Hoop has closed, soft play isn't opening for the foreseeable... AIBU to wonder what I am actually going to do this winter with two kids?

[AuntVictoria]

Having a bit of a pity party this evening. I have a DS2 and DD is due any day now. DS and I went out loads over mat leave, to baby groups, soft play, stay and play etc. I don't know how I'm going to survive a year of entertaining two small children with nowhere to when it's cold and raining :( I know I'll manage and they didn't have all of these things in years gone past and were fine, but I'm feeling pretty downcast and worried about mat leave this evening.

I ended up making a make shift softplay set-up at home. Ball pit, those gym mats from IKEA and a couple of soft play items (you can buy online from companies like Imspex or Softplay Solutions). Not perfect, but my toddler loves the set-up.

It's not fun but you will survive it, our daughter has an immune condition which means we couldn't take her to baby groups, shops, relatives houses etc until she was over one and fully through the first winter and even then we had to limit contact and be so so cautious. So we had practice at covid etiquette long before it was a thing! Buggy walks even in autumn with the raincover on can be a nice way to kill a few hours and to meet up with people, there is talk of children's groups and classes reopening though, so even if it's mini music or yoga babies or whatever there may be things you can do just a little differently to what you expect.

Use your imagination.

As you sat, we didn't have these things when mine were small. I like the idea of buying some kit and creating a play one. Temporary if space is an issue. You could invite carefully selected friends with babies to come and play. Take turns to host.

Get an all in one waterproof for your oldest with a fleece lining - unless its absolutely pouring you can still enjoy walks and playgrounds and it will be healthier than a soft play environment.

What's Hoop?

You will manage, you'll have to, do you have outside space you can use?

Get full waterproofs for your oldest, and warm waterproof clothes for baby and you - and off to the playground and park. Its great fun! (no local softplay here, and the closest is £12 per person - no thanks)

We also just bundle everyone into waterproofs and go out in the rain. PUDDLES!

Although less fun with a small baby I appreciate...

My mum was telling me all about how there weren’t all the soft play things etc when I was small and then finished off by saying “it was totally boring - much better these days!”
There are things though; walk in a park/garden/NT followed by lunch in the cafe and home in the afternoon. Trips to farms? Look for local playgroups, trip to library, music class, swimming, friends with other toddlers, walks wrapped up warm.
If you have a couple of organised things every week to do, then factor in a playgroup day, outdoor walk day and meeting a friend day, that’s your week done.

My daughter was seriously ill last winter so we couldn't take her and DS (3) to any groups or soft play etc. DS went to preschool for a couple of mornings which made a huge difference.

Swimming pools will be opening soon, you could do that on a weekend when partner can help. Definitely invest in wet weather gear and get to the park rain or shine, and organise some playdates

My son is now 16 but we did lots of outdoors stuff in all weathers, but my biggest win was the Pets at Home store on the local retail park. Like a trip to a mini zoo on a rainy day.

How do you organise playdates if you don't have any friends? We moved cities and I don't have any friends with children here.

No playgroups on either and the children's classes that are on again are for private groups of friends only which leads to the same issue of not having friends.

I’m 40 and when I was little my mum took me to a playgroup every day. They have been around a long time.

DreamingofSunshine What I did was join a group called "MyTown* mummy club" on facebook, then joined a whatsapp group for ladies with due around the same time, then after a little while chatting ask if anyone wants to go for a coffee/pushchair walk round the big park etc.

Get them proper winter/wet outfits ready so you can go out regardless of the weather

Yup another one saying invest in decent waterproof, neoprene wellies and warm mittens..

Near us there is a farm, an aquarium, and adventure playground type place and a mini zoo which have all reopened in the last few weeks, swimming is also going to open soon, so will be our indoor option.

As DS is unlikely to be able to have a birthday party this year, I'm putting the money we would have spent towards some annual passes (around £30 each for most places near us) then pick one day a week to go to each place.

Still working on plan but looks like
Monday - swimming
Tuesday - play date with friends kids
Wednesday - attraction 1 (aquarium)
Thursday - park / craft at home
Friday - attraction 2 (probably farm)

Embrace the winter weather. Kids aren’t really bothered about rain as long as they are properly dressed for it. Gets yourselves kitted out with the right gear and start getting used to being outdoors every day.

It's 's quite a performance to get a toddler, a baby and yourself togged up for a boring walk in miserable weather day after day - it used to do my head in tbh. The idea of investing in some sort of indoor soft play yourself sounds a good one. You may need to convert your living room a bit but a ball pool sounds fun and hanging sheets over table and chairs to make a den used to work for mine. Try not to look too far into the future and it won't seem so grim. A library to break up a long day is always a good plan as well.

It's 's quite a performance to get a toddler, a baby and yourself togged up for a boring walk in miserable weather day after day

Well there’s no obligation to do it every day. OP is asking how to keep her kids entertained. Being outside is an option for days when they’re bored of inside.

I sympathise OP. Mine are older now and will occasionally tolerate a wet and cold walk in the right gear but I don't love it tbh.

You can set up little stations in different rooms at home and rotate round. Water play, blowing bubbles, chalk on a blackboard, play dough etc. Read stories on their bed. Slight change of scene. Ask a friend round to join in. Set up a small bubble for yourself with 3-4 friends. Take turns to host. This can be more fun than toddler groups anyway.

It is very hard and I would definitely struggle if my DCs were younger than school age. Luckily I'm a keyworker so they have been in school 2 days a week since June. I do have to home school them, though 🙄

Are you on Instagram. There are some accounts that I swear by.
Play.hooray, dayswithgrey and busytoddler.
All using simple activities. The latter I used for my DS who was only 22 months when DD arrived.
We have zones in our house as well so we rotate play. In the morning we play in the kitchen.
In the afternoon, we go to the upstairs playroom (which is just the baby's room with a £6 Argos parachute hanging on the curtain rail). We do jumping on the bed, and a bit of lazy hide and seek.
I make everthing an activity - even answering the door, watering the plants. Even getting a mug from the cupboard to make a cup of tea.

I promise after a month or so, you will become ace and invent your own games and surprise yourself. I know it's going to be hell for you and I've been there and then lockdown happened at the end of my mat leave.
But you will manage just fine.

Good luck xx

It doesn’t have to be a boring walk!

You can visit friends and family now. By the winter some toddler groups and play groups will be allowed to open. Put waterproofs on and go out for a walk anyway.