AIBU to expect my DH to stop using my chargers?

[Rebecca980]

This seems soooo small and silly.

But I keep my two chargers for my iPhone 11 Max (model will become relevant!) And my headphones /kindle in a small box in my bedside table.

My DH CONSTANTLY nips in there to use them - despite his own chargers being wherever he left them in the house. Just mine are - apparently - more convenient at the time.

I’ve now - mainly as a ‘joke’ (but I do actually mean it) - written my initials in nail varnish on them.

The charger for my phone is much faster. And I have a proper system on an evening on charging headphones/kindle and then phone overnight.

It sounds so silly - and our ‘arguments’ over it are jestfull. But he thinks I’m being unreasonable to be annoyed with him rummaging through my drawers and taking my chargers. He thinks I’m also silly to have drawn my initials on them (even though I’ve done this as a ‘half’ joke).

Am I being a bitch? I guess my main argument is that our third bedroom is his office. His chargers are in there and he just can’t be arsed to get them!!!!!!

[Hiddenmnetter]

This used to drive me fucking mental. I was scrupulous about keeping my chargers in locations I wanted to use them (DW had her own chargers but kept losing them). Thank fuck I now use a different kind of charger. Except now my sister who uses the same type as me moves them as well 😡😤😤😤😤😡. If you use my chargers (which is fine) PUT IT FUCKING BACK WHEN YOU ARE DONE.

[honeylulu]

This is very annoying. We have lots of chargers in set places around the house but my husband and teenage son still move them and don't put them back. The other day I found 3 x identical chargers all in the kids' tv room.

The one that really annoys me is a three way charger I got as a corporate gift which enables me to charge my android phone, tablet and work iPhone all at once. I keep it in my study and charge overnight. It glows bright blue so I hate it in the bedroom as it makes it hard to drop off to sleep.

On more than one occasion I've woken in the night to a bright blue glow and found my husband has not been able to find his charger, gone into the study, taken all my stuff off charge and brought it into the bedroom to charge his ONE phone and to add insult to injury woken me up!

Don't even get me started on my hairbrush which he's always taking to do our daughter's hair, then leaves any old place. Then when I'm trying to get ready for work and not miss my train (pre covid) I'm running round the house like a mad thing trying to find it. Once it was locked in his bloody car!

When I moan he says I'm anal and possessive. But he's welcome to use my stuff - I just want it PUT BACK WHERE I CAN FIND IT!!!

[Herja]

Turn it in to a game OP. Hide them in a new place each week! I suggest in your knicker drawer for this week, perhaps a bathroom cupboard the next...

I know exactly what you mean. It's not a big issue, not causing problems, just annoying. So either ignore it, or make a joke of it. Don't let it become an actual problem in an otherwise happy relationship.

[OchonAgusOchonO]

I have no issue with anyone using my charger if I'm not currently using it. Kids' friends over and need to charge? Fire ahead. Dc, dh (although he uses his own) needs to charge? Fire ahead.

However, DO NOT MOVE MY CHARGER. It is plugged in in the kitchen. That is where I charge mine overnight. If you want to use it, fire ahead. But use it where it currently is located.

It took me loosing the rag a few times to get the message across. I have retrieved it from dc's friends (politely - on don't lose the rag with them) and told them it does not leave the kitchen. It now remains in the kitchen.

I think the issue is not so much him using it and more that he doesn't put it back. It's really rude and inconsiderate.

[nancybotwinbloom]

Buy more chargers. It's the only way.

[SkyeIsPink]

Solve the problem by not having the same brand of phone lol or get a few chargers for around the house.

I have a Samsung, DP has a OnePlus. They're both USB-C but I can't change my phone with his charger

I don't think this is a big issue though

[IwishIhadaMargarita]

We have a communal charger in the living room. Once thought my charger was missing and I couldn’t find it anywhere so I said to DH ‘have you seen my charger?’ He got really annoyed that I was ‘accusing’ him and asked ‘what are you trying to say?’ And I was just like ‘Erm where’s my charger?’ Then I spotted two chargers by his chair and said ‘is one if those mine?’ He had a quick backtrack and admitted he forgot he lifted it and yes he was being a dick! It gets casted you when appropriate. Get one downstairs and before you go to fed ask if he has taken your chargers so you can take them back.

[Mnhealth202020]

Does it matter how fast a charger is?

Yes. Faster chargers will charge high end phones (ie with large battery capacity) to 50% within 30 minutes. Basic chargers would take a few hours to reach that. Fast chargers have now become the industry’s standard.

