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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Hairdresser appointment. Was I being precious?

289 replies

LadyLindaT · 19/07/2020 14:20

My hairdresser is lovely, and I have been a client for over 30 years.
She offered me an appointment when they opened again on 4th July.
I wasn't in any rush, so I waited until this last week.
I asked in advance if there were any special instructions, e.g., whether I should wear a mask.
I knew that there would be no refreshments, magazines, etc., and I was not going to bring a coat or a handbag.
48 hours before, I got a generic email, which didn't sit right with me.
I was told that I couldn't bring my own bottle of water, and would not be allowed to use the toilet.
I am talking about an appointment which would take over 3 hours.
I cancelled, in good time, on the basis that I didn't feel comfortable with that.
I have been made to feel as if I were being awkward and difficult.
I can understand that a quick cut and blow dry might work this way, but, if you know that the work is going to take hours, shouldn't you factor in that people might want to use a loo?

OP posts:
DrFoxtrot · 19/07/2020 21:24

He might have been a general gynaecologist but it was 1998 and I can't remember his exact specialism.

PablosHoney · 19/07/2020 21:25

Imagine getting the shits, that would be a horrible experience. I can feel the cold sweat coming over me just to think of it

DrFoxtrot · 19/07/2020 21:30

This same gynaecologist recommended drying the pubic area with a cool hairdryer to ensure the area was properly air dried after a shower and not clammy Grin.

My main point was that expecting people to hold their urine for 3 hours is unrealistic for a lot of people.

DrFoxtrot · 19/07/2020 21:30

This same gynaecologist recommended drying the pubic area with a cool hairdryer to ensure the area was properly air dried after a shower and not clammy Grin.

My main point was that expecting people to hold their urine for 3 hours is unrealistic for a lot of people.

DrFoxtrot · 19/07/2020 21:31

Twice again Blush

ThePlantsitter · 19/07/2020 21:33

I can go ages without a wee but if someone told me I couldn't go I can guarantee my bladder would be making itself known 10 minutes later.

Runkle · 19/07/2020 21:33

We still haven't had what the 'feedback' was...

fatgirlslimmer · 19/07/2020 21:34

@DrFoxtrot

This same gynaecologist recommended drying the pubic area with a cool hairdryer to ensure the area was properly air dried after a shower and not clammy Grin.

My main point was that expecting people to hold their urine for 3 hours is unrealistic for a lot of people.

My midwife told me to do this after giving birth to dry stitches. It worked. The hairdryer, not the urine.
PablosHoney · 19/07/2020 21:34

Sounds like a perv 😆

PablosHoney · 19/07/2020 21:35

I had a perverted landlord once that moaned about us taking showers as ‘Having baths is more hygienic for girls as it cleans their privates properly’

Legoandloldolls · 19/07/2020 21:38

I have only used the loo once at the hairdressers but it's nice to know it's a option. My hairdresser is the same. No drinks, coats, no loo. PPE extra costs. I'm in no rush but I might break my treatments out. Go once for a brutal cut ( inches ofc rather than my normal trim) and then book again for a colour. It's more expensive of course but is that a option?

I can box dye and cut my own though as it's long with hardly any grey. I'm not sure it's worth the hassle for me

SerendipitySunshine · 19/07/2020 22:29

I've been going to my hairdresser for years. My cut and colour takes about three hours. I have never used their toilet!

Candyflosscookie · 19/07/2020 22:34

Op Yanbu about not being able to use the loo. They will lose customers.

YabalittleU to be sniffy about a generic email, they will have been bombarded with messages. A fab nails lady I know had over 300 messages on the actual day it was announced they could go back.

This thread has helped me ID some really unimaginative and ignorant posters though, so thanks for that. Grin

AdobeWanKenobi · 19/07/2020 22:52

@SerendipitySunshine

I've been going to my hairdresser for years. My cut and colour takes about three hours. I have never used their toilet!
Fascinating.
Elsewyre · 19/07/2020 22:53

@DrFoxtrot

This same gynaecologist recommended drying the pubic area with a cool hairdryer to ensure the area was properly air dried after a shower and not clammy Grin.

My main point was that expecting people to hold their urine for 3 hours is unrealistic for a lot of people.

So unfortunately for those people they will have to forgo the luxury of a 3 hour beauty treatment during a global pandemic. It's not unrealistic to expect some compromises have to be made.
HowLongCanICallitBabyWeight · 19/07/2020 23:13

I do love some of the snarky comments I've had since I posted this morning! All of those saying people are different you know, yes that was my point, lots on here up in arms because it's impossible to last that long, barbaric etc. I was just pointing out that wasn't the case for me and I don't think I know anyone in real life (elderly and specific health issues aside) who gets in such a froth about there not being a toilet available at all times.
There are lots of jobs, like mine, like a PP who is a teacher, where you can't nip off every half an hour for another drink and a toilet break. Therefore there must be plenty of customers fine to go the hairdresser without needing the toilets to be open. OP is well within her rights to cancel, hairdresser is within hers to not provide toilets at the moment.

