To be utterly exasperated with the ‘but she’s really friendly’ dog owners out there

[Flamingolingo]

You know the kind - the ones who holler after their bounding dog who barks and bows and jumps at you about how friendly they are.

I feel like since lockdown I’ve had multiple altercations with people and their marauding dogs. Especially either while out running or out with my small children who are terrified.

That’s not to say there aren’t loads of really responsible dog owners out there who do try and call their dog back/put it on the lead, but the few who make no attempt other than shout about their friendliness really get my goat. For clarity: we are mostly using city centre green space, that is quite busy, I think in a rural location it’s a little different.

So I guess my Aibu is about my being annoyed at people who assume everyone wants their ‘friendly’ dog to bound into their social space, and who make no attempt to call their dog back unless specifically asked to.

@LastTrainEast

My dog can run faster than me, and a lot longer, and needs to do so to remain fit. Pity you didn't think of that before you got it.

She did I imagine.

Yanbu

I'm terrified of dogs and my pet peeve is people seeing I'm clearly distressed and thinking they can help so bring their dogs over to help me 'cure' my phobia

'He's just a puppy' - said of a one year old Vizsla three times the size of my dog. This 'puppy' was off lead and bounced all over my dog who was in the lead.

I find if you politely ask these sorts of owners to call their dogs off they become very embarrassed, as it quickly becomes clear their dog has no recall.

Lola smiles

Honestly I think a breed that needs SO much fast running isnt really suited to being a domestic pet but more so a working dog eg on a farm etc where there aren't going to be lots of young children etc.

If dogs run up to people and start jumping on, barking at or chasing them, it is entirely the responsibility of the dog owner.

'Mass' dog ownership is a relatively new thing.

I grew up in the countryside where the only people who had dogs had land, pretty much, by and large. The dogs concerned were a bit scary to us kids but with owners who took no shit. No 'Aw, he's just being friendly'; nope, dog on instant recall; maybe more akin to working dogs?

Nowadays everyone has a dog, and the cult of the 'fur-baby' means many people do not recognise that their dog's place in the hierarchy is below that of any child.

If anyone thinks calling 'Aw, he's just being friendly!' is okay... no, they have dog that should be on a lead. If not muzzled.

[quote Flamingolingo]@winetime89 I have worked bloody hard to try to ease my child’s fear of dogs (it stems from him being knocked clean over by a GSP at about 15 months - I thought he had forgotten until we encountered a very similar dog a while back). I’ve got him to accept and even be affectionate to certain known-to-us dogs (he even has a doggy friend that he plays with). I organised for the dogs trust to visit and run a session at his nursery. I talk to him about every dog encounter afterwards and explain to him. I instruct him to stand still, and to keep calm and quiet, often very loudly so that the dog owner can hear me trying. But he’s just terrified and people need to understand that not everyone loves dogs.[/quote]
That's great. Your doing everything you can to encourage him not to be scared. he doesn't have to like dogs but it will be so much easier for him if he's not scared of them as he's going to come across them so much (especially If he's like mine and love the outdoors) unfortunately there's always going to be giddy dogs or dogs that run past him but near him or barking dogs or as you've experienced dogs that bound over , but I can't ever see this changing unfortunately so all you can do is encourage and talk to him.
I do walk in a country park twice a day though and there is definitely parents who pander to their kids fear and make it worse.

@hibbledobble

A lot of misinformation here: Dogs don't need to be on leads in parks, unless there is a byelaw that requires this. Dogs also do need off lead exercise, this is nothing to do with owners being lazy, but allowing dogs to run mainly, but also allowing some freedom. My dog can run faster than me, and a lot longer, and needs to do so to remain fit.

Aye fine, but only if you've put in the effort to ensure your dog has good recall. If not, it shouldn't be off lead unless in a deserted area whilst you are training it to have good recall.

It is a massive amount of work to train some breeds to cone away when called, hence all the lazy/shit owners who trot out the "only playing" line. The truth is they either can't be arsed to train their dog, or (if the dog is untrainable) they think the dog's rights trump other people's. [Angry]

"Where are all these marauding dogs?!"
I often wonder that myself on these threads. I live in a fairly rural area where dogs are a common sight but never seem to encounter these out of control, slobbery, incontinent feral beasts I read about on MN on a weekly basis.

