To be utterly exasperated with the ‘but she’s really friendly’ dog owners out there

[Flamingolingo]

You know the kind - the ones who holler after their bounding dog who barks and bows and jumps at you about how friendly they are.

I feel like since lockdown I’ve had multiple altercations with people and their marauding dogs. Especially either while out running or out with my small children who are terrified.

That’s not to say there aren’t loads of really responsible dog owners out there who do try and call their dog back/put it on the lead, but the few who make no attempt other than shout about their friendliness really get my goat. For clarity: we are mostly using city centre green space, that is quite busy, I think in a rural location it’s a little different.

So I guess my Aibu is about my being annoyed at people who assume everyone wants their ‘friendly’ dog to bound into their social space, and who make no attempt to call their dog back unless specifically asked to.

@OchonAgusOchonO to answer your questions: yes I have encountered children in public. None of your examples compare to a possibly dangerous, messy dog jumping up at you at best or mauling you at worst. All your questions demonstrate is your deep dislike for children. Don't want to fawn over someone else's child? Then don't. Don't want to be disturbed by a kid on a bike? Then pay attention to your surroundings.

I don't know I find it more irritating having random children try to smother my two dogs (pugs)

A child tried to grab one with open arms on the beach over the weekend

My SIL got a dog about three years ago, a cute little cloud of a thing which helped hugely with my children's fear of dogs - fear ignited by the countless times we were expected to put up with people's 'friendly' dogs accosting us in public spaces. In saying this, SIL has made one half hearted attempt to train her dog, which was largely ineffectual. As a result, I find the dog irritating - jumping up on me, scrabbling at my clothes, jumping onto me when I'm eating, barking long and loud at every sodding animal, mineral or vegetable that crosses its line of sight.

So, I don't know why she thought the best solution might be .... oh, to get another dog. This one is bigger and very, very energetic. She was taken to the same training course as the other dog. Zero effect. I don't know whether the training course is not very good, or whether SIL just can't be arsed applying the rules. I suspect the latter.

Anyway, she asked us to meet her in a park a while back where she was taking the dogs for a walk. The kids were very excited at seeing the dogs. It was a blinking nightmare. There is a sign up saying that dogs must be kept on a lead. She ignored it. Other dog owners, indeed most dog owners, ignored it. Her dogs went completely mad, charging about like headless chickens, accosting people left, right and centre. I was red faced at her constant smiling apologies to innocent bystanders, many of whom were more gracious than they should have been. These are not large dogs, but to a toddler it might as well be the hound of the Baskervilles hurtling towards them. I won't be going on any more walks with them. DP can take the kids to meet her if he wants, but I'm staying well out of it!

I think you’ll find you don’t if your dog is out of control. It’s an offence

Off lead doesn’t equal out of control.

Dogs should be under control and their owners should clear up after them. We’re all on the same page here. There’s absolutely no need for all the hyperbole and hysteria.

Oh please don’t! My dog is obedient and comes when called so is perfectly fine off the lead-however only the other day something went wrong! A girl child was on the floor on her hands and knees playing and my dog run full pelt towards her!! I was shouting but she just ignored me!! She has never done that before- the child wasn’t scared of dogs and my dog didint jump up at her, she wanted to play, my kids get in that position and the dog thinks that’s play time. The kids parents weren’t there thank god, and she wasn’t scared- also thank god! But I could have died!! Don’t know what came over her and I was so shocked.

I can only assume the dog got confused and thought it was one of my kids as when she put her head up and stroked her I was still calling her and she came right back to me then- not an excuse for the dog-but was so out of character and I was really sorry about it- were not all bad dog owners, sometimes things just happen, although it shouldn’t obviously.

Agree with the OP, but like kids, dogs sometimes do things out of character and embarrass their owners/parents. And people who are really scared of dogs shouldn't go to places where dogs are allowed off leads. I'm always prepared to put my dog back on a lead but also I'm not psychic.

@Notredamn - to answer your questions: yes I have encountered children in public. None of your examples compare to a possibly dangerous, messy dog jumping up at you at best or mauling you at worst.

A poster up thread ended up with a broken ankle from a child jumping out in front of them.

All your questions demonstrate is your deep dislike for children. Don't want to fawn over someone else's child? Then don't.

I don't dislike children. I dislike poor behaviour by children and adults.

Don't want to be disturbed by a kid on a bike? Then pay attention to your surroundings.

Out of control child coming up behind you on a bike can be difficult to avoid. I could also suggest you pay attention to your surroundings and move if you see a dog. However, I wouldn't, as it is the responsibility of the dog owner to ensure the dog doesn't bother you. It is also the responsibility of the parents to ensure their child doesn't bother me.

Crikey! I’ve met some batshit people when out walking my dogs - who do may be off lead but never out of control. People who scream, “children, children come here. There’s a dog. Quick! It’s going to bite you!! 😱” Cue children running and screaming, hysterical parents, dogs who become “interested” in all the palaver but still walk to heel straight past them..... but I have yet to meet anyone quite as batshit as Mrs Goggins 🙄

As I’ve said all through this thread nobody wants strange dogs jumping all over them and nobody likes to see dog shit all over the place - especially dog owners. People who don’t pick up after their dogs give all dog owners a bad name.

Stating that dogs are wild animals is totally off the wall! 😂

Off lead doesn’t equal out of control.
Dogs should be under control and their owners should clear up after them.
This sums it up.

