AIBU... to cry about my skin?

[minipilling]

I have had acne my whole teen/adult life. Throughout my twenties I had it pretty badly on my face, chest and back. I couldn't wear anything that wasn't high necked.

I was diagnosed with endometriosis a few years ago and put on a low dose combined pill for treatment. It was great for me symptoms wise, but an amazing side effect was also the fact it cleared my acne after a month or so. I had spent years using topical treatments to no avail, and suddenly it was fixed. Not perfect, but the best it had ever been. My confidence skyrocketed, it changed my life.

Fast forward to a few months ago, I was getting migraines with aura, and I was taken off my pill. I had a break for a while and my spots started to return almost immediately. Plus my endometriosis symptoms were worse again. The doctor put me on the mini pill. This has been OK for the endometriosis (up and down) but my acne has increased hugely and is worse than it ever was. I hoped it would settle but it's been over three months. It's all over my face, neck, chest and back, causing scars, deep and cystic. The skin is rough and uneven. I feel like I'm in a nightmare whenever I look into the mirror. Pictures I took during my clear skin phase make me want to be sick, if would give anything to go back on my old pill but I know I can't. I don't know what to do.

I have been trying everything, salicylic acid, benzoyl peroxide, tea tree, charcoal. I am terrified I will look like this forever. I know it sounds vain but I have depression and anxiety and the acne makes everything feel so much worse. I have to keep taking the mini pill because my endometriosis is awful if I don't take anything. I am in my mid thirties and I feel so ugly and worthless. When the acne first came back I told my consultant because I wanted to be sure I could not go back on the old pill. He said my health was worth 'a few spots.' It made me so angry, I would kill to only have 'a few spots.'

I don't know if anyone has been in a similar situation or can give advice on what to do... I just feel so wretched now, I have a painful condition and I look a mess.

Thank you for reading if you got this far.

Hello OP, late to this thread and haven't read all responses. BUT -- do not accept your GP's indifference to the trade off you are making. The NHS does take acne seriously, in fact there is a whole NICE treatment guideline devoted to it cks.nice.org.uk/acne-vulgaris#!scenarioRecommendation

Read up on the NICE guideline, go back to your GP and insist on a referral to a dermatologist and care being initiated by the GP immediately. You can be offered topical retinols (Differin 0.1% or 0.3% in gel or cream form, or tretinoin cream) to make the skincells turn over faster and clear the blockages; antibiotics to reduce the inflammatory response to the acne bacteria; azelaic acid if you can't use retinols; and if roaccutane is needed, you will be referred to a consultant dermatologist.

Please do not waste your time and money with expensive over the counter products. Some of these, - like the The Ordinary's niacinimide or salycylic acid - are quite good to use when your skin is back under control and you are experiencing just normal levels of imperfections - a few blackheads, some hyperpigmentation, the odd spot. They are not designed to treat inflammatory acne, and persisting with them will just prolong your problems and make scarring more likely.

My son had mild but persistent acne, which only responded to six months of antibiotics. I delayed taking him to the GP because I thought - wrongly - that the NHS was not interested in any but the most severe cases of acne and that I could and should find our own treatments OTC. He has hyperpigmentation on his cheeks as a consequence of my delay - don't you do the same to yourself. Good luck.

No way would I use roaccutane. A dangerous drug. A friend of a friend who did not have poor mental health previously, attempted suicide after using it and attributes that downward spiral to the drug.

Please see your Gp and ask for a referral. My eldest has had acne all through teens and after endless creams, antibiotics etc we had a change of GP. He referred him straight away to a dermatologist. He said the pitting was deep and scarring his skin and he needed something stronger. He started Roaccutane (Isotretinoin) early this year and it is the only drug that has touched his acne. The others would calm it and then it would flare again. This has consistently reduced the redness and the pitting is now starting to heal. He has regular blood tests and checks but has been fine on it. He did have some extremely dry skin and lips (which is the drug working) but we got cream for this. A good skincare routine is also important but is not going to cure the acne if you have had it this long. Good luck.