To not want DC to call teachers by their first name

[Eastie77]

Just that really. It's a new rule that will be introduced in their school next term. I suppose I'm a bit old fashioned but I think calling a teacher Ms/Mr x or Sir/Miss is part of school life. I'm actually feeling a bit sad about it. I suppose I'm just behind the times and am BU

In my dcs school they called the reception teacher by their first name and addressed subsequent years teachers as Miss (insert name)

Could it be that set up?

I think YABU
I work in SEN and Challenging behaviour/non mainstream settings where I have never been a miss boom..
It’s one of the reasons our kids engage, puts us on an equal footing etc.

I think that’s sad. When I was at school we had to stand up when adults entered the classroom and it’s sad that that has stopped too.

Boomclaps - I understand that. I suppose (again old fashioned view) I don't really want my children to see their teachers as their 'equals' as such. They are 4 and 7 years old. I'd be happy for their future 16-18 year old selves to view their teachers in that way but not at this age. I think it breeds over familiarity.

I grew up feeling respectful and sometimes slightly scared of some of my teachers (not saying the latter is a good thing) and calling them by their first name would never have entered my head.

I do accept I'm likely to be in the minority here.

My son teaches small children overseas and is known as Teacher ‘Firstname’ which I think is quite sweet.

formerbabe no, all teachers from nursery - to Y6 are to be addressed by their first name.

No idea if this is to to be extended to their headmaster. He is quite a formiddable character. I think DD will struggle to call him 'Peter' rather than Mr Smith (not his real name).

Personally don't get the Miss and Sir rule that itself is misogynist it certainly does not mean respect.

DDs school use the first name of teachers only. They also don't have uniform.

I doesn't seem to undermine the relationship or affect discipline at all, it's just the norm for them.

Also it definitely hasn't created a relationship of 'equals'. The children are very respectful including to the head who is known by her first name.

We lived in mainland Europe for a few years and the teachers were called by their first name. It was the practice across the country, I can assure you it changes nothing.

I think I agree with you op. It's a bit like when kids call their parents by their first name...feels a bit wrong.

It’s nothing like calling your parents by their first name.

And if a teacher needs to rely on being called mr or miss/mrs to command respect then there are bigger issues at play.

Are you the same poster who made the other first name post?

I would feel the same as you, OP. I still struggle to call teachers by their first name and I'm 44!

They do this is many Danish schools. The respect for the teachers isn’t any different. It doesn’t impact negatively on results.

I've been a primary school teacher for 12 years, and my current school uses first names for staff throughout. We've been doing it a couple of years now, and honestly, it's been lovely.
The little ones feel more safe and at home, and the relationships with the older ones are much closer and supportive. As a staff we've been amazed by the change such a little thing has had for the better! Even our head teacher goes by her first name now!

YANBU, teachers were always Sir and Miss when I was at school, needs to be an air of authority instead of like your mate!

I think mr/mrs/ms/miss is appropriate in school as is sir or miss.First names seem too try hard let-me-be-your-mate tbh

actually, curious - when people introduce their children to other adults who are acquaintances and not friends, do they say Mr/Mrs surname, or first name?

Had new neighbour round the other day and didn’t feel right to introduce to DS with first name so I said nothing 🙈

puts us on an equal footing etc.

Since when do teachers need to be on an equal footing with a five yr old?

@Boomclaps

I think YABU I work in SEN and Challenging behaviour/non mainstream settings where I have never been a miss boom.. It’s one of the reasons our kids engage, puts us on an equal footing etc.

That’s what’s wrong with the world. Teachers and people in authority shouldn't be on equal footing with children. No wonder there’s no respect for authority anymore.

At my last school (secondary) the teachers were Sir and Madam. I quite liked that! It was a tough school but the kids would call random adults they met outside school by Sir or Madam, too. Like a shopkeeper etc. Did wonders for school/public relations.

I think you really need to stop and question your prejudices here OP. I’ve been teaching secondary for 25 years. The respect comes from being a good teacher and being able to form relationships. Uniform, titles etc are just window dressing. I would be pleased if that was my children’s school. The important thing is what goes on in the classroom.

Just while we're on it, I bloody hates that DCs teachers would constantly address me as "Mrs Paper" rather than using my first name, which they knew! Rridiculous, in my 20s, having never been married that I have to repeatedly correct it.

And not that they didn't know, because they 100% did.

Boiled my piss no end.

@Musmerian

I think you really need to stop and question your prejudices here OP. I’ve been teaching secondary for 25 years. The respect comes from being a good teacher and being able to form relationships. Uniform, titles etc are just window dressing. I would be pleased if that was my children’s school. The important thing is what goes on in the classroom.

Couldn't agree more. My children called their teachers by their first names throughout primary - and didn't have a school uniform. They have both grown into lovely young adults with a healthy respect for authority. And had lovely relationships with their teachers. I think school should be a place of learning and growing and feeling safe to develop. Not somewhere where you are slightly scared of the teacher. How horrible.