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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

to think everyone should watch this - domestic violence predictors

3 replies

Suewiththeredford · 06/07/2020 16:45

Predictive factors

OP posts:
Suewiththeredford · 06/07/2020 16:45

This is on my mind as I try to leave my marriage.

OP posts:
MzHz · 06/07/2020 16:55

this is very good, BUT the transition from Stage 2 to stage 3 is WAY more subtle than this video implies, it can often take up to 2 years for an abuser to show the controlling side,

In contrast to the speed that is showing in state 1 the slow ramping up of control can take a very long time and be so slow and by such tiny increments that the victim doesn't realise until its too late and they have lost the confidence to walk away.

Often the sharpest shift in behaviour will be when the couple are engaged, move in, marry , get PG or have a child. any of these can trigger the escallation of control.

MzHz · 06/07/2020 16:56

Are you safe Sue? if you are at any risk at all love, just get the fuck out and get yourself to the police asap. Don't take even the slightest risk.

The most dangerous time IS when your abuser realises hes lost control.

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