Noisy kids

[Sunsetred]

We live on a Mews. No one has a garden and, as it is a private Mews the neighbours' children will all play outside. I don't mind the noise but there is one child who shouts all the time and it wakes up my baby. I get really annoyed as I have go through the whole saga of getting her back to sleep again. I want to tell the child to stop yelling but DH thinks I'm being dramatic. I disagree as I distinctly remember playing quietly outside so as not to disturb the neighbours and the neighbours shushing us if we ever did get to loud.

I would be more inclined to have a word with the parents than to speak directly to the child. If it really is constant, all day shouting, that isn't reasonable.

Go and speak to their parent and explain

Yabu. It's what children do. And it's your job as a parent to get your child to sleep be it once or a 100 times!
Shut your window if so bothered and use a fan.

You could speak to the parents. But in my experience, some children just have a louder natural volume than others and it would take a lot to get them to learn to lower their voice while doing something like playing outside.

This would annoy me too. I have three children and if they get too loud in the back garden I always tell them to take the volume down as other people want to enjoy their garden too and don't want to listen to kids screaming /fighting. My neighbour two doors up though let's her kids out at 7. 30 am and they basically screech all day and mother is nowhere to be seen. I don't think going to the parents will help though. Lots of parents think they are children let them play. It could cause more damage and make living where you are more difficult. I do feel for you though.

One of my 5 kids is so bloody noisy. Belive me, speaking to the child or the parents will only cause friction as no one can shut loud kids up. I have tried all sorts and she is still so loud I would gladly stick a gag on her if it was allowed. I feel for my neighbours, I really do but she won't pipe down. She is naturally noisy and she is only 3. The other 4 are much much quieter. Sorry OP. Suck it up.

Some children just are noisier than others. DS shouts a lot partly because of sensory issues related to ASD and partly because he can't hear very well, the combination means he doesn't realise he is shouting and even when its pointed put to him he can only manage to quiet down for around thirty seconds or so before his volume creeps up again.

When I was younger there was a green at the back of our house kids used to play on. Another group of kids used to play out on it and one boy ( who was 14 at the time) used to just scream on and off all day everyday until about 9pm at night. He didn't have any issues that would make him do this he was just messing around with his mates and being a pain ! I do understand how fustrating it is ! In the end a neighborhood meeting was called with the local counsillor and rules were put in place no playing on the green after 8pm, keep noise to an acceptable level etc so perhaps you could speak to yours or your local pcso see if the neighbours could all come to an agreement ? I'm sure it's not just you annoyed by this ! You can expect kids to make noise of course but sometimes it's just too much

I feel for you OP, it's the same by me. We live down the dead end of a quiet street, so there's few cars, other than for the few houses down here. And the neighbour kids are out constantly!

When we first moved here 9 years ago, all the neighbours were young-ish professionals... And now they've all had kids! So there's a gang growing up together aged from about 2 to 10.

Particularly when it's sunny, they're out there pretty much constantly from about 9am to 7 or 8 at night. Not being especially noisy, but, you know? Kids make noise without even thinking about it.

All you can really do is just shut the window.

What time of day are you talking about? It's more reasonable to speak to the parents if the child is being loud in the evenings I think.

Is your baby napping upstairs? If its causing a real problem you could try a white noise machine (I think you can get apps on your phone), it might deaden any sudden loud shouts from outside and stop them waking her up?

@Sunsetred
And one day this precious waking baby will be the one making all the noise, if indeed it isn't already!

it is rather unreasonable to expect anyone to 'tiptoe around' because someone has a baby no matter where they are. people are likely to tell you to jog on if you complained about noisy kids, building works loud et al because your baby was trying to sleep.

Why should the op be the one to make all these adjustments and concessions while the one causing the disturbance can just carry on?

You can make kids quiet down, you take them indoors.

I'd speak to the other neighbours and see what they think and then approach the parents of the noisy kid with new street rules.

ola street rules ? that'll go down well with most people being told what they can and can't do and within what times. some peeps couldn't even do it during lock down !

@OlaEliza if its during normal daytime hours then there isn't really anything the OP can do because a, children playing is never going to be mega quiet and is classed as a normal day to day sound and b, it's daytime so not unreasonable to expect some level of noise.