I am in my 20s so grew up with tech & my phone is constantly in heavy use. I don’t have time to wait around for it to charge before I leave the house. I’m guessing you’re a homebody that doesn’t use their phone much, which is fine, but you’re not the target audience. Faster charging suits my needs so much that I’ve gone out of my way to purchase the set 3 times.

Seriously, life is too short to worry about stuff that costs a fiver wink

Errr, fiver where? I paid £29 x 2 (£58) for USB-C plugs, then £35 and £20 for 2m and 1m lightning to USB-C cables respectively. So I have a fast charger both at home and to travel with. Then I lost the travel set and had to repurchase Unless you’re buying some dodgy bootleg crap off eBay (that risks damaging your phone) there’s no way it costs £5.

This is why the op’s partner keeps using her charger over his, it’s the superior charger, and he can’t be bothered to buy his own so he’d rather leave her without!

[JoeCalFuckingZaghe]

@Rebecca980

Totally get that *@CustardySergeant* - it’s not serious lol. It’s just a massive gripe when I get snuggled into bed all the time, open my drawer and find my bloody chargers gone!

Then make him get them? Or move them so he doesn’t know where they are. He obviously doesn’t respect you enough not to do something you’ve asked him not to do which is more of an issue than the chargers themselves imo.

[TW2013]

Buy a slow charger put it in your bedside table. Hide your fast charger in your san pro box.

[VenetoResident]

My chargers are pink braided cable chargers.

I have a pencil case in my bag with headphones. a long charger lead, two short leads, an Apple Watch lead, a micro USB cable, a portable battery and a USB plug.

If they get removed without permission I get cross and everyone looks until they're found. They're just too lazy to walk upstairs to use their own. 🤬

[gutentag1]

I used to work in an office where I was the only one with a charger. I even bought them all cheap ones for Christmas, but they all took them home and continued to use mine! But I looked like a bitch if I said "no you can't have it, even though I'm not using it". Get your own!!!!

[GreenTulips]

Buy more chargers. It's the only way

Not he can buy the chargers.

If someone took something of yours and didn’t return it why would you buy them a new one? Marriage doesn’t mean you have to reward theft!!

[NotSuchASmugMarriedNow1]

Put it in your knicker drawer instead of your bedside drawer.

[happylittlevegemites]

Oh god, you are so not being unreasonable. I have three cables. I’m one lives in my vehicle, one beside my bed and one in my office drawer. Can I find them? Can I fuck. The only one I can reliably get my hands on is the one in my desk drawer, and that’s because it’s locked.

[LannieDuck]

It's not a joke, OP. It's really annoying. You need to let your partner realise it's actually pissing you off.

When you go to bed and open the drawer to discover the charger is missing, don't go and get it. Wake up your partner (or go and get your partner) and tell him to stop what he's doing and go and get it.

He's taking it because it's convenient for him and he doesn't care that you're being put out. So you need to start making it inconvenient for him.

[Shamoo]

I assume the issue isn’t that he is using your charger as such, it’s that he’s not putting it back - so when you go to use it it isn’t where it should be. That’s really poor and I would find it very annoying too. And no the answer isn’t that YOU go and buy him another. If he wants another he should buy his own. I hope you make him go and get it/hand it over every single time.

[TheHighestSardine]

If only all marital strife could be sorted out so easily as spending £50 on four or five chargers and scattering around the house.

[EatsShootsAndRuns]

Think I would carry my charger in my pocket all the time. Or if it's the sort with a USB cable and a separate plug have the cable wrapped around my wrist like a bracelet so it's not there for him to snaffle.

[minielise]

My partner yanks them out by the bloody wire and they break every few months, he will then by new ones and when I’m using one comment that he bought it... but he had to buy it because he broke both out old ones! It drives me mad

[TheGoodEnoughWife]

This would really piss me off. Luckily dh and I are on the same page and have our own which we wouldn't take each other's and a couple of spares.

For those saying it is no bother. It is. It is disrespectful for the op dh to just take her chargers without asking and without returning. It is also not OP responsibility to buy new chargers?! For goodness sake. The husband has the problem and he should sort it.

I would start making a fuss EVERY time he takes them. Make it more hassle to take yours than go and get his ;-)

[ButteryPuffin]

I would move something of his every time you find the charger hasn't been returned to its place after he's used it. His razor, car keys, whatever.

[FixTheBone]

Just get an anker powerport pd with a few ports on it and a few cables, enough charging for everyone.

Also, fast charging is good when you need it, but bad for the battery if you use it all the time...

[squeekums]

It would annoy me OP
Leave my charger alone ffs