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Original poster

I'm a cleaner - please help me with this customer

97 replies

jess3817 · 16/07/2020 09:57

So about 3 weeks I got a call from a lady, asking for a spring clean taking however long it takes then having 3 hours a week after that. I uusually pop round before hand to meet them and see the size of the house etc so I can gauge time etc. She wouldn't let me and just asked me to come on a set date and clean. I had one day clear that week ( 2 regulars hadn't come back to me at that point so used their time slot) I explained this to her.
Well. Basically she hordes - not really bad like on the telly but getting that way. I was shocked but didn't want to say no because she has various health issues including ME and she really wants the place cleaned up so I agreed to help. I was there 7 hours and when I went again 5 days later it was completely decimated, she wanted me to move on to something else etc etc. I keep my work phone off after 630pm and when I switch it on in the morning 3 times I've had a series of texts when am I coming etc- when I've written it down for her and emailed it. Also, last week she text and asked me to call pest control as she heard scratching in the night I did this for her. I've been getting really stressed about it as I'm not train do equipped for this type of job - I know it's my fault for not saying no in the first place but..- I gently suggested she get a deep cleaning company to sort it wich will help me help her, because then I can come over and just keep on top of things. SHe said she needs to sort through her papers/ she's not ready/ it's not rubbish it's stuff she wants to keep. We had a conversation where I explained I don't think I can do this for her until it's deep cleaned professionally, she doesn't thing it's needed and she wants me to 'maintain things for her' I agreed to the bathroom stairs and half the kitchen. Then on Monday she mentioned the pest control - asked me have them invoiced me fore it? I said no when would they invoice me- I presume they will her when the job is complete? She said because I called them?! I said yes, I called them butbut at no point did I say they could invoice me. A friend of mine thinks she's pulling a fast one.
I've only had her 3 weeks and I'm really stressed over this - I'm thinking about working for her til the end of the month and calling it a day or would that be a bit heartless. - she cancelled me last Thursday and when I arrived on Monday she said oh you can't come today I have an appointment - she could have texted and told me.

OP posts:
StrangeAddiction · 16/07/2020 10:15

I would let her go. Some people seem to equate cleaning and tidying as the same thing - it's not! You are a cleaner not a tidier, especially in a hoarders house. It sounds like she wants someone to go through all of her belongings but you'd probably find she won't throw much - if anything- out.
I think she's put the mouse problem on you because in her head she's paying you to sort out her house and that includes pests.

She needs either a friend/family member or professional declutterer then a deep clean and only then can you offer your services to keep on top of cleaning.

I also think she thinks she's employing you so can let you down etc rather than her being your client who's work you can take on or not.

Original poster
jess3817 · 16/07/2020 10:16

I'm just off to work for another customer now, will text her during a break. Thanks for all the advice - will read properly later. :-)

OP posts:
icelollycraving · 16/07/2020 10:17

God what a nightmare. I think you need to say that you are not equipped to deal with her home, she needs a different service. Why couldn’t she call pest control? She didn’t let you attend first because then you wouldn’t take the job.

LemonBreeland · 16/07/2020 10:21

I think you needs to be clear again with her that although she may not believe she needs a deep clean company that you do, and you are unable to work on her house.

I imagine the reason she didn't let you see the house before was because she has done it previously and been turned down by cleaners.

UpToonGirl · 16/07/2020 10:25

Let her go. If you can make a list of possible companies in the area who can help, cleaning/decluttering services, pest control etc and give it to her. Be kind but firm.

merrylittleway · 16/07/2020 10:25

agree with PP, get in and get the cash you are owed, then walk away (or set out your clear terms and no wiggle room)

AntiHop · 16/07/2020 10:32

The fact that she cancelled you on her doorstep is enough reason to stop working for her. Plus you're right, she needs a specialist service.

Viviennemary · 16/07/2020 10:36

I agree she needs a decluttering service. Or cleaners who work in a team so it wouldn't just be one person doing everything. She's cancelled once which was quite cheeky after such a short time. Get paid what you are owed and then don't go again. Contact the pest control people and ask them to book with her direct.

oakleaffy · 16/07/2020 10:38

“Can she invoice you?!”

WHAAAATTTT?

Huge red flag... so they bill YOU and you never get paid from her!

No, no, and thrice NO!

You are a Cleaner.. where I come from cleaners dust and hoover, they don’t do nasty stuff.

As kids we used to have to tidy our rooms before our Cleaner came.

No way should you be doing stuff like this..
get paid and leave!

A friend helped an elderly neighbour who is a hoarder.. piles of books all over the bed.. I said “ how is the bedding changed?” And friend gave me an old fashioned look....
hoarding is a mental condition..

There was a famous case of it in New York where brothers lived in tunnels of hoarded stuff, until one was crushed by it.. and lay there for months.😱.
Collier brothers? Collyer? The images from 1920s were shocking.

Coffeepot72 · 16/07/2020 10:41

It really annoys me when people treat cleaners shoddily. My cleaner is a godsend, if she didn't come in then I'd lose my Saturdays to cleaning, I do my absolute best to be polite, considerate, organised, I always pay promptly and (to my husband's amusement) I always clean up before she arrives!

