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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Aibu to take 6 week old baby shopping

74 replies

Mummachops · 23/06/2020 11:34

I have a 6 week old baby so he was born right in the middle of lockdown. I also have a toddler aged 4. Because of lockdown I’ve been unable to do the things I did in my first maternity leave I.e meeting up with friends, coffee, lunch , shopping and having play dates . I also can’t take my toddler to soft play, swimming or the park etc. Apart from walking I don’t really get out as there is nothing much to do. Now the shops are open would it be unreasonable to go with my brand new baby or am I putting him in harms way? We used to get told try to only go to the supermarket if essential and go alone . Now we are being encouraged to do non essential shopping and I feel it’s something I would like to do just to get out. However I doubt my toddler would wear a mask for any length of time or not touch it. I’m also worried about lack of toilets. Anyone else have these doubts ?

OP posts:
starrynight87 · 23/06/2020 11:38

I wouldn't risk, walk to a park.

theruffles · 23/06/2020 11:47

I wouldn't risk it personally. Maybe you could organise a visit to a National Trust/English Heritage kind of place where the grounds are open, so you've got more of a day out but a bit more distanced than the shops. Botanical Gardens are opening up too.

ILoveStickers · 23/06/2020 11:52

I don't think you'd be putting the baby in harm's way, but I think you've got to make sure it would be truly enjoyable for you. Check where there are toilets / baby changes / places to sit.

RuggerHug · 23/06/2020 11:53

I wouldn't.

Original poster
Mummachops · 23/06/2020 11:55

Just to add I’m actually more worried about my toddler as with the baby I can put the hood right down on the pram so he’s well protected. I also don’t drive so that limits me going to random places like national trust etc. As we are being told children are the least likely to get this virus surely I’m the most vulnerable but can’t isolate myself forever?

OP posts:
BeforeIPutOnMyMakeup · 23/06/2020 11:55

I wouldn't.

We aren't back to normal yet.

RedskyAtnight · 23/06/2020 11:59

Going out with a baby and a toddler is not much fun at the best of times. At the moment, when you'd have to be constantly watching to see if the toddler touched something, or got too near anything else, I can't see how it could be any fun at all.

Parks are still open - your toddler can still climb trees, build dens, play hide and seek, while baby watches ... all of which they would find much more fun than going shopping.

WinningEveryDay · 23/06/2020 12:02

I would, the longer you don't do anything, the harder it'll seem when you do decide to. Social distance, wash hands etc.

unicornparty · 23/06/2020 12:17

I probably would with a baby but not a 4 year old. As you say they won't wear a mask, won't social distance, will want to touch everything and will need regular toilet stops.

LadyMacbethWasMisunderstood · 23/06/2020 12:20

If you are more worried about your toddler then why would you do it? I absolutely would not take a toddler and a newborn shopping presently unless it was absolutely unavoidable.

JustC · 23/06/2020 12:39

I wouldn't. Can you order online, and just take them for walks somwhere not really busy?

AnneLovesGilbert · 23/06/2020 12:45

No. He hasn’t had any of his jabs yet.

Original poster
Mummachops · 23/06/2020 13:14

@LadyMacbethWasMisunderstood

If you are more worried about your toddler then why would you do it? I absolutely would not take a toddler and a newborn shopping presently unless it was absolutely unavoidable.
Because I would like to get out to do something for me. I haven’t been out in months and I know the country is starting to get back to normal. I haven’t even been to the supermarket as I was isolating due to being in the third trimester and have just carried on staying mostly home. I would just like to do something a bit normal. As I say I’m not worried about my baby as the pram hood covers him. Toddlers are going back to nursery and schools now. I don’t know when I can do something for myself. Im still so anxious about this virus but wonder if it’s just going to be this way now for months especially going into winter
OP posts:
Original poster
Mummachops · 23/06/2020 13:15

@RedskyAtnight

Going out with a baby and a toddler is not much fun at the best of times. At the moment, when you'd have to be constantly watching to see if the toddler touched something, or got too near anything else, I can't see how it could be any fun at all.

Parks are still open - your toddler can still climb trees, build dens, play hide and seek, while baby watches ... all of which they would find much more fun than going shopping.

At the risk of sounding selfish it’s just something I want to do for myself as my world is consumed by the children being at home with them all the time and not seeing anyone else
OP posts:
Mygoodlygodlingtons · 23/06/2020 13:18

I would stick to things out in the fresh air. Playgrounds are opening on 4th July, which would be good for your toddler.

A pram hood being pulled down is the worst of all worlds - both lack of air circulation and little protection for your baby.

Goosefoot · 23/06/2020 13:20

Can you get out to the supermarket without the kids? Or without the toddler and baby in a wrap?

It would realistically probably be fine to take them, but at the moment people are still pretty tightly wound and I suspect you'd find it was just stressful. I usually like grocery shopping but now with all the arrows and trying to stay out of people's way it just makes me tense, with a toddler in tow it would not be enjoyable.

Shinynewcoin · 23/06/2020 13:30

4 isn't a toddler?

Mygoodlygodlingtons · 23/06/2020 13:53

At the risk of sounding selfish it’s just something I want to do for myself as my world is consumed by the children being at home with them all the time and not seeing anyone else.

At any other time, I would support this. But not during a global pandemic.

BeforeIPutOnMyMakeup · 23/06/2020 14:30

@Shinynewcoin I googled a few months ago and read in a few places any child between 12 months and 4 (before they start school) can be considered a toddler.

AllesAusLiebe · 23/06/2020 14:57

I wouldn't, and I say that with understanding as someone who has been stuck at home with a nearly 2 year old. You say the trip is for yourself which is perfectly reasonable but it really won't be an enjoyable experience.

Also, if I was in a shop and a child got too close to me, ran into me etc, I wouldn't be happy and would question why they needed to be there in the first place.

20viona · 23/06/2020 15:05

I wouldn't.

Babyboomtastic · 23/06/2020 15:33

I wouldn't.

But even without Covid, your second maternity leave is very different from your first. The long lunches and meeting friends for coffee don't happen in the same way anyway. Second maternity leave is more about pushing a child on the swing whilst juggling a child on your hip as well.

GlassHouseYouGlassHouse · 23/06/2020 15:45

Going against the grain here, I would. The baby will be well sheltered in the pram and people will keep away from the pram anyway. There isn't a vaccination so the lack of jabs is not an issue. It will do you the world of good to get out and do something 'normal'.

Soph88888 · 23/06/2020 16:09

Children under 11 should NOT wear masks so please dont inflict this on your little toddler

Original poster
Mummachops · 23/06/2020 16:12

@Soph88888

Children under 11 should NOT wear masks so please dont inflict this on your little toddler
Government advice is for children over the age of 2 to wear them. Where did you hear they had to be over 11?
OP posts: