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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

AIBU - dog barking

60 replies

JoGP70 · 26/06/2020 12:57

Hi
I generally work 3 days from home in normal times but am currently at home permanently. As I'm effectively a businss at home i have deliveries 2 or 3 times a day. This means my (3) dogs bark for 10-20 seconds. Some neighbours occasionally let their dogs (whilst on their lead) come down our drive, as it's a shared one I can't put a gate on it to stop them. So say, 5 times a day they bark for a few minutes.

We've had problems with our neighbour and have had to report him a couple of times for harrasment. He's now effing and blinding shouting abuse either out of the window, in the garden or just in the house (when his wife isn't in).
I don't let them bark for any length of time as it's annoying to me too!

Is his behaviour reasonable do you think?

OP posts:
hotstepper4 · 26/06/2020 14:30

YABU sorry. Your dogs should not be barking 3 times a day even for that long. What if the neighbour was trying to have a nap or something? 2 dogs barking together makes a huge racket

Shamoo · 26/06/2020 14:37

Dogs bark. It’s annoying but 10 seconds three times a day is really not a lot. As long as you are demonstrating that you are trying to stop it when they do bark, so keeping it is as short as you possibly can, I wouldn’t worry.

letmethinkaboutitfornow · 26/06/2020 14:43

YABU sorry but that would annoy me!
Train your dogs please

DeeplyMovingExperience · 26/06/2020 14:44

3 barking dogs.
I wouldn't like to live next to that either.

WhatATimeToBeAlive · 26/06/2020 14:45

YANBU. Some noise is expected from neighbours. Opposite me is currently mowing a large area of grass and that is definitely lasting longer than the sum of your dogs barking.

And why is it that the first response is always so bitchy and negative? Who gives a shit if he might be having a nap? Does everyone else in the street tiptoe around with slippers on? No, thought not.

safariboot · 26/06/2020 14:49

That's not an unreasonable amount of barking. Persistently for hours on end especially at night is when it becomes unreasonable.

Sunnydayshereatlast · 26/06/2020 14:52

Invest in a keep your friggin ddog off my drive sign. Barking reduced already.
Yabu to give a shit about abusive ndn. If he was burgled you would likely be blamed for not having ddogs who bark effectively..

Northofsomewhere · 26/06/2020 14:52

While I understand barking dogs are irritating 10-20 seconds a few times a day triggered by outside activity (not just for the sake of it) is really not unreasonable. People who allow their dogs in the garden to just bark are far more irritating. I also can't imagine neighbours (except those sharing adjoining walls) can hear all that much anyway.
Dogs bark triggered by noise, often with multiple dogs one dog will encourage the other (or each other), this is normal and the OP is putting a stop to it as soon as she can. The neighbour is being unreasonable, is he going to do the same to every neighbour who has a dog that barks at the postie?

ttigerlilly · 26/06/2020 14:52

I don't think YABU
But then I absolutely adore dogs Grin
It's only barking, let dogs be dogs I say!

Fern204 · 26/06/2020 14:52

That really isnt an unreasonable level of barking. I have two terriers, great guard dogs, but they bark at most things. My neighbour has 3 dogs and they howl when she goes out. Cant be getting worked up about it. I would never leave mine barking for any length of time, but it is part of life. Dogs will bark.

Soubriquet · 26/06/2020 14:55

Meh...

People talk
Kids scream
Dogs bark. Simple as that.

As long as it’s not all day, I don’t see a problem

OldEvilOwl · 26/06/2020 14:56

Yanbu they can't expect silence living next door to people

Mollymalone123 · 26/06/2020 15:00

Dogs bark/ and they are not barking incessantly or for very long.i used to worry and get really anxious about if I was annoying my neighbours- I did ask them - half said dogs bark- and most of the neighbours had dogs- and my mum pointed out kids next door without dogs never stop shouting in the garden and did it annoy me? I said no as it’s natural for kids and they’re playing- she said well there you go!

Delbelleber · 26/06/2020 15:01

*Meh...

People talk
Kids scream
Dogs bark. Simple as that.

As long as it’s not all day, I don’t see a problem*

Exactly!!
He may be irritated by it but he is being unreasonable.

Littlepond · 26/06/2020 15:08

Oh I don’t know. I want to say it’s not unreasonable but we lived next door to a barking dog and it was awful - in fact we moved house partly to get away from it. It doesn’t sound like your dogs are barking for long but dogs barking is just such an annoying noise. Sorry.

letmethinkaboutitfornow · 26/06/2020 15:12

I live in a cul-de-sac, every neighbour has dog(s) - don’t hear any of them (young or old)
They think that the great neighbourly relationship is more important so they trained their dogs.
And we have deliveries arriving every hour!