Honestly I think a breed that needs SO much fast running isnt really suited to being a domestic pet but more so a working dog eg on a farm etc where there aren't going to be lots of young children etc.
Why should they have to be working dogs when it's perfectly possible to exercise them appropriately?

The world doesn't have to revolve around the fact that some people have young children (and that some of those parents think their child comes first in every situation).

I'd argue if people choose to bring their young children to a large open space where it's know people walk dogs off lead then they've got no grounds to be complaining that there's off lead dogs having appropriate exercise. They'd have grounds to complain if a dog ran up and approached them, but not the existence of off lead exercise.

@DeeTractor

"Where are all these marauding dogs?!" I often wonder that myself on these threads. I live in a fairly rural area where dogs are a common sight but never seem to encounter these out of control, slobbery, incontinent feral beasts I read about on MN on a weekly basis.

Maybe you living in a more rural area is your answer.

People on here are talking about local, urban parks. With dog-owners who either can't be bothered, or do not know how to manage their 'fur-baby'....

Poor bloody animal. What a miserable life.
Mine is on lead a great deal as the area I live in and walk through is very livestock heavy. Stops him getting shot for being loose around livestock. We run 6 - 10 miles per day 5 days per week, longer for one day per week and a long slow walk for the remaining day. We have a large garden that he gets to run full pelt in and potter in. He certainly doesn't have a miserable life and I put in a lot of effort to ensure that it isn't!! I don't think you can just make blanket judgements that dogs that are on lead a fair bit are miserable.

@LolaSmiles

Honestly I think a breed that needs SO much fast running isnt really suited to being a domestic pet but more so a working dog eg on a farm etc where there aren't going to be lots of young children etc. Why should they have to be working dogs when it's perfectly possible to exercise them appropriately?

The world doesn't have to revolve around the fact that some people have young children (and that some of those parents think their child comes first in every situation).

I'd argue if people choose to bring their young children to a large open space where it's know people walk dogs off lead then they've got no grounds to be complaining that there's off lead dogs having appropriate exercise. They'd have grounds to complain if a dog ran up and approached them, but not the existence of off lead exercise.

Lola- 'the child' does come first every time.

Sorry.

YANBU. I love dogs, we had german shepherds when I was growing up and I'm not in the least bit frightened of them.

I had an unnerving experience this morning though! Went running down the lane I live on (we are rural, there's a few houses dotted along the lane and lots of fields). Passed a house further down where they have a german shepherd. Unfortunately, they allow it to roam on their land but where it can get through the hedges.

So, I go walking past (I don't run past in case I startle the dog). Hear it barking and suddenly the bloody thing jumps out of the hedge at me, barking and showing its bloody enormous teeth

Now, as mentioned, I am not frightened of dogs and happen to be used to this breed so I was able to stand calmly until the owner appeared. It was the families son, a boy of only about 15 who, to his credit was very apologetic and I think more shocked than I was!

I didn't say much to the boy as he's only a kid, just reassured him I was fine and went on my way, however, I do worry what would have happened if it had been someone who is frightened of dogs who may not have been able to stay calm. Worse still of they tried to run away as german shepherds tend to chase and then bite.

People who own dogs need to keep them under control and appreciate that not everyone likes dogs.

A dog is a pack animal which can be a huge risk to a young child. Their fear of a dog is an entirely natural thing which ensures a young child exercises caution to protect themselves. That good natural caution is overridden by over friendly domesticated dogs.

It doesnt change that that natural fear is a protective attribute in a child and I am no way going to train my child out of it. There are over 200,000 cases of dogs biting humans every year in England. I teach my child how to behave sensibly around animals but I'm perfectly happy he is cautious, even fearful of dogs.

I don’t mind dogs or get too concerned about this, but I know what you are talking about. Today in the park a dog came and managed to nick several sandwiches from our picnic (owner v apologetic but still) and another one knocked over my toddler. She was fine but the owner of that one said ‘she’s fine isn’t she’ and that was that. There does seem to be some owners who feel its fine for their dogs to behave like this and other people will just accommodate.

