I'm adopted and recently found out that I am one quarter Sámi

[KolyaReindeer]

Name changed because I would never hurt my parents but what do I do with this information?

I am living proof that nature outweighs nurture as I have always had very specific interests that my parents and big sister did not share - mostly large animal/snow related. Bizarre but genuinely true!

Apparently when I was born I had blue black hair and I have very dark brown eyes and a very rare Rh Neg blood group too. Until I did a DNA test I just thought that these things happened randomly but I googled pics of Sámi people and one of them looked more like my sister than my sister does!

As above, what do I do with this info, how do I process it? I love my Mum and Dad and my Sister but I cannot help but think that my 'heritage' needs acknowledging as well.

I just had a quick Google as I admit I’ve not heard of this heritage before and it looks fascinating. Would your parents be upset if you wanted to look further into this? If I were you, I wouldn’t be able not to.

Did you do a DNA test on Ancestry as they generate DNA matches. There’s another good website to try which is Gedmatch where you can upload your raw DNA file (you can download this from Ancestry if they did the test for you) and compare it against other users and look much further into your DNA profile using various different DNA projects on the site. There’s also lots of DNA groups on there which you can join and compare your DNA against others who are, or believe to be, of similar background.

It’s addictive once you start!

Good luck, and I definitely think you should have a good look into this.

Nothing at all unreasonable about wanting to explore your heritage, but do you mean search for/contact your birth parents, or simply gain some knowledge of Sámi ways?

Didn't want to not reply. Do you not want your family to know you were researching your genetic past at all? Can't you say whilst they are your family, you were just interested in your genes. You could get them to do a DNA test too? DNA tests show geographic origins going back many generations- so your Swedish, Norwegian, Finnish or Russian roots could be quite a way back? It's possible your family may have roots there too? Did the DNA matching identify potential relatives as well.

That sounds tough for you.
How are you planning to acknowledge it?
Are you based in the U.K.?

You should definitely address and research your heritage. Maybe approach it with your family so it be s learning journey for all of you. You can understand your past without loving your family any less.

Sami culture is fascinating. I went to the Sami festival in Tromso years ago. It's usually spring time. A family holiday there would be a great way to make them feel they are an important part of this process.

Good luck!

www.msm.no/en/arrangement/samisk-uke/

Hi I'm an adoptive mum of a child with different ethnicity to me.

When you say a quarter Sami is that a DNA testing thing or have you identified a grandparent who is Sami?

I think that might make a difference in how you might want to process or move forward with it.
As an adoptive mum - yes absolutely your heritage should be recognised. Although my son's ethnicity is obvious, its very important that he has a positive sense of who he is. If you have a good relationship with your family, I'm sure they will be supportive.

What is your blood type, OP?

Half thinking of getting my daughters DNA tests for Christmas as my ex husband and mil don't know who my ex husbands father is. Also my ex husbands stepfather recently found out that he has a son and met up with him for the first time (nearly 50 years later). Stepfather and mil have no kids together and ex husband is an only child. Last year I discovered that my maternal grandfather was a widower when he married my granny. My own mother didn't even know this. My grandfather was in his forties and my granny was only 20 when they married. Would love to know if he had any other kids before my mother and uncles were born.

Do you know how your adoption was arranged, your local authority post adoption support team might be able to help you trace birth relatives.
You may also find it helpful to post on the Adoption board of mumsnet

I don’t get the issue. Surely your parents know you are adopted?

It’s not like you found out you’re related to a dictator or something.

@Gulabjamoon

Adoption brings out very complex emotions. Often adoptees are worried about upsetting their parents if start looking into their birth family.
My son is 16, we are just starting the journey towards him contacting and possibly meeting his birth mum. He loves me, he doesn't want tp hurt me or me to feel he is rejecting the life we have built together.

I'm adopted too. Don't quite understand your question tbh. Do you want to track your birth family?

How did you find out you were 25% sami? A DNA test? I'm curious about doing one. What was the other 75%? Just being nosey!