WiddlinDiddlin · 26/06/2020 15:13

Barking for a few seconds in response to external noise like someone knocking on the door is fine, its not a noise nuisance, no matter how much some people will moan about it and say its unreasonable and that your dogs should remain silent, permanently.

Your neighbour screaming abuse at you, no matter what the reason, IS unreasonable.

If you have a glass front door that your dogs are seeing other dogs through and thats triggering yelling.. I would use frosted window film to obscure the view, this can really cut down on the 'barking at shit outside' issue though obviously does nothing to reduce them responding to noise.

Mittens030869 · 26/06/2020 15:16

*Meh...

People talk
Kids scream
Dogs bark. Simple as that.

As long as it’s not all day, I don’t see a problem*

I can't believe how many people complain about occasional barking these days, when it's only short-lived. It's totally different from non-stop barking, which is a sign of neglect and can be unbearable.

romdowa · 26/06/2020 15:17

A small bit of barking in the middle of the day is not unreasonable. Dogs bark 🤷‍♀️🤷‍♀️ if you had kids in your garden laughing and joking it would probably make more noise. Your neighbour sounds like they should head off to some rural back road if he wants to live in silence.

BrieAndChilli · 26/06/2020 15:21

We have dogs on either side of us plus across the road (thier back garden is opposite us) so it’s 6 dogs that bark all the fucking time. They set each other off, I would say they bark for up to half an hour at a time several times a day and sometimes at night.
We haven’t complained about it but if we ever manage to save enough money for a house deposit we will be moving ASAP and making sure new neighbours don’t have dogs!!
The kids hate it because when they go into the garden to play all the dogs bark at the fence so they end up coming back inside.

At work we are attached to a residential house and his dog barks and whines all day when he leaves it home alone.
MIL dog whines and barks when she goes to work if her partner isn’t home. (She had a nanny cam)

So in my experience dogs bark and fucking bark!!

lynsey91 · 26/06/2020 15:23

I don't think it is a problem at all. I have 2 dogs and they only really ever bark if someone knocks at the door. They almost always only bark a couple of times but if they carry on I tell them to stop.

It's not really normal for a dog to never bark and I want mine to bark if someone is at the door or if someone comes into the back garden. Had a couple of people just come into the back garden (apparently it's normal in the North!) and I want to know about it.

Neighbours both sides have a dog. Both small dogs and they yap all the time. Even worse on side has a young daughter who screams the dog's name out each time it yaps. So "yap" "dog's name" "yap" "dog's name" practically non stop sometimes for a good few hours. Drives me insane

reinacorriendo · 26/06/2020 15:25

We live in a cul de sac and the people 6 doors away have bought this small fluffy white ball and if someone slams a car door or farts the dog barks sorry yaps, the house next to them last 2 days has been having scaffolding put up so between that and the dog barking I’m actually loosing my mind today I can’t stand excessive noises, I get migraines and tinnitus so I’m utterly pissed off and the work men cannot as we would say at school use indoor voices.

Hollyhobbi · 26/06/2020 15:28

My next door neighbours have a dog and he's really quiet. The neighbours 2 doors further down have a small yappy fecker who barks all the time. I only ever saw them walk this dog once and I've been at home off work since the end of March. Their son who's about 16 is at home with the dog all day as schools have been shut since 12th March. He must wear earphones or something as I'd have gone insane by now listening to the dog, all day everyday.

Couchbettato · 26/06/2020 15:30

Are you looking at this through rose tinted glasses? Dogs bark, it's not unreasonable to expect them to do so as is their nature and people are allowed to have dogs, so if his expectation is that they should never bark, then he's being a huge asshole.

However 3 dogs is 3 times the barking. You say 10-20 seconds, but I have heard this narrative from others who own dogs, when in reality it's a fair few minutes and they've just gotten used to blocking the sound out where others haven't.

Also if they're small dogs their barks are worse because they're happy, higher pitched and the sound travels further.

Love dogs, have dogs, would not cope if I lived next to dogs that barked persistently.

Have you got a PO Box you can have packages sent to and be collected at your leisure?

vanillandhoney · 26/06/2020 15:33

Dogs bark - it's normal. People don't expect children to be silent all day long but when your dogs bark occasionally, you're suddenly the worst person in the world according to MN Wink