Honestly I think a breed that needs SO much fast running isnt really suited to being a domestic pet but more so a working dog eg on a farm etc where there aren't going to be lots of young children etc

Mine’s a Jack Russell, she weighs 5kg. She’s a perfect domestic pet. She runs and runs and runs some more. And she’s an absolute joy to watch. She does all her running in deserted fields or woodland.

Some of those parents think their child comes first in every situation

That's because the child does come first. From a legal perspective, from a moral perspective, in every single fucking way the child always comes ahead of the dog. Always.

My dogs aren’t interested in other people or other dogs- they are kept on lead- and I make sure we don’t get too close to anyone when out walking.My dogs are very docile and luckily I have always had people ask to pet them first.I am acutely aware of people with dog phobia as previously that was me.I literally couldn’t walk anywhere on my own as I was petrified of seeing a dog.I exercise them off lead where appropriate and they have very good recall-The etiquette I thought- as a dog owner- is you put your dog on a lead If you see another dog on the lead-
I have had a couple of times where big bouncy dogs kept pestering me and my dogs- and one which jumped up at me- hitting both my kneecaps- I have severe osteoarthritis in both- I wanted to cry.

Just by keeping your dog on a lead is so simple and makes life so much more pleasant for everyone.I realise that I’m lucky because we have countryside and the option of a dog park.Its a shame there can’t be a dog only park where owners could go -leaving other parks only for human beings- in every residential area

Youstupidboy

You sound like a responsible dog owner, for that I thank you & I'm sure your local farmers appreciate your consideration of livestock too.

My sole aim when walking the dog is to stay a mile away from anyone else. I try very hard to achieve that aim.

So...

• runners/cyclist who rush up from behind without warning

• people that try to say hello to the dog without checking first (inc children)

-people with out of control dogs

...Don't get much of a welcome here, though an apology smooths the way somewhat.

This was especially true for the arsehole in the local woods whose Labrador (George) was allowed off lead to approach me and my on lead dog at the very edge of a wide path, snarling, until he was close enough to strike. This was the second time he had done so, hence my rather sweary explosion.

Agree that few owners seem to have proper knowledge of their dog and couldn't recognise their own dog being unfriendly if he bit them on the arse.

@LolaSmiles

Honestly I think a breed that needs SO much fast running isnt really suited to being a domestic pet but more so a working dog eg on a farm etc where there aren't going to be lots of young children etc. Why should they have to be working dogs when it's perfectly possible to exercise them appropriately?

The world doesn't have to revolve around the fact that some people have young children (and that some of those parents think their child comes first in every situation).

I'd argue if people choose to bring their young children to a large open space where it's know people walk dogs off lead then they've got no grounds to be complaining that there's off lead dogs having appropriate exercise. They'd have grounds to complain if a dog ran up and approached them, but not the existence of off lead exercise.

The world doesn't have to revolve around the fact that some people choose to have dogs (and that some owners think their dogs need for exercise comes before a child safety)

I'd argue that if people choose to bring their dog to a wide open space where it's known that there are people then they should accept that they should have good recall of their dog, and if not then they should be on a lead for people's safety.

@NoIDon'tWatchLoveIsland - lots of my family farm and I grew up rurally, so am well aware of the impact that dogs can have on peoples' livelihoods. It's a shame when people see the countryside as purely a playground!! I am on good terms with the farmers in our area.

Mine’s a Jack Russell, she weighs 5kg. She’s a perfect domestic pet. She runs and runs and runs some more.

Yes, because she was bred to be a working dog, for fox hunting. Not as a domestic pet.

Haven't read full thread but from OP no YANBU. I was walking down the main road a few weeks ago with my 6yo when a dog came from nowhere and started barking at him. No owner to be seen. Of course DS panicked and ran away. I wasn't sure what to do to be honest - drop my shopping bags and try to get the dog? What if it had bitten DS leg? Time felt like it had frozen around me, though it was probably only around 2 mins, the owner finally came out from the flats behind the arcade of shops we were passing and said 'she won't do anything, she's a softie who loves kids, don't worry' - well that's great but how did I know?! What if DS had touched it the wrong way or in the wrong place or made the wrong noise and it had snapped. Still scares me now to be honest I genuinely don't know what I should have done. I'm sure if I had kicked the dog away or anything the owner would have been furious. Either keep your dog on a lead/take steps to prevent them from escaping - if a genuine accident happens you should be hot on its heels.