Page 3 | Loads of mean threads!

PattyCake45 · 2020-07-19T17:01:34+00:00

Is it just me or has there been a disproportionate amount of really nasty threads recently? Not going into detail as it's TAAT but there's been a fair few where comments have immediately descended into attacking OPs, mocking them or offering sarcastic and unhelpful replies. Some of it has been quite upsetting to be honest. I know MN is famed for its no nonsense nature but a lot of what I've seen has been sheer nastiness. What's going on? Has everyone just reached the end of their tether with lockdown? PS I'm braced and ready for this one to go the same way [grin]

Cassilis · 21/07/2020 08:13

I don’t think name change functionality should be removed.

I have had people check my posting history and then comment on my opinions about unrelated subjects. I use AS myself sometimes but don’t use it against an OP in that way.

GinDaddyRedux · 21/07/2020 08:16

@Winterwoollies

I agree *@PattyCake45*. Yesterday I tried to defend a poster who was looking for support with getting a TV out of a guest-room-come- nursery and people lynched her over the size of the tv, why she owned more than one tv, why she owned a tv at all, they decided her priorities were all wrong, that she watched too much tv and that it was weird that she had guests to stay in her house who occasionally watched tv in the guest room.

The dogged determination of some posters to be total cunts was fairly depressing. But it does only reflect on them and their small lives if they get their jollies from being mean to people on the internet.

I remember that post too.

It is very typical of this board. Lots of people scanning the OP's post looking for something to beat them with, anything that will make them feel smaller, make them feel stupid, make them feel common, etc.

Few people actually looking at the OP's post and analysing the dilemna they've posed.

AIBU is all about being mean. And like I said, Mumsnet HQ absolutely loves it, because the advertisers are getting serious eyeballs.

Sometimeswinning · 21/07/2020 08:22

Yep! Today a thread has been pulled because of people having zero empathy and pushing their own agenda. Even mumsnet apologised to the op for the goady idiots!

excuseforfights · 21/07/2020 08:30

@Winterwoollies

I agree *@PattyCake45*. Yesterday I tried to defend a poster who was looking for support with getting a TV out of a guest-room-come- nursery and people lynched her over the size of the tv, why she owned more than one tv, why she owned a tv at all, they decided her priorities were all wrong, that she watched too much tv and that it was weird that she had guests to stay in her house who occasionally watched tv in the guest room.

The dogged determination of some posters to be total cunts was fairly depressing. But it does only reflect on them and their small lives if they get their jollies from being mean to people on the internet.

@Winterwoollies

I’ve just read that thread and no, the OP wasn’t ‘lynched’, and there were no ‘total cunts’.

There was a hilarious assumption that the OP was placing too much ‘value’ on TV and also someone asked why they had two TVs but the OP challenged that herself robustly and even used the grin emoji.

This is why I take these threads with a pinch of salt. If the nursery thread is an example of a ‘lynching’ then people have very different ideas of what nasty is.

And the OP wasn’t looking for ‘support’! She wanted to move the TV, her husband wanted to keep it, she was hardly being abused! 😂

eaglejulesk · 21/07/2020 08:45

Jeebus this, again. If you can't cope with the Internet then go play elsewhere. Women don't owe you kindness.

I don't believe the OP was looking for kindness for herself, just stating the very true fact that there have been some very unpleasant posters on MN lately. It's not always directed at the OPs either.

Incidentally - who do women owe kindness to? I thought being kind was something most of us tried to achieve - obviously not. I also didn't realise that the Internet was invented solely so people could show off their unpleasant side - silly me.

Roussette · 21/07/2020 08:48

Incidentally - who do women owe kindness to? I thought being kind was something most of us tried to achieve - obviously not

Totally agree. Personally I like to be kind to my fellow human beings, male and female.

SharonasCorona · 21/07/2020 08:48

I don't believe the OP was looking for kindness for herself, just stating the very true fact that there have been some very unpleasant posters on MN lately. It's not always directed at the OPs either.

Whilst conveniently hiding her own posting history...

Ballybeyondthepail · 21/07/2020 08:49

Start a new positive one then, rather than another one that has people moaning???
You're part of the problem OP.

