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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Aibu to think this may have ruined a friendship?

399 replies

Barobee · 20/06/2020 17:00

TL;DR friend’s boyfriend won’t get his car out of my garage and it’s pissing me off.

Longer version: two years ago a good friend asked if her boyfriend could store his car in my garage. It was supposed to be for three months max as he had just exchanged on a house so would be able to store it in his new house’s garage once it had completed.

I said yes as she’s a good friend and I don’t mind being helpful.

Two years on and the fucking car’s still there. I texted at the beginning of June to ask if it could be moved by mid June because I wanted to paint the garage and turn it into a room where DC could hang out a bit. Friend said she would tell him he needed to move his car. Two weeks later, at friend’s suggestion as he had shown no interest in collecting the car, I texted again to ask when he was coming. No joy.

I’ve just texted again today and said if it’s easier can she just give me his number so I can deal with him directly. Now the reply is that she’ll give me his number later because she’s got another child visiting.

At first I was annoyed at him, partly because I sometimes think he treats friend quite badly, but now I’m beginning to think that they are both taking the piss (him more than her) and this is going to impact badly on our friendship. AIBU and what can I do?

OP posts:
mencken · 20/06/2020 17:47

tell her that it needs to be gone by Monday or you will make arrangements for it to be collected as scrap. You are not having sex with the owner of the car and there's no benefit for you in storing it.

silly cows who let their sex partners leave junk in your house for TWO YEARS are no loss as friends.

Suzie6789 · 20/06/2020 17:47

They’ve Already ruined the friendship by being the CF I’m afraid. Give him a deadline like end of tomorrow or else it’s being moved forcibly.

FelicityPike · 20/06/2020 17:50

You know your “friend” has completely ripped the pish, don’t you?
Sadly I don’t think you can claim for storage fees as that wasn’t in your “contract”....neither was keeping it there for 2 YEARS!
24 hours or you call a towing company.

WhereYouLeftIt · 20/06/2020 17:52

She is not treating you as a friend. She is treating you as a convenience.

OutOfHours · 20/06/2020 17:53

If he won't move it ask for the keys so you can remove it from your garage for work to go ahead as planned

caramac04 · 20/06/2020 17:53

You can’t scrap it without the log book but hopefully if owner doesn’t collect you can get it bumped into Road.
They are seriously CF’s.

roses2 · 20/06/2020 17:54

What kind of car is it - any value left? MOT valid?

CalmdownJanets response is perfect!

CherieBabySpliffUp · 20/06/2020 17:56

Is she definitely still with the boyfriend? I can't think of any other reason why she couldn't have given you his number when you asked.

La1ka · 20/06/2020 17:58

Could you tell her that the redecorators can’t move the date and you will lose a deposit if it isn’t moved and you’re ever so sorry, but you will have to get it removed if he doesn’t come and get it? It’s a bit of a white lie but...

Ginkypig · 20/06/2020 17:59

Don't fucking tell her you need to know incase you need to postpone the work!

Tell her the work starts on x date if the car isn't gone by day before then you will have it carried out and left on the street for him to collect.

It will be illegal to be on the street as I assume he hasn't kept up to date with tax mot insurance etc so if he doesn't want it seized he will have to come and get it.

Mumoblue · 20/06/2020 17:59

Your friend is being a bad friend (and her boyfriend is being a jerk).

Give her a deadline, then push it out to the street and report it as abandoned.
If you lose your friend because her boyfriend acted badly, she's not a good friend.

wildone84 · 20/06/2020 18:00

This sounds like a tricky situation but you need to give her a deadline.

E.g. "they are starting the painting of my garage on X date so it absolutely needs to be gone by then. If he is not able to pick it up, I am going to need to scrap the car at his expense. Sorry it has come to that but I see no other option if he won't come and pick it up."

wildone84 · 20/06/2020 18:00

And I agree that it is not OK to postpone the work on your garage. Don't even present that as an option. This needs to be a hard deadline you give them.

whiteroseredrose · 20/06/2020 18:02

Can you get it towed to near where he lives?

SDTGisAnEvilWolefGenius · 20/06/2020 18:02

Yep - break the window, take the hand brake off and push it out of YOUR garage, @Barobee.

Barobee · 20/06/2020 18:06

I’ve got his number now. Do I phone or text?

OP posts:
Standrewsschool · 20/06/2020 18:07

I’d phone, and then you’d get a response straight away. I would give him a date for it to be removed by.

Atthebottomofthegarden · 20/06/2020 18:10

Call. Plan your opening sentence!

BernadetteRostankowskiWolowitz · 20/06/2020 18:11

You are being far too fucking soft.

Zhampagne · 20/06/2020 18:11

Call, then follow up with a text reiterating the deadline.

Have you checked the DVLA database to see if it is SORN? How well do you know this guy? It could be stolen for all you know.

LokisLover · 20/06/2020 18:11

I’d text, then you’ve got written evidence of whatever is agreed so he can’t say one thing then do another.

TommyShelby · 20/06/2020 18:11

We have exactly this problem with a load of furniture of a friends sister. She has been told multiple time’s that the garage wasn’t suitable as it is an old leaky building but she wanted it stored there anyway. As a result the furniture is entirely covered in mould and the wood is warped. She’s been told this and I am past the point of caring

LokisLover · 20/06/2020 18:12

Actually do what Zhampagne says

MzHz · 20/06/2020 18:12

@Barobee

I would like to keep the friendship if at all possible and so I’m reluctant to up the ante.
2 years?

That friendship hope you have is a ship that set sail loooong ago.

Tell her it’s gone by the close of the weekend or you’ll get it towed for scrap.

BernadetteRostankowskiWolowitz · 20/06/2020 18:12

Text so you can keep proof of convo.

"Hi CarFucker, I need your car gone from my garage within 48 hours as I've a decorator coming. Please let me know what time you will be here so I can have the garage open for you"

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