It’s frigging BREAD!!!

[MrsA2015]

I have a friend that refers to sliced bread as “toast” it’s starting to REALLY get on my nerves. Born and bred in England with absolutely no issues with the English language but can not distinguish between sliced bread and the end result of it being toasted being TWO DIFFERENT BLOODY THINGS.

“I had two toasts for breakfast”
“I have cheese toasts” (instead of cheese sandwiches).

Aaaaaaaaaarghhhh ffs , no amount of addressing it has made a difference in 15 poxy years.

also says “borrowed” in place of “lend” but I’ve let that one slide.

I can't decide whether that indicates that you are a true friend, or whether a real friend would be compelled to correct them on each occasion to save them the ongoing embarrassment. -Adds raw toast to my vocab--

We’ve been good friends for decades, I’ve corrected as much as I can without seeming patronising! At the end of the day she’s now a grown adult with children!

Why do these sort of things bother people such?
Cripes, hope you never have a real problem!

Someone at my old workplace used to call the toilet the bathroom. "Just going to the bathroom, be right back." There were no baths at that workplace, and there aren't any shower rooms either.

I do this. I was told years and years ago that saying you were going to the 'toilet' was considered bad manners and vulgar and was pretty much the equivalent of announcing that you were going for a poo, and to say loo or bathroom instead. Many years later, I came across a gossip type internet article about the royal family which said they never use the word toilet and say lavatory or loo only (I have no idea what the source of this was and its probably rubbish anyway).

The toast instead of bread thing is pretty cute. Have you said it to her at all? Maybe her family always used the word toast? When I met DH, I remember saying something and wondered why he was looking at me really oddly. E.g. something similar to saying I was going to the slaughterer when I meant butcher. I had always said it that way because my family said it that way!

Teacakes are bread rolls
Currant teacakes are currant teacakes

"She used to call my ex neighbour H-Adrian no matter how many times I corrected her"

Pmsl. Sorry darling, just chatting over hadrians wall

Did she ever talk about Hadrian's Wall?

Possibly as she actually grew up very near it!

Hadrian/Adrian never said anything, but I would correct her in front of him.

PLEASE tell us what she calls toast. Is it toasted toast?

@Rubyupbeat

Why do these sort of things bother people such? Cripes, hope you never have a real problem!

Gawd. There's always one who comes up with this daft comment.

Not quite the same but yesterday I was reading an Australian website and they said "Rule of thump" instead of THUMB!

I was

Is "Rule of thump" the winner of a fight?

A survey by Onepoll.com has revealed the 30 most commonly misused phrases in the UK:

To be pacific (instead of to be specific)
An escape goat (instead of a scapegoat)
Damp squid (instead of damp squib)
Nipped it in the butt (instead of nipped in the bud)
On tender hooks (instead of on tenterhooks)
Cold slaw (instead of coleslaw)
A doggie-dog world (instead of dog-eat-dog world)
Circus-sized (instead of circumcised)
Lack toast and tolerant (instead of lactose intolerant)
Got off scotch free (instead of got off scot-free)
To all intensive purposes (instead of to all intents and purposes)
Boo to a ghost (instead of boo to a goose)
Card shark (instead of card sharp)
Butt naked (instead of buck naked)
Hunger pains (instead of hunger pangs)
Tongue and cheek (instead of tongue-in-cheek)
It’s a mute point (instead of moot point)
Pass mustard (instead of pass muster)
Just deserves (instead of just deserts)
Foe par (instead of faux pas)
Social leopard (instead of social leper)
Biting my time (instead of biding my time)
Curled up in the feeble position (instead of curled up in the foetal position)
Curve your enthusiasm (instead of curb your enthusiasm)
Heimlich remover (instead of Heimlich manoeuvre)
Ex-patriot (instead of expatriate)
Extract revenge (instead of exact revenge)
Self -depreciating (instead of self-deprecating)
As dust fell (instead of as dusk fell)
Last stitch effort (instead of last ditch effort)

I personally like "Nipped it in the butt"

Mothership4two

Great list. I have just realised that I have spent my adult life saying ‘intensive purposes’!!!

If she's in a hotel and at breakfast and they ask her if she wants toast, it must confuse the shit out of her, because they will bring her, well toast and not raw toast. 🤔

@Elieza
Her inaccuracies would rip my knitting too.

😆 rips my knitting!! Now that's funny!!

In the U.S., we definitely say bathroom--saying "i'm going to the toilet," just sounds too vulgar.
What do you call the thing you carry your wallets in? Purse, handbag, whatever? Where I come from, it is definitely a pocketbook.

@MrsA2015

We’ve been good friends for decades, I’ve corrected as much as I can without seeming patronising! At the end of the day she’s now a grown adult with children!

Her children are going to call bread toast as well, you know...

Teacakes are filled with mallow and covered in chocolate, tyen wrapped in red stripy foil.

Definitely not a roll and definitely no currants!

• On a tangential bread-related point...Dry bread to me means stale bread. But to my MIL it is fresh bread that isn't buttered. I only found this out when she accused me of giving the dc 'dry bread' with their soup. I was outraged that she thought I was feeding them out of date food. She just meant that I hadn't buttered it first.

Please tell me I'm right and she's wrong.*

Sorry, your MIL is correct here. Like dry toast is toast with no butter. Like when you're feeling poorly/can't keep anything down you might nibble on a piece of dry toast.

@Durgasarrow Are you northeast America? My family over there say pocketbook. I keep my purse(what I keep the actual money in) in my bag/handbag.

How does she make toast? Use the gorilla?

@Mothership4two I like circus sized

But I thought faux pas was pronounced for par, if not how is it pronounced?

@Durgasarrow

In the U.S., we definitely say bathroom--saying "i'm going to the toilet," just sounds too vulgar. What do you call the thing you carry your wallets in? Purse, handbag, whatever? Where I come from, it is definitely a pocketbook.

That’s my handbag. Though, I wouldn’t say wallet, I would say purse.

@Alongcameacat

Someone at my old workplace used to call the toilet the bathroom. "Just going to the bathroom, be right back." There were no baths at that workplace, and there aren't any shower rooms either.

I do this. I was told years and years ago that saying you were going to the 'toilet' was considered bad manners and vulgar and was pretty much the equivalent of announcing that you were going for a poo, and to say loo or bathroom instead. Many years later, I came across a gossip type internet article about the royal family which said they never use the word toilet and say lavatory or loo only (I have no idea what the source of this was and its probably rubbish anyway).

The toast instead of bread thing is pretty cute. Have you said it to her at all? Maybe her family always used the word toast? When I met DH, I remember saying something and wondered why he was looking at me really oddly. E.g. something similar to saying I was going to the slaughterer when I meant butcher. I had always said it that way because my family said it that way!

I never, ever say toilet. Always say loo.

For the guy referring to the toilet as bathroom. I'm guilty of that. I worked in the Middle East for years and a toilet was referred to as bathroom in that language. They had a word for toilet, but it was considered impolite to say in public. It stuck with me.

I have a few Eastern European friends who refer to sliced bread as toast bread because they don't consider it real bread and would only ever use it for toast. But it certainly isn't toast!

I feel like my polish friend does this.... Like it's shorthand for "bread for toast" because they wouldn't eat it any other way.

My partner has a peculiar thing where he uses oddly formal words in normal conversation...he calls the van a "vehicle" and "purchases items" instead of buying stuff

I've read the whole thread and still don't know what she calls actual toast.

And on a side note, I've been saying 'butt naked' wrong all these years

Never a borrower or a borrower be.

I know someone who says "second whim" instead of "second wind" and that left me with a lot of questions.