To be utterly exasperated with the ‘but she’s really friendly’ dog owners out there

[Flamingolingo]

You know the kind - the ones who holler after their bounding dog who barks and bows and jumps at you about how friendly they are.

I feel like since lockdown I’ve had multiple altercations with people and their marauding dogs. Especially either while out running or out with my small children who are terrified.

That’s not to say there aren’t loads of really responsible dog owners out there who do try and call their dog back/put it on the lead, but the few who make no attempt other than shout about their friendliness really get my goat. For clarity: we are mostly using city centre green space, that is quite busy, I think in a rural location it’s a little different.

So I guess my Aibu is about my being annoyed at people who assume everyone wants their ‘friendly’ dog to bound into their social space, and who make no attempt to call their dog back unless specifically asked to.

No YANBU. I honestly think that if dogs weren't already an established pet and someone came up with the idea there would be a fuss.
Imagine the pitch "I have an idea for a household pet. There's this animal that craps everywhere and owners might or might not pick it up, and even if they bag it they may just leave bags of crap lying around, it jumps on and slobers on people, has to be trained to behave and not everyone will be arsed to train it, it barks, sometimes until neighbours are tearing their hair out... oh, and a lot of people are scared of it because it might bite or kill them, in fact some have killed children, but it needs a lot of exercise so it has to run about in public spaces.... how does that sound?"
Imaginary response "No, that sounds like a crazy idea."

Obviously I know this doesn't apply to all dogs. Some are lovely and well trained and so are the owners. But I also know 2 people who were badly bitten in completely separate dog attacks so I probably am prejudiced.

My children are scared of dogs having been bowled over like skittles by digs bounding up to them when they were toddlers, having had a cake snatched from their hands when they were sitting on a rug having a picnic in a park and by digs running up and barking at them.
I am frightened of dogs after one but my sister and I am put off them further by a friends dog sticking its face in my groin and by others running up, barking at me and getting dog slobber on my clothes when I was out in a park
I have also had to clean dog poo off my kids shoes and pushchair wheels more tubes than I care to think and dog poo is absolutely disgusting. I live in the country and it's a real issue with people leaving it as they think it's rural so it will rot away - it isn't ok, people still tread on it.

Haven’t RTFT but I hate the “he’s just being friendly / wants to play” brigade. My dog doesn’t and will get snarky if yours does. So if you can’t control your dog (ie stop it approaching other dogs) keep it on the lead.

When my son was a toddler he was running in the park and a dog off a lead got excited and started bouncing around and the dog owner told me to tell my son to stop running!

I'm allergic to dogs and with the amount of incidents I've had I've had to stop going to parks.

I've been laying resting on my back with my eyes shut and had a dog jump on my face. I jumped up and hurt my neck.

I've had dogs run all over my clothes and bag. I have to go home and wash these items on their own wash. Sometimes there isn't the opportunity to do that, if I'm on my way somewhere.

I've had dogs snarl at me, had a dog bite me, walked in dog shit. Had a dog chase me with the owner wailing in the background as I ran away towards a road. Quite frankly I just wanted to get out of the park, the dog is secondary to that and it's her problem, should I just let it attack/bite me?

Had dogs jump on my stuff, explained to them I'm allergic and it affects me breathing, told it won't happen again. 15 minutes later on the way back from their walk, the dog runs up to me and jumps/runs all over my stuff. They don't keep their word.

It just isn't worth it. I can't sit down on the grass and relax as it happens so frequently. So my love of parks has been ruined. I don't go any more. If I go for a walk I go on a pavement by a road.

I have a phobia of dogs, and freeze in terror if one approaches me off lead or of I spot one on its own and I can't see the owner. I hate owners who say they're only being friendly I don't want them anywhere near me.

I was bitten twice as a child once by a Jack Russel the other by a German Shepherd, both where freely roaming the estate with out their owners.

I went for a walk a few evenings ago and I freaked as a German Shepherd came hurtling towards us barking, the owner came round the corner tutting saying he's only having a bit of fun. I'm pregnant at the minute and am really worried I'm going to pass the fear onto my child.

Mamamia--seriously? That is so disgusting!!