In addition to this we are still in some level of lockdown, lots of parents are still working from home, and there are limited options for alternative entertainment and location for children. The words "suck it up, buttercup" spring to mind. Yes its irritating when your baby wakes but there are ways around this such as naps in a room other than the one currently being used, a white noise machine, closing windows, etc. It is not reasonable to expect the world to hush when your baby is sleeping.

If a neughbiur approached me trying to impose "new street rules" in relation to the sounds if children playing then I'd be kindly inviting them to stick it.

Playing outside during normal daylight hours really shouldn't be an issue, and babies need to learn to manage noise. There's a difference between children playing out and people having loud parties until all hours or starting up the lawnmower at 7.30 on a Sunday.

As for street rules - if anyone tried to get me to sign up to that, I'd tell them the second word was off.

I have a good rapport with the kids who have been on the Mews for a while and prior to lockdown I'd let them walk to the corner shop with me, with their parents permission, etc. Rather than telling the one child not to shout maybe I could explain to them all that I have a sleeping baby and the noise can wake her up so maybe they can use their quiet voices outside our property.

I can't just shut the window when it's hot outside. Even with the fan on the room can reach 28 - 29 degrees. It's a small one bedroom maisonette.

I still think however, that his mum should make more of an effort to get him to lower his voice. I have heard her shouting at him to stop shouting several times 🙄 which doesn't help!

@Sunsetred

I have a good rapport with the kids who have been on the Mews for a while and prior to lockdown I'd let them walk to the corner shop with me, with their parents permission, etc. Rather than telling the one child not to shout maybe I could explain to them all that I have a sleeping baby and the noise can wake her up so maybe they can use their quiet voices outside our property.

I can't just shut the window when it's hot outside. Even with the fan on the room can reach 28 - 29 degrees. It's a small one bedroom maisonette.

I still think however, that his mum should make more of an effort to get him to lower his voice. I have heard her shouting at him to stop shouting several times 🙄 which doesn't help!

Why should the mother restrict his play and noise just to suit you? . If it's daytime put baby to sleep in a room the other side to the noise or would that then inconvenience you! . Fgs such entitlement. How about the neighbour tell you to stop your baby inconveniencing them as it most likely does?!

OP we have a very loud child nearby and it was driving us to distraction. He just shouted all day and it was audible throughout our house. It was making us really miserable so we spoke to the parents and asked really nicely if they could limit the noise a bit.

Luckily they weren’t like some of the posters here who feel that their DC must be able to freely express themselves 24/7. They have really made an effort and we are all on good terms still. I think they’d just got so used to it that they’d stopped noticing and it had never occurred to them that the neighbours might be disturbed.

@SoloMummy you sound like a very angry person. I have clearly stated that I don't mind the general noise but this one kid's noise level is way too high. I have not suggested that his play be restricted just that he uses his quiet voice outside my property and for a small amount of consideration to be given to the fact that there are others living here. Furthermore, I don't leave my child crying outside his window so I doubt it's unlikely she's bothering them much.

@Sunsetred
You're being unreasonable. You've bought in a mews Fgs yet want to live as though detached on your own private estate!
Get to grips. Living in a mews will mean that the neighbours DO HEAR YOUR BABY. A crept this then think, would you appreciate being told to shut it up as the infernal racket trawls from your open windows to theirs?
You don't own the outside of the property, so have no right to police it.

You genuinely need to get a grip.

If they've been going school work to date, how are you going to feel in a few weeks when schooling is over for most?

I think that if you say anything you'll seriously piss the mews residents off.

Either put up with it and move baby elsewhere in the day as I suggested or look to move.

My middle daughter is loud most of the time. I'm not sure if it's down to her autism, lack of hearing or she's just loud! Telling her to quite down works for about 30 seconds. I don't let her get too loud outside though.
I also have a baby, less than 2 weeks old and tbh I have just let him get used to noise. He'll sleep through shouting, meltdowns, the vacuum. Babies need to get used to noise otherwise you'll have to creep round them forever. Let your baby get used to noise. You can talk to the children but they'll probably forget by the next day or they can't regulate the noise.
It's a lot colder today so you probably won't need the window open. I know it's annoying but the children have the right to play. At some stage your child will want to play outside, how,would you feel if they got told off?

I was loud as a child op and now my DH tells me to stop shouting but I don't think I am shouting. I had gromits as a child (they fell out) and I think this is the reason I think I'm quiet but I'm actually not. It may be the same for the child (unless they are actually screaming) they may not realise how loud they are