Sex question

[damnthisvirusandmarriage]

If you refuse to have sex with your husband and then he sulks and tantrums is that Even remotely normal?

I get blamed for teasing him when I start to (been pestered into it) and then I’m so repulsed by it I just have to make excuses and stop. Then sulking and punishing me with not being helpful and jolly etc.

Back story to this. But just wanted to know thoughts.

Is this a one-off or do you mean you refuse to have sex full stop?

Is this a one-off or do you mean you refuse to have sex full stop?

No, my DH might be disappointed for a few minutes but he never sulks or has a tantrum - he's an adult and behaves as such. Same for me.

We understand that we don't always want sex at the same time, or all the time, that life is busy. Saying that, we will make time for each other to have sex, and sometimes it's even spontaneous!

Hmm, I think if it starts and you then put the brakes on it regularly I can see how he becomes frustrated and fed up.

If it's an occasional thing and he's going in the huff for not getting his end away then he is being unreasonable

Why do you feel repulsed by having sex with your hubby? It should be fun

It depends. Honestly, I think it's a bit cruel to continue to be married to someone who clearly wants to have sex with you if you're repulsed by them - especially when you've evidently not explained that or discussed that with them.

I think if you are repulsed by your DH it is fair for him to feel exasperated, rejected and hurt.

You've described a very dysfunctional scenario here and I think you both need to have a long and honest talk.

How long has this been going on? If it’s a long term thing and you have continually rejected him, I would say absolutely normal - his self esteem will be shot to bits.

A one off - no it’s not normal.

But the fact you say you’re repulsed suggests there’s a lot bigger issue here, this needs to be addressed first. What’s the back story

Why are you married to someone who repulses you during sex?

That’s not fair.

We’ve split up. He is abusive. Was just reading through the freedom project sex bit and wondered about this.

Also if I’ve said no to sex after being called a cunt continuously and yelled at there’s tantrums and sulking too. The silent treatment

You've split up but then you still engage in sexual activity with him before changing your mind and saying no?! That's really not ok.

I think OP is talking about past experiences...

I am reading this as OP is looking back at her ex's behaviour in the now finished relationship, and asking if what happened was normal or not.

Not that she is a 'prick-tease' or any other sexist description ffs.

I dont think the OP is still engaging in this behaviour FFS. I think she is in the process of coming to terms with what happened and trying to separate out what is "normal" and what isnt and certainly doesnt need abuse thrown at her

YEs OP this is part of what he subjected you and is abusive

No, it might show mild disappointment if we start and stop. It rarely happens because he would never pressure me into it in the first place.

He not it

Honestly. Some of the women on here are as bad as the abusive men themselves.

I’m reflecting on past experiences with my STBXH. Trying to make sense of it.

You’re so free of him op. Just read your update. Definitely not normal.Sorry you had to deal with that

You haven’t done anything wrong OP. I’m so glad you’ve left this abusive arsehole

Christ, this thread really is a misogyny magnet isn’t it?

No, of course it’s not acceptable behaviour. Appalling responses. Sorry OP.

shocking responses OP. no it's not normal behaviour at all - well done you for getting away from this person

literally wanna vomit in my mouth at phrases like "teasing"