DrFoxtrot · 19/07/2020 23:13

Therefore OP WNBU to cancel her appointment knowing she couldn't last for three hours...

DrFoxtrot · 19/07/2020 23:14

My post was to @Elsewyre

randolph78 · 19/07/2020 23:45

I do love some of the snarky comments I've had since I posted this morning! All of those saying people are different you know, yes that was my point, lots on here up in arms because it's impossible to last that long, barbaric etc. I was just pointing out that wasn't the case for me and I don't think I know anyone in real life (elderly and specific health issues aside) who gets in such a froth about there not being a toilet available at all times

Massively offensive so say people are 'getting in a froth' because they can't manage the appointment plus travel time without using a loo. Peeing yourself in public is something people are going to be quite animated by and insulting them in this way is just nasty. I'm not sure what the relevance of advertising your larger bladder was. Are you really saying that it's only people like you who should have access to some facilities? If so, I don't think I agree given that we seem to be able to share loos in other settings without too much worry - restaurants, pubs, hospitals for example.

Colom · 20/07/2020 00:39

Would you normally use the oiler during your hair appointments OP? I'm another one who has never been to the toilet in the hairdressers but if it's something you know you'll need to do them obviously YANBU. But if you never really need to and your gripe is mainly about the bottle of water then I do think it was a bit daft to cancel. Unless you have a medical condition a few hours without a drink is hardly a big deal?

Mostly I think you're crazy to cancel for any reason - I'm DYING to have my roots done and would gladly pee myself for a hairdresser appointment Grin

HannaYeah · 20/07/2020 01:17

So many older women I know have incontinence urinary issues. So it makes sense for a gyn to have knowledge and experience around the urinary health of women. Given the various parts involved, and the specific events we experience as women.

I’d be comfortable with taking advice about remaining healthy from a gyn during a routine appointment rather than waiting for a problem and seeing a urologist.

No one goes to a urologist for preventative medicine, do they?

AdoreTheBeach · 20/07/2020 04:01

Are all these people complaining about the loo issue not realising it’s not only about you but also about the people who work there and other customers?

It’s horrible that so many of us need the loo so often because of our various health issues. It’s totally understandable we’d need the loo

However, it’s totally understandable that during a pandemic that steps are needed to protect others from catching it (and thus spreading further)

If you can’t deal with the current protective measures for your health, the stylists and other customers, don’t go. Wait until the danger of the virus passes to get your hair done. After all, it’s getting your hair done. It’s not a life or death choice.

You can choose to either follow these precautions or not. You can choose to buy shop colour and donat home - or not colour

You can choose to wait to get a hair cut or choose to try to do it at home

It’s not going to kill you to wait - but the virus might. It also might kill your stylist or their gran or their partner or the customer after you.

Alternatively, find someone who comes to you and you can use your own loo.

user1481840227 · 20/07/2020 04:40

I always cut my own hair but I can see how people might need to go to the toilet if they are somewhere for 3 hours.

First of all there's the travel time to get there and the fact that people might drink something in advance if they know they won't be allowed a drink for hours.
Also again there's the travel time when you leave and have to go home.
It could end up being quite a bit longer than 3 hours overall.

Dozer · 20/07/2020 07:09

AdoreTheBeach PPs have stated that guidelines suggest opening toilets. Toilets seem unlikely to present any additional risks over and above the rest of salons. OP has said she’s fine to wait to have her hair dyed, or presumably to use another hairdresser offering a loo, but that when she cancelled the appointment her hairdresser responded negatively.

“I don’t know anyone in real life (elderly and specific health issues aside) who gets in such a froth about there not being a toilet available”. “Gets in a froth” is rude. Lots of people of every age, including many, many women with DC, have “specific health issues” with respect to continence.

KeepWashingThoseHands · 20/07/2020 07:30

@EinsteinaGogo

'Anyone different to me not worthy of a service?'

WTAF are you talking about? Are you suggesting hairdressers request completion of a medical survey just so they can assess whether someone has a health condition that means they would have to go to the loo within a 3 hr window.

Or maybe the OP has to also realise we're living in a global pandemic and if she did in actual fact have a medical problem could have raised it with her hairdresser of 30 years before reacting like she did.

Only on MN are people so entitled and dickish.