Its really not that difficult. If you have a dog that doesn't like other dogs, keep them on the lead. If another dog comes to it and it growls or get snarky, then that's fine it's telling the other dog to back off and eventually, the dog will. No harm caused. If you dog is likely to bite another dog then they need to have a muzzle on.

I sympathise with people who are scared of dogs, but do you really expect all dogs who might pass by you to be on the lead, restricting their pleasure time so you can walk freely anywhere?

My dog is friendly. She does run up to people and dogs but she does recall well Although it takes a couple of goes if she’s really excited. I’m not going to keep her on a lead in case she runs up to someone for 10 seconds. I do try to walk away from others but she needs a proper run that she can’t get on a lead.

@OchonAgusOchonO typical response I’d expect from a dog owner. Rude and uncalled for. Sexist, too.

*fascinated
And what is it with dogs that come up and stick their faces in your groin? It’s just so disgusting...*

They like strong smells......

OchonAgusOchonO typical response I’d expect from a dog owner. Rude and uncalled for. Sexist, too.

Actually, with big dogs, I think it's mostly because of their height. Their nose is at the level of our groins. It's not meant to be disgusting.

Dogs like to sniff my thighs, especially my friend's Lab Retriever. I think it's because they're attracted to the cat smell.

When my son was a toddler he was running in the park and a dog off a lead got excited and started bouncing around and the dog owner told me to tell my son to stop running

When my son was 12 (relevant) we were out running together in a park and someone's dogs chased us. When I told them to keep their dogs under control they told me to keep my son under control!

I reported them to the dog warden and didn't see them again. Entitled twits.

[quote fascinated]@OchonAgusOchonO typical response I’d expect from a dog owner. Rude and uncalled for. Sexist, too.[/quote]
@fascinated - Slight over reaction on your part!

You asked what is it with dogs that do this. Pretty logical to assume you actually wanted an answer.

I responded with a jokey response that explained why (although I would have thought it was pretty obvious). Dogs' have an excellent sense of smell and spend a lot of time when out an about sniffing at things. It doesn't mean the individual is unhygienic. In fact, dogs can be trained to detect hormones and other smells undetectable to humans to aid in medical diagnoses www.theguardian.com/technology/2018/nov/04/five-diseases-that-dogs-can-detect.

Also, how, exactly, was the response sexist? I've never known dogs to discriminate in their sniffing?

And for the record, I do not allow my dogs to do this. They are not allowed approach people without permission. If only people would do the same, rather than assuming they can approach my dogs without permission.

I’m not going to keep her on a lead in case she runs up to someone for 10 seconds. I do try to walk away from others but she needs a proper run that she can’t get on a lead

So go somewhere where there aren't people (not so easy in the last few months I know, but normally not too difficult).

Life was easier when dog owners took their dogs out for walks early mornings and late evenings. Now they're "part of the family" and taken everywhere at all times of day, it's difficult to avoid some level of conflict.

I sympathise with people who are scared of dogs, but do you really expect all dogs who might pass by you to be on the lead, restricting their pleasure time so you can walk freely anywhere

Well yes I do, because I think humans are more important than a dog's "right" to run all over the place, trip people up, push kids over and potentially bite them. If you can keep up with your off-lead dog, it's fine, but so many are completely out of control. That said, where I live, the majority of dog owners are very considerate, it's rare that a dog runs up to you and really causes hassle.

I have said this before, but I think there needs to be a network of "dog fields" that people can rent by the hour for their dogs to run freely. I know someone who has one in Berkshire - it's a fantastic idea.

There is a network of dog fields. We use them all year round. The difference is that in the winter, when it’s cold, wet and muddy, the only people who use them are dogs and the people walking them. Come summer - particularly this summer - they’re colonised with people who decide their rights trump those of all year round users.

There is a network of dog fields. We use them all year round. The difference is that in the winter, when it’s cold, wet and muddy, the only people who use them are dogs and the people walking them. Come summer - particularly this summer - they’re colonised with people who decide their rights trump those of all year round users

This ^^

And the same with beaches. Dog walkers are out in all winds and weathers. How dare they walk a beach, woods, park, track, field when the sun is shining and the dog haters are out in force 🙄

YANBU.

