To think you don't love your pets half as much once you have kids

[ishouldtryabitmoreachday]

We have a dog. We had him a couple of years before I had a baby. We'd had a previous dog together and my parents had a dog when I was in my teens. But I just don't love my dog like I did before I had kids.

My dog is looked after, he's walked twice a day, groomed and wormed, flea stuff and is part of the family. He goes most places with us, but I just don't have that love I had before I had kids. It's hard to explain, is it just me .. AIBU?

OP if you'd have only put you didn't like your child very much you'd have had a bunch of empathisers and handholds.

Substitute with partner

No way! I literally could not love my cats (which I had before the kids came along) more. The more time I spend with children, including my own, the more I appreciate my cats.

And that stray suggests something is not quite right to me.

Jesus H what a dramatic thread.

You should have said you love your children more than you love your husband. You’d have had all the sympathy.

I'm not entirely sure what you're trying to gain from this post.

Hmmm, I wonder. Could it be that OP is an attention seeking goady fucker?

But I'm prepared to be told he knows I don't love him now and would be better off with someone who's out all day and never walks him, but loves him with all their heart ?!

You’re making a false dichotomy.

Also the whole which do I love more thing is quite immature. As others have said there’s no need to start measuring love.

Sorry can't relate. Got dog after kids though , we adore him , I mean he drives me mad chewing and eating things he shouldn't but the bond he has with the kids is enough to melt anyone. My youngest son definitely loves him more than anyone else in the family 😂 I can't bear the thought he will die 😓 but op you're not a bad dog owner , I mean you say you don't love him as much , I think that's a protection thing when you have kids , as long as you treat him nice then that's ok :)

Ha. Just spend over a thousand quid on radioactive iodine treatment on our 11 year old cat (to (hopefully) cure his hyperthyroidism) This will bring his vet bills over the last few years to almost 3 thousand pounds. He’s as much a part of the family as the rest of us. I think DH might baulk at further bills but I will keep whipping out the credit card as needed. He’s my fourth baby (3 real kids plus him). So, in our case, no we don’t love him any less.

There is some very ott responses. The op isn’t neglecting her dog. Most people will say they are totally overwhelmed with the love they feel for their child/children and had not experienced such a strong feeling before

^This. It just is a different feeling and puts things into perspective.
We've got small pets, not dogs, but I know what you mean. With a newborn, of course they are an inconvenience. Doesn't mean we (DH) didn't take care of them.

I see the MN overreactors are here in force 🙄 fucking hell. YANBU OP.

Nope, can’t relate either. Loved my dog before kids- he was never a substitute child, I just loved him as a dog, but god I loved him. Made no difference when kids came along. I loved the kids MORE, absolutely, it’s a completely different kind of love, but my love for the dog didn’t change when they arrived (saying ‘loved’ as he’s not around any more)

Surely it depends on whether the owner treated their dog as a substitute child or not? If someone views their dog as a stand in child then I can see how they might change when they have children.

I adore my dogs and they are part of the family. Pre DC the dogs had priority, now they don't. They're not loved any less though because they were never bought to fill an emotional void.

You should have said you love your children more than you love your husband. You’d have had all the sympathy.

Glad I’m not the only one who thought this

Fucking hell. People comparing a dog to a "firstborn". It's a dog. Not a person. Oh no, OP loves the dog less, the horror 🤣

Absolute insanity but truly entertaining.

You maybe love him the same, just the love for your baby is so intense it makes it look like less love?

@CherryPavlova

I rethink our beast is a surrogate child for my husband now the children have mainly flown the nest.

Ours definitely is for me - or perhaps a surrogate grandchild since I’m never going to have any.

I love my dog more now than I did before! On maternity I spent more time with her - and when my DS is a pain in the bum I go to the dog for solace! She has saved my soul on many occasions.

But we are all different....

I am utterly gobsmacked at the posters who claim to love their pets as much as or even more than their children. WTAF is wrong with you?!

This thread is crazy. The op isn’t caring for her dog less in any way that the dog would care about (unless you think the dog really cares about his own Instagram or being thought of as a surrogate baby).

I love my dog way more than my kids. Your poor dog will know exactly how you feel, they’re very intuitive.

@icansmellburningleaves - ok, I’ll bite.

“I love my dog way more than my kids. Your poor dog will know exactly how you feel, they’re very intuitive.”

I suspect your poor children will also know exactly how you feel. They’re very intuitive.

@icansmellburningleaves. Your kids will know you love the dog more than them, kids are very intuitive. If your house was on fire would you save the dog before your children?

I am a member of a specific breed of dog club on FB.
Recently a woman posted a request for methods to discipline her dog as hitting him hadn't worked.
I responded saying that she was a disgrace and didn't deserve a dog. She told me to shut the fuck up!

I think that there are varying degrees of love for a dog.. OP still loves her dog but her child must take priority.

Just going to casually scroll back to the OP to double check that she isn't kicking her dog and starving it.....

Nope. Maybe this so why we have so many feral children. People don't know how to properly parent a human.