AIBU to be incredibly sad...

[Megadesk63]

That my husband will have to miss his third Christmas in a row with our son and I?...
This also being our son's third Christmas in this world as well (he'll only be 2.5yo).
He's trying his absolute hardest to get his shift changed but it seems like it's not going to happen. And then he's down to work boxing day and 27th as well. (Night shifts which wipe the days out).
I know it's not a massive thing to some, but it's a huge deal in both our families, and I just wish there was some way, feel utterly powerless.
There are a number of other people on the team that could do the shift (who haven't done it the last two years as well) so it's not exactly like he's the only one who could.
It's just been crap on top of crap recently, and this was the cherry on top. And I can't moan about it around him because he's already incredibly sad.
Not sure why I'm posting, maybe just for some solidarity if anyone else has been in the same position, maybe just because it would be good to know if I'm going mad expecting some consideration to be given about a third Christmas shift in a row.

He's back in today so will go and talk to his bosses boss to start the process
I think like a PP suggested, ultimately the only way to completely remove himself from the possibility is to go up the ranks! Which he was going to do anyway but this has given him an incentive to push it faster.

Maybe, when he starts to rise up the ranks, it might be something he is able to influence for those following him through. If this 'lack of system' or 'turn taking' has been as it is for a long time, then clearly others haven't held on to the feeling, as they've moved on through the ranks.

Op I agree this system is completely unfair and if he keeps landing Xmas ' randomly' it isn't working and needs to be addressed. If they absolutely can't change it this year I would put it in writing that he's worked the last 3 and will not be working next years.

It doesn't sound fair, but I agree - celebrate Christmas on another day, and hopefully things will change next year (and if they don't your DH should be asking why).

As an emergency services worker my husband and I have missed loads of Christmas days, birthdays, school plays etc etc. It’s tough, but what did you think would happen when you married an emergency service worker. It will naturally fall on shifts that there’ll be other bank holidays that he won’t work. You both must have known what you were signing up for.

@Idontlikewednesdays it is unusual to work 3 in a row though, I don't think people she should resign themselves to the fact that they'll miss out every year when this needn't be the case and doesn't widely happen.

Children are perfectly capable of understanding that mummy has to work Umm I know which is why I said it should be every other year. I think it's unfair to do 3 years in a row whoever you are.

Could he not 'get Norovirus' on 24th December Please don't do this. And to the person who suggested it....what a selfish way to think. And in my workplace it woule be a surefire way of ensuring you got put on New Year shifts this year and Christmas again the following. It should be give and take. Year on year off is the best way imo.

I manage a care home and it's shit enough being on call on a normal night let alone all through the holidays when it's supposed to be your year off and having your plans scrapped every year because some people phone in sick knowing they'll be ruining your Christmas.

[quote Standardy]@Idontlikewednesdays it is unusual to work 3 in a row though, I don't think people she should resign themselves to the fact that they'll miss out every year when this needn't be the case and doesn't widely happen.[/quote]
Unfortunately it’s not unusual to work several in a row. We know when we join the emergency services that these are the sacrifices we have to make. No one is forcing him to do it. He needs to put his big boy pants on and develop some resilience.