Like you I would be very interested in finding out as well as it is such an unexpected result. As it would be one of your grandparents I think it may be regarded as tracing your ancestry rather than your 'birth parents' and therefore not a threat to your real parents and sister.
Please forgive me but I can't help thinking your grandmother maybe did kiss santa underneath the xmas tree...sorry.

Have you watched Pru Leith's documentary that follows her helping her adopted daughter trace her roots? If not I recommend. Pru discusses how her point of view has changed, she knows she raised her child but that her daughter has every right to know her heritage, and she wants to do everything now to help her. Apologies if not suitable, but may help you with approaching the discussion with your parents.

Wow! Thank you all for your replies.

I'm in my early fifties so there is no easy way to get info. My parents have always been very supportive of me finding out and possibly contacting my birth parents but the box for my birth father is empty so that has always been a no go.

I grew up knowing that I was adopted but also believed that my birth mother was a 'gym slip' teenage girl that was taken advantage of by an older married man. Actually she was in her twenties when she gave birth to me and got married six months later.

I don't know if the 'gym slip' girl was a fabrication by my parents - my Mum told me that a nurse at the hospital told her this this but maybe was just trying to be kind to me. Both of my parents have dementia now so I'm not going to raise the subject.

I love my family, they are the best! and I would never do anything to hurt them but I have always felt... I don't know... maybe adrift would be the closest word?

My big sister knows that I sometimes feel a bit lost and am sick and tired of doctors asking "Is there any history of X Y or Z in your family?" so very kindly paid for a 23 and me DNA test.

Between that and my birth mother's family tree I have found my Sámi heritage but even with 23 and Me's DNA relatives my birth father is still a total black hole.

My DNA shows that while I am mainly British and Irish I also have Scandinavian and Finnish ancestors. I also apparently have "more Neanderthal DNA than 66% of other customers." I'm guessing that explains my mega hairy legs then.

@lljkk A Rh Neg - I used to regularly give blood but now cannot due to having Lyme Disease.

@hadtojoin That made me laugh, I'm betting (hoping) that she did!

Wow had never heard of Sami until tonight. Sad what happenned just like with other indigenous peoples, (have spent a while reading about it on Google.)

I hope you get to learn more of your culture, op.

@ClarkGriswoldsChristmastree19

Thank you. I've been trying to avoid tv programmes like "Who do you think you are?" because I find them very difficult viewing but I might give Pru Leith's a go because she has a specific aim in finding out her daughter's ancestry.

Are you in the UK, OP? My sibling and myself are adopted (different bio parents). I'm early 40s, and sibling is late 40s. We both traced bio family via local authority adoption services. If you know what county you were adopted in they should still hold the records so you can access your adoption file.

@KolyaReindeer does the first part of your username mean anything in the Sami language? The reindeer part is obvious anyway due to the Sami being reindeer herders. Don't despair because my ex husbands stepfather is 74 and he's only just met his biological son who wouldn't be far off your age. His stepfathers son lives in England but his stepfather is originally from the Middle East. I won't say where exactly as I don't want to give too much details.

I don't want to sound facile, but as an ex-librarian I tend to find books as a help with many things. Have you read "Miss Smilla's Feeling for Snow?" It's a long while since I read it, but I think she was half Sámi and a lot of the background of the mystery is related to that. Of course, I do apologise I've got the wrong book.

Is there any significance to the A negative blood type? That is what I have.

I think the character Smilla was Inuit from Greenland.

A- blood is not 'very rare'. About 7-8% of people in Britain and Northern Europe have it. In Britain that's about 5.6 million people. I have it.

@Tezza1

I don't want to sound facile, but as an ex-librarian I tend to find books as a help with many things. Have you read "Miss Smilla's Feeling for Snow?" It's a long while since I read it, but I think she was half Sámi and a lot of the background of the mystery is related to that. Of course, I do apologise I've got the wrong book.

Is there any significance to the A negative blood type? That is what I have.

Research seems to show A blood group people are more prone to coronavirus!

@OldOakTreeRibbon

I think the character Smilla was Inuit from Greenland.

As I said, it was a long while ago that I read it. Mid 1990s? I've probably read about 6000 books since then.