MarkRuffaloCrumble · 16/07/2020 10:42

Absolutely get her to pay for the work up until this point and then say you can’t work for her anymore. No need for a reason but if she pushes for one, just say it’s too big a job and you don’t have the time to make a real difference.

I’ve been through maybe 8-10 cleaners, they just leave and the agency sends another one. I don’t take personal offence (my house isn’t gross or especially messy, I presume they just found it wasn’t a good fit for whatever reason - could be distance/time/mess/personalities etc - either way, as a self employed person you can pick and choose the jobs you want.

Branleuse · 16/07/2020 10:43

tell her you wont be coming today as she hasnt paid for monday yet. Then when she pays, ghost her

oakleaffy · 16/07/2020 10:43

Collyer Brothers, Manhattan.. pics were from 1947 not 1920s but the stuff was so ancient I remembered it as older than it was.....
Very sad case.

Rumbletumbleinmytummy · 16/07/2020 10:47

She needs an extreme cleaner
Then she needs cleans to maintain twice a week, until the house doesnt go to a hovel between cleans then once a week but that's gonna take time and shes probably always going to be high stress.
I'd drop her personally.

Haretodaygonetomorrow · 16/07/2020 10:47

Don’t ghost her, so unprofessional. Get payment for the work you’ve done for her, and then explain you feel the task is too much for you to take on. It sounds like she does have serious health problems and needs a proper decluttering service, but it isn’t your responsibility to organise this.

bluebell34567 · 16/07/2020 10:47

when she pays what she owes drop her.

Gingercatlover · 16/07/2020 10:48

Don't carry on with her, I had one like this, wouldn't give me a key and kept cancelling every other week.

No concept of anyone's else's time or earnings being lost, just all about them.

Puzzledandpissedoff · 16/07/2020 10:50

She paid me for the first week; she owes me for last Monday and I'm due to go this afternoon

I suppose you could ask for the money on arrival and then tell her you're not doing any more, but otherwise I'd write off last week's pay and get the hell out of there; the mess in the house is nothing to the mess she'll create in your mind if you carry on with this

And no, there's nothing "heartless" about it. You're a professional, it isn't working for you so you leave

Zaphodsotherhead · 16/07/2020 10:51

I wonder if she's been told to get 'someone in' - by family, perhaps? And so she's hired you so that she can keep them off her back..'oh yes, I've got a cleaner, she comes every week', but that she doesn't really want you to do anything?

It's clearly got beyond her if she can't even ring a pest control person and sort that out herself. I think you need to extricate yourself, as nicely and firmly as you can, her MH problems aren't her fault and she probably doesn't want to be like this. Maybe, as you resign, give her the number of a good deep clean service, then the ball is in her court.

Happydinosaur53 · 16/07/2020 10:51

You've already answered your own question. You're not trained to deal with this. She needs a lot more than you can offer. You need to pull back now as she's already trying to blur the boundries. Get what your owed and call it a day. Hoarding is such a complex issue and can be draining on those who try to help.

MagnoliaJustice · 16/07/2020 10:59

I would do as pp have said - give her a list of companies/people that are able to help her - pest control/decluttering service/deep cleaners etc

Then tell her kindly that you can't help her, it's too much, you are a domestic cleaner, not a specialist able to deal with her requirements. Make sure she pays you for your last shift, then thank her and say goodbye.

Unless she's a vulnerable adult, lacking capacity, then she has to take responsibility for her home life and adjust accordingly, employing the relevant people, and stop taking advantage of your good nature.

Bluntness100 · 16/07/2020 11:02

Ask for your money op then end this arrangement, it will only get worse.

My cleaner had similar issues. One lady kept asking her to pay for things, pleading she didn’t have the money and would pay her back, culminating in a leak which bizarrely she did pay for, because there were kids in the house and water coming through the ceiling and the woman never paid her back.

She also had a client who lived filthy. She had to end the arrangement, she was really distressed about it and showed me a photo, it was awful, gorgeous house but you couldn’t see any surface, dirty nappies on the floor, but not even rolled up, scattered about shit side up, she spent longer trying to clear surfaces to get at them to clean than actually clean.

She kept saying no more and the woman would cry and beg, so she’d go back. Until one day it was so bad and the woman seemed to think it looked lovely and told her to just clean the windows. Even though there was shit smeared everywhere, so she did her shift and simply refused to go back.

Both situations deteriorated and the same will happen here. You think it’s bad now, it will get worse, so just walk away.

RHRA · 16/07/2020 11:04

I'd either write off last Monday's money or go today for the last time and insist on payment for the 2 sessions, so you're not out of pocket.
I couldn't cope with any of that, but the worst thing would be potential rats or mice in her house 🤮🙀

theemmadilemma · 16/07/2020 11:05

No. I would maybe notify adult services to ensure she can get some appropriate help, but you're only going to get dragged deeper into a situation you will have no control over, or ability to improve.

It was nice of you to try though, and not just walk away.

OohThatCat · 16/07/2020 11:06

She wants you to do her life admin, like some sort of PA, on top of cleaning. This is not your job and she needs professional help. You can suggest this to her, but it is not down to you to fix her.

I would get payment for work completed so far, explain you don't offer what she needs, give her the name of a professional company and cut all ties.