SharonasCorona · 21/07/2020 08:51

Incidentally - who do women owe kindness to? I thought being kind was something most of us tried to achieve - obviously not. I also didn't realise that the Internet was invented solely so people could show off their unpleasant side - silly me.

I think the point is that society expects women to be nice all the time. Of course that doesn’t mean women should be dicks but the ‘be kind’ message is tedious and patronising. And often delivered by people who are far from nice themselves. Not saying the OP isn’t nice, but I have seen this on other threads.

Winterwoollies · 21/07/2020 08:52

@excuseforfights 🙄

excuseforfights · 21/07/2020 08:57

@Winterwoollies if you disagree, instead of eye rolling, when not quote the comments from the total cunts that lynched the OP?

MysteriesOfTheOrganism · 21/07/2020 08:59

I think society in general has become nastier over the past few years and it's a trend I can only see continuing. It's sad.

SchrodingersImmigrant · 21/07/2020 09:03

@Sometimeswinning

Yep! Today a thread has been pulled because of people having zero empathy and pushing their own agenda. Even mumsnet apologised to the op for the goady idiots!

Which one was it? I've never saw MNHQ apologise for posters

Winterwoollies · 21/07/2020 09:03

@excuseforfights because I’m not being drawn in. Your name speaks volumes, you’re proving the OP’s point and you’ve already linked to the thread so people can read if they like... so again, 🙄.

SchrodingersImmigrant · 21/07/2020 09:03

*seen dang it

YouBringLightInToADarkPlace · 21/07/2020 09:09

I agree OP, a post can have 80% sensible, reasonable information on it and the 20% will immediately be jumped upon by others having an over-inflated go over something silly.

As PP have said, AIBU is always savage but just at the moment seems particularly brutal.

excuseforfights · 21/07/2020 09:10

@Winterwoollies

@excuseforfights because I’m not being drawn in. Your name speaks volumes, you’re proving the OP’s point and you’ve already linked to the thread so people can read if they like... so again, 🙄.

Can you explain how I’m proving the OP’s point? What have I said that is nasty?

And my username was chosen because my abusive husband was looking for looking for constant excuses to fight with me and be aggressive with me.

heartsonacake · 21/07/2020 09:13

YABU. If you are upset by words on a screen by random strangers the problem lies with you, not them.

SidesteppinTheRona · 21/07/2020 09:53

I agree, OP. I’ve been here for years and see it as a bit worse than it was a few years ago.

A new poster was asking for help a week or so ago. Her post was suggestive of PND. She came here, a supposed parents support forum and was roundly kicked in the teeth by several (not all) posters and reminded that the world didn’t revolve around her. It was horrible. She said she was off and wouldn’t be back.

There is no need to be horrible to people. None. Especially when they’re upset and asking for help.

SidesteppinTheRona · 21/07/2020 09:56

@heartsonacake

YABU. If you are upset by words on a screen by random strangers the problem lies with you, not them.

So you think being horrible to someone seeking help is OK, and anyone who thinks this is unacceptable is the one with the problem?

Bloody hell.

heartsonacake · 21/07/2020 10:01

So you think being horrible to someone seeking help is OK, and anyone who thinks this is unacceptable is the one with the problem?

SidesteppinTheRona No. I think anyone who gets upset over words on a screen is oversensitive and needs to address that and gain some resilience.

wildcherries · 21/07/2020 10:04

I think the point is that society expects women to be nice all the time. Of course that doesn’t mean women should be dicks but the ‘be kind’ message is tedious and patronising.

I agree. So sick of #bekind etc.

Some OPs are unpleasant and goady or entirely unreasonable and flounce or cite "privacy concerns" when told. That's tedious as well.

Jinglebellissimo · 21/07/2020 10:06

Regular name changer here too. I think the issue recently is that the attitude of Aibu has seeped into all boards which is brutal.

Viviennemary · 21/07/2020 10:07

I agree absolutrly with the comments on name changing.

Winterwoollies · 21/07/2020 10:08

Wowsers. I think the problem might lie with you @heartsonacake if you truly think like that. Crikey.