I could have written this post - I am also sick of dogs coming up to me and my children in small city centre parks. On Saturday, a dog bounded onto our picnic blanket (we were just sitting on it, didn't actually have any food) and snatched a toy away from 11 month old DD and then ran off with it. When I went to retrieve it I told the dog owner that the dog should be on a lead - because there are signs up in the park saying that all dogs should be on leads. The dog's owner's response was: "Why should I?". Why should you? Why should you?? Because you can't control your fucking dog and it just stole my baby's toy, that's why!! And because there are notices up in this park saying that all dogs should be on leads!!

Then this morning a dog bounded onto our picnic blanket (again, no food on it) and absolutely terrified DD. The owner came to retrieve it but didn't put it on a lead, and it bounded up to us again just five minutes later. Keep your animal away from me!

And I have no sympathy for the "but dogs should be free to run about" and "but you can't expect dogs to behave if children are running and screaming" arguments. Nope, sorry, people are more important than dogs.

@MrsD28 - And I have no sympathy for the "but dogs should be free to run about" and "but you can't expect dogs to behave if children are running and screaming" arguments. Nope, sorry, people are more important than dogs.

I don't think anyone has suggested that here. Off lead exercise is important for dogs. However, I, and pretty much all other dog owners on this thread, have agreed that they should be under control at all times and that if the owner can't control them, they should be on a lead.

It's not a question of whether dogs or people are more important. It's about people having consideration for other people with whom they are sharing a space. That includes dog owners having control of their dogs, parents having control of their children, cyclists and joggers being considerate in where and how they cycle and run, smokers being considerate of others etc etc.

It's not a question of whether dogs or people are more important. It's about people having consideration for other people with whom they are sharing a space. That includes dog owners having control of their dogs, parents having control of their children, cyclists and joggers being considerate in where and how they cycle and run, smokers being considerate of others etc etc.

^This with bells on. Finally some common sense!

It's not a question of whether dogs or people are more important. It's about people having consideration for other people with whom they are sharing a space. That includes dog owners having control of their dogs, parents having control of their children, cyclists and joggers being considerate in where and how they cycle and run, smokers being considerate of others etc etc.

Yup. But bearing in mind that dogs are no way anywhere near as important as children.

Thought experiment:
I am going to shoot this dog in the head or I'm going to shoot this child in the head. You choose...

@TheSandman

It's not a question of whether dogs or people are more important. It's about people having consideration for other people with whom they are sharing a space. That includes dog owners having control of their dogs, parents having control of their children, cyclists and joggers being considerate in where and how they cycle and run, smokers being considerate of others etc etc.

Yup. But bearing in mind that dogs are no way anywhere near as important as children.

Thought experiment:
I am going to shoot this dog in the head or I'm going to shoot this child in the head. You choose...

What? That has to be one of the more ridiculous arguments I've seen on here. And to be honest, I much prefer my dogs to lots of other people's children.

Relative importance of children vs dogs is completely irrelevant to this discussion. If you go down that road, are children more important than older adults or vice versa? Who should I shoot if given a choice between an elderly person and a child?

All the bad behaviour posters are mentioning is as a result of people's lack of consideration for others.

People who consider their children to be the centre of the universe and who expect everyone else to be utterly enchanted with their little darlings poor behaviour are every bit as badly behaved and inconsiderate as dog owners who expect everyone to tolerate their dogs' poor behaviour.

Oh goodness, this thread has taken a serious turn!

But yes, humans are above animals in the pecking order, although neither should be shot in the head, ever.

But free will and the fact my child will be paying taxes to fund your retirement, whilst your dog will remain a freeloader forever, means humans trump dogs imo.

my child will be paying taxes to fund your retirement

No they won’t, I’ll be dead by the time your child starts paying taxes.

The answer is very simple. My dog will be on her lead anywhere designated for children to play and in the park. She will be off lead in the places she’s walked 365 days a year, she’ll ignore your children unless they approach her, in which case she may well jump up and lick their faces. If you’re not cool with that, keep them away from her.

But free will and the fact my child will be paying taxes to fund your retirement, whilst your dog will remain a freeloader forever, means humans trump dogs imo.

Pretty appalling argument too. Does that mean people who are dependent on social welfare and are net beneficiaries are lower down the pecking order than high earners who are net contributors? I don't think a society that only values monetary contribution as a measure of worth is one I want to live in.