"Well, Liam and Alex go to school, but you just let us stay home"

[letsgoschool]

Is what my 7 year old DS said to me today. I’m one of those parents who chose to keep my children at home even after the school had opened. They speak to the neighbours kids when they are in the garden, some of their parents are key workers and have been at school from day one, others are not and were sent back to school when they opened.

DS knows about the coronavirus as he watches the news and we’ve spoken about it. In the beginning he understood, and was ok with it but as time has gone on and he’s seeing the neighbours kids go to school, he says “ well Liam and Alex go to school, and they don’t get sick. Why can’t we? But you just keep us at home”

It broke my heart, I didn’t even know what to say. How do I explain this?

I had a life saving operation just before lockdown & I don’t want my dd to go to school, but I have reluctantly agreed because she is very keen to return. Do whatever feels right for you & your family.

I am glad that my sons school have no spaces available and that his year 5 not 6. His dad is a key worker but I am not. I would tather be home looking after him but that's because he has anemia which causes him to pick every little bug going up. So whilst he is not down as needing to shield him we are basically keeping him home and only taking him out to walk the dog in a big open space to be cautious.

Oaktree55

"Exactly this! Biggest opportunity to teach our kids to be confident, independent they’re ever likely to get during school years."

Erm... how does keeping kids out of education and away from their peers equate with teaching them to be confident and independent?

@Oaktree55

I was referring to fact that OP discovered Only today that not all year groups have returned

People are being unreasonably critical, OP. I’ve made quite a few bonkers mistakes during lockdown as I’ve been preoccupied with the change, full on childcare all day and stress. Your situation is completely understandable.

We all know the virus is very new, Oaktree .
Trying to frame continuing to keep your children home from school as a magnificent opportunity for them to gain confidence and independence sounds bonkers, frankly.
Pure nuts. They've all been at home for three months already 😂

@thepeopleversuswork

Oaktree55

"Exactly this! Biggest opportunity to teach our kids to be confident, independent they’re ever likely to get during school years."

Erm... how does keeping kids out of education and away from their peers equate with teaching them to be confident and independent?

Obviously lost on you!

Personally I'd send him back in, kids can't miss their education for ever - although I know it's tough to re-start.

Oaktree55

"Obviously lost on you!"

Clearly it is, yes. Do elucidate please?

TriciaH can’t your son’s anaemia be treated?

Oh fgs! I love those sort of retorts; "well, if you don't know I'm certainly not going to tell you!!"
Boring...

@Oaktree55

Lost on me too.

lets hope your ds watches the news more closely than you do!

At least that's a simple answer for you.

My 7 and 9 yos know that they've been off school for 3 months to reduce spread of the virus. They know some children have been in throughout for childcare. They know that their year groups can't go back yet because their teachers are doubling up to teach half-classes, but as soon as their school has places for them, they will return.

Just give a simple, honest reason for the circumstances.

I’m astounded that people let 6/7 year olds watch the government briefings. It’s not appropriate to let small children hear cold hard information about illness and death in a format that is designed to communicate such information to adults. Explain what you need to in an age appropriate way but I really think children should be protected to some degree from the barrage of upsetting and stressful news that we are subjected to at the moment. No wonder there are so many children out there with massive anxiety issues. Let kids be kids, they don’t need this stuff piled on them and you have no idea how it might be affecting them

@Oaktree55 you may want to send your kids to a better school (I say this as someone who doesn’t really buy into the whole school concept per se). If your child is lacking the opportunity to learn confidence of independence their school must be particularly shit.

Just released his year group hasn't even gone back yet 🤣 at our school, it's only kids from reception, year 1 and 6 that's gone back. Our neighbours kids are in year 1, DS is in year 2. I'll tell him that tbh, thanks

Please don't say that alone, he's already asking because he feels devalued and unappreciated by the school, demonstrating to him that school values YR/1/6 more and will welcome them and not you is not sufficient explanation, it's more likely to lower even further his esteem and relationship with school.

Similarly of course you can no longer use any sort of safe as an example without him either not believing you 'cos how can it be safe for his neighbour peers, or becoming very worried for his peers being exposed to the unsafeness.

@Rainycloudyday

Well the neither the OP Nor her son were exactly watching closely given she discovered this afternoon that her son’s heat group nOt even returned yet.

Also meant she’s not read anything from the school about it either.

Or read a paper or been on mumsnet!

Most odd

I sent my DS back.

My DD is at home. She understands that school is still shut for her year group.

She also knows that we have a crap govt and that it's one of the reasons.

And that BJ is bad bit not quite as bad as Trump.

She is at an age where she picks up everything even if she is not actually watching the news.

I don't believe in sugar coating and she needs to know what and who we have in charge.

I remember knowing that Maggie was very bad for where I lived.

[quote EmperorCovidula]@Oaktree55 you may want to send your kids to a better school (I say this as someone who doesn’t really buy into the whole school concept per se). If your child is lacking the opportunity to learn confidence of independence their school must be particularly shit.[/quote]
obviously struck a nerve with you. I’m sorry I know it’s easier for some just to not look into the detail of things 😆

Do people really live in such a bubble where they don't know what is going on in schools and which years are allowed back, especially when they have children? Dubious.

It didn't "strike a nerve" with anyone, Oaktree, it's simply that nobody knew what on earth you were on about and you seem completely unable to explain.
The logical conclusion is that you're talking bollocks.
ing at people rather than answering a simple question doesn't make you look any brighter, I'm afraid. Quite the reverse.

With some children they are very astute at picking snippets up and it is better to be more direct and open than letting their imagination fill in the gaps. Mine have wandered in while watching daily briefings and it's better explaining to them what it's about than dismissing them, "yes 100 people's deaths have been reported which is sad, but that's going down a lot and many of those people were very old or poorly and didn't have long to live. We are young and healthy so it's very unlikely that Coromavirus would make us very poorly, but school is still shut to help stop people spreading it to others".

It was on children's radars from the start because it was talked about in school when they dropped assemblies and events through March

DS is YOUR child, not the teachers, not the neighbours and not the government's.
If you are not ready for him to go to school, you stick to your guns.
You know your child the best and have the right to choose their education etc. He's not suffering, it's not wrong to keep him away from school it's just different.
You are doing the best for your family and your answer should be "because I'm the parent and I said so" .

She's not keeping him from school. His year group aren't back yet. It's quite simple...