique and interesting mind and personality. He is different in a very cool way. No one know exactly what cause this, like many other conditions in the human body. It runs in families so there is definitely a gene responsible, not trauma! Like with many underlying conditions, trauma can trig the condition or make it worse, but not always. ADHD can be managed pretty well with the right medication and a lot of mental support. The medication make the cells able to bind with the chemicals passing between neurone, which transmit information, in a very simplistic form. That's why people with ADHD struggle to process info and their brain is a soup of chemicals that not ending up where they should! It's pretty simple science in that sense. We spent years, still do, investing in the best Drs and therapist to get a proper diagnosis and treatment. We spent ££££ amounts and compromised lifestyle. I don't consider this as bad parenting! All my husband and I want is the best for DC and to reduce anxiety. It's not easy but we are not giving up. This is parents love.

Here here! Best of luck to you! ADHD isn’t necessarily a negative as you’ve recognised being close to it. Is your unaffected child a girl and your affected child a boy? I only ask as I have experience of it presenting differently and impacting later. Good luck to you. Your children sound very luck to have you as a parent.

I’ve recently been diagnosed with adhd - just for the record it is NOT apart of the autism spectrum as i have read someone say on here. Adhd and autism SHARE SIMILARITIES but that is all.

It’s absurd that we still believe that these things don’t exist simply because we cannot SEE them, or luckily for some, that they do not experience these symptoms themselves and therefore it’s fake. An extremely narrow minded viewpoint.

I have ADHD, and work in child protection. ADHD is virtually indistinguishable from developmental trauma, in young children, in some presentations. Diagnosis in psychiatry is by no means infallible, and in many opinions diagnosis is biased by cultural and social factors. There are huge amounts of children in the US diagnosed with bipolar, virtually none in the UK- not because we are so different but because the culture of diagnosis is different. There are parents who seek to excuse poor parenting with a medical issue- because if you are a poor parent, mostly they are ashamed and dont wan't to be, and externalising the problem means not having to face it. There also parents who are not abusive, or even just struggling, who have severely disabled children. Its not as easy differentiating as people might think.

I’m a teacher and say that of course it’s real. What I do dispute though is when I hear people saying things like ‘my child can’t sit still for that long because of ADHD’, ‘my child can’t do this work because of ADHD’. No doubt they find listening and concentrating and sitting still harder than others, often a lot harder and from time to time it is too difficult - but that doesn’t simply mean ‘can’t’. I think it’s actually massively under-diagnosed though.

Teacher here. Of course it's real. I've taught plenty of naughty kids and some kids with ADHD. Not the same thing. The most recent student I taught with ADHD, at a private school, was quite an extreme case. 14, lovely boy, intelligent, very nice, supportive, non-chaotic family. It was obvious how hard it was for him to sit at all still, concentrate etc, and totally obvious that he couldn't control it and didn't want to be behaving the way he was.

Bit late to the party here but this thread was interesting. It’s helpful to see how people think about this, even when it’s misguided.

I really hope we can continue to spread awareness and understanding about ADHD, especially when it comes to women and girls who are particularly underserved.

I have a diagnosis but have recently met myths and misunderstanding from family, internet randoms and even my extremely caring and lovely GP. It’s clear that a lot of people just don’t know much about this condition at all and we need to change that.

I wish I had known something about it sooner, beyond just basic stereotypes, and then maybe I could have had help sooner. Still jumping through hoops for any actual help of course because of hideous waiting lists.

I send lots of solidarity to everyone affected by this, whether themselves, their child or someone else. It’s very hard but also, what an amazing group of people you are.

In my country, ADHD is diagnosed across one or more of 3 categories - hyperactive , inattentive and impulsive.

My 7 year old, who is an enganging, polite and well behaved child (the school's words when asked to give a report as part of a diagnosis, not mine), struggles like mad to sit still and concentrate. She performs a bit above the average at school, but could do so much better if she did not have ADHD. She is sensory seeking and a bit impulsive, which causes issues with friendships. All of this makes her sad. She desperately wants to be 'good' and for people to like her.

These issues exist even though she is well behaved. ADHD is not necessarily related to naughtiness.

@mistyrivers87 you are just wrong, sorry.