Visiting old friend who has dogs and I’m worried

[Beeorwasp]

Going to stay with an old school friend this weekend, camping on their land, not seen one another for over 2 years which during this time they have moved in with a new partner, and got 4 dogs! 2 are very big, bark a lot and jump up as are still quite young, less than 6 months old. They have a very big garden/woodland and the dogs run free. My partner and our DC are pretty scared of dogs especially DS, and are now saying they don’t want to come as they are worried about the dogs. I don’t think it’s fair to lock the dogs up at their own home and know friends partner is not at all happy about that, friend just keeps saying “it’ll be ok, they are friendly and we just need to get used to them”. DH and DC are my number 1 priority but don’t really want to cancel seeing friend and also missing what’s likely to be our only holiday this year because of dogs!
Any tips? WWYD?

@LazyFace

Jumpy, barking dogs would not help your children overcome their fear of dogs.

I agree with this! I was scared of dogs as a child, having had a couple of experiences with jumpy dogs when little.

I am not at all scared of dogs now but I can see how scary that would be for your DS.

Mr Cobain (my dog) is either lovely and cuddly with velvet ears or a total git. Because I know him and he can't talk I totally rely on knowing where he is in his routine and reading body language and responding appropriately. My DS are teens and can also do this because they live with him and know his ways. He's not an archetype of a dog he is himself.

People who don't live with dogs are not used to reading body language in this way and people who do live with dogs need to respect their individuality instead of thinking they are some sort of ambassador for all dogs.

People who don't live with dogs are not used to reading body language in this way and people who do live with dogs need to respect their individuality instead of thinking they are some sort of ambassador for all dogs.

Oh, very well said. Most dog owners I know are like you. The minority of "love me, love my dog", or "my dog is more important to me than you are" dog owners need to know this, and give responsible dog owners like you a bad name.

I think camping is also a poor option as this is the dogs space and you'd also be at their level. Mostly when people want to put dogs out of the way when they have visitors, they go in the garden which is not an option here.

Forget the fear here I wouldn’t camp where dogs are running free regardless. Be oh so lovely when the dog decides to pee up your tent.

If your kids don't like dogs, don't go. Don't make it the host's problem.

Although in a society where dogs are pretty popular, I do think it's easier if people at least try and get used to them.

We've had weekend guests who know full well we have dogs and waited until they arrived to tell us their kids were terrified of them. They can either become less terrified or find a hotel!

If your friend isn't happy with keeping the dogs in the house (which is her prerogative I suppose) then I would be honest and say the kids and partner are uncomfortable around the dogs and leave it at that.

All these posters saying 'you should really get your kids used to dogs' annoy me. Why should she? I don't want my children around dogs because even the trained ones can be volatile. If you don't plan to have dogs in your home why should you frighten your children by forcing them to stroke and control big dogs when it's something they are never likely to do again?!

@cologne4711

Being afraid of dogs isn't irrational. Being scared of heights (which I am) is irrational, the building I am at the top of isn't suddenly going to collapse and I even get jelly legs looking at some heights on TV! Being claustrophobic is irrational, the sides of the lift aren't suddenly going to close in.

However the risk of being jumped on by an out of control dog or being bitten or knocked off your bike or pushed over if a small child isn't at all unlikely. Happens all the time. Anyway I just don't like them. The idea of being licked or "kissed" by a dog - yuck.

You can't lock dogs up all weekend but I would expect them to be locked away if I was only calling in for an hour or so. If an owner wasn't even willing to do that I wouldn't go. Many of you will probably say that's no loss. Fine.

This is rubbish. The chance of falling from a height or being suffocated from any number of scenarios is as likely as being actually attacked by a vicious dog (as opposed to being jumped on by an over enthusiastic friendly dog, which is the reason most people are scared of dogs).

Unless your partner is a child, he is unreasonable for being scared of dogs and he's probably passing it on to your kids. Don't cancel your holiday because of an adult's silly fear. You can use it as a positive experience for your DCs.