If a dog is out of control and the owner is doing nothing about the behaviour then that's wrong.
It doesn't mean everyone who is a responsible dog owner should be told they have dangerous vicious pets and should keep them on lead because some people don't like seeing off lead dogs.

Yanbu this has happened to us a lot this year. It’s ridiculous every time we go to our local park it happens our two year old is now scared of dogs. We will deliberately keep well away From dogs if playing on our local playing field Yet the dog owners let them come running up to us and don’t give a shit. My Husband is not one for confrontation at all but he has had words with a fair few now normally it’s has happened multiple times first aswell. I honestly think dogs should be on leads in public it ruins it for others and even the most friendly dog has the potential to cause a lot of damage

I'd like to see more dog free zones or perhaps offlead dogs confined only to dog-friendly zones, have any other countries had success with this type of approach, does anyone know?

I do think that there is a rise in anti dog sentiment

@SayNotoArtificialLipids, Why should I? My puppy has very good recall now. She will go to people and dogs freely because she's a sociable dog but will gage when people don't respond to her and move on. The only time she still jump to people us when people give her a lot of fuss and I'm teaching her not to even though everyone says it's absolutely fine (she's small).

As said, I haven't encountered any issues and actually have got many comments at how well behaved she is for her age.

I trust comments and advice from real life much ahead of that of MNers!

I can't help wonder if there is a regional issue here because as far as I can recall, I only 3ver had one dog jumping up to me and the owners couldn't stop apologising. I walk 15k steps aversge a day. Never ever seen a dog jump on a stranger in my local dog friendly park.

". I don't! I am Ok with ours"

Wait, what? You don't like dogs but you have a German Shepherd???

Everyone who is scared of dogs has a damned good reason in their history. My eldest - now an adult - is still petrified of them as a result of many times being knocked flat as a toddler by a large off-lead dog. The more scared he got, the more he screamed, the more over-excited the dogs got. We'd be playing football on the council fields and there would frequently be some butthead letting their dog off lead without being able to recall it. Happened at least 6 times in 4 years and he was pinned down and hysterical.
"Just being friendly" doesn't feel like it when the animal is bigger than you and you can't get away.

If a dog can't respond promptly to recall it should be illegal for it to be off lead in public. Any dog owner who objects is admitting they can't control their pet.

Everyone who is scared of dogs has a damned good reason in their history.
Yes, but not all of those reasons stem from a dog being aggressive.

The reason I spent years terrified of dogs was because I had a relative of the hysterical persuasion that some have shown on here. As a child every dog was branded as a scary dog or out of control if they were running around. I remember being yanked by the arm out the way of dogs who were showing no interest in us at all, or pulled into doorways if a dog passed on lead. Nobody taught me how to read dogs or establish the difference between friendly and wary behaviour. Nobody taught me how to approach dogs or behave around them. There was no reasonable assessment of a situation or appraisal of the risk, just a blanket 'ooh scary dog'.

The result was a fear that left me frozen to the spot if I saw a dog that was 'too close', but too close was actually nowhere near me. Those relatives passed their hangups onto me and my siblings and it's only in adulthood we've got over it because we've had friends and partners who have had dogs.
As a dog owner now I have real issues with people who pass their hangups onto their children and want to police the perfectly legal actions of others based on their hangups. There's space in society for everyone to do their thing.

LolaSmiles for sure this is a problem. I see it all the time when I'm out with my 2 dogs. When we are near people I have them on the lead, we stay minding our business and give as much space as we can. My dogs don't care about other people, one of them actively avoids going anywhere near people, they just trot along looking for their next lamppost to sniff and people still pull their kids away, tell them to watch out, be careful, holding them close. It's 2 pugs lumbering along, not big scary looking dogs. These parents are doing their kids no favours teaching them to be afraid of every dog that goes within 10 metres of them. Just ignore us and we will ignore you.

I saw this on a dog trainer's FB page.

I'm not especially scared of dogs I just dont want to be inconvenienced by them, to me they are just pests, like rats or seagulls.

@FinnegansWhiskers - but I have yet to meet anyone quite as batshit as Mrs Goggins 🙄

I don't know. There are a few other candidates here. There are some who are incensed at my suggestion that all users of public areas should treat one another with respect and consideration. Apparently, the onus, out of all users of these areas, is only on dog owners. For all other inconsiderate behaviour, it's up to the irritated to avoid the irritating.

And those mortally offended at the suggestion that parents should control their children's behaviour because it's comparing children to dogs.

Then there was the really bizarre post suggesting dog owners get some sort of weird kick out of dog poo.

Then there was the really bizarre post suggesting dog owners get some sort of weird kick out of dog poo.

That really is batshit. It's like suggesting that parents want to have DC because they get a kick about changing nappies when they're babies and toddlers.

The reality is that people put up with the less pleasant part of having dogs/DC, because they think the good parts outweigh the less pleasant aspects like dealing with poo.

This thread is about dogs and their inconsiderate owners. It's not about inconsiderate people in general. If you want to moan about hating children and joking (?) about rather shooting a child rather than a dog then start another thread instead of derailing this one. Control your dogs people. We don't care if it's being 'friendly'. I don't want to play.

The OP is not being unreasonable. Some people should not have dogs in my opinion.