To be feed up with school telling me what to do and how to do it?

[ivykaty44]

Had a letter home from my dd's school last week telling me that they would be sending a booklet home telling me what I should be giving my dd for her packed lunch. I do know how to make a healthy pack lunch, including three portions of fruit each day in the pack lunch.

This week they send me a letter telling me that it is tantamount to being a criminal if I so much as dare to even think about taking my dd out of school during term time - I havn't even asked (standard letter to take home)and my child may be excluded from school if I go on holiday in term time.

The letter really does seem to have this attitude of "we have the power to make you" and I really don't like it I am not a child, I can look after my dd and give her healthy food and take her on holiday during school closures. I just want them to leave me alone and get on with teaching my dd........ rant over

No problem with letters. If you don't want to read them, recycle them. My bugbear is the whiteboard outside reception to pass on info to parents. Often includes a list of children whose parents don't pass muster in some way - ie the following children still have not brought the form back for X' followed by a list. Or 'Will parents please ensure that all children bring the correct PE kit. Etc. It niggles in a way I can't quite justify.

communications experts, bella?!

Goodness, it only takes common sense and perhaps a coupl eof training courses at most.

I'd be interested in how we can do better.

Suggestions please.

I think it's better to give out a weekly/fornightly newsletter which might include a section of lunchboxes with perhaps some suggestions to make them healthier. Rather than a letter telling the parents what school policy is. Unless the school is intending to confiscate all the biscuits and crisps and the letter is seen as fair warning of course.

can do better by changing the whole tone of the communication, getting rid of any patronising overtones, by not making people feel like they are being told off.

Parents are adults and have to be treated as such.

Similar to Orm's point about whiteboard.

exacylt, orm. I don't think schools should be 'telling' people what to put in lunch boxes. They are adults. They do have a choice.

Sometimes, a softer communication (such as the recipe leaflet) is far more appropriate.

If you tell people what to do, it's much more likely you will just get a negative reaction.

Ah but ds's school does the 'lunchbox suggestions' thing. First it was full of things that people apprently had no time to prepare , and then when that criticism was taken on board it was then full of prepacked food .

Can they win?

Our school bursar and the new clerical asst are both lovely people.

As are the staff at our Dr's surgery.

Letters have to be sent to everyone, and staff don't pick and choose who letters go to. Communication could often be better, but ime most letters are done on the hoof, very quickly and often at the last minute.

Some parents will completely disregard everything that is ever said or written to them. Some parents lap up every piece of information. Some parents are affronted by every piece of information. Most are a mix.

Our school bursar and the new clerical asst are both lovely people.

As are the staff at our Dr's surgery.

Letters have to be sent to everyone, and staff don't pick and choose who letters go to. Communication could often be better, but ime most letters are done on the hoof, very quickly and often at the last minute.

Some parents will completely disregard everything that is ever said or written to them. Some parents lap up every piece of information. Some parents are affronted by every piece of information. Most are a mix.

oops!

Nothing to do with pussyfootomg to stop afffronting people. It's to do with treating adults like adults. And accepting there is only so much that you have total control over.

omg....my boy is only 7 months and im dredding him starting school already...r they all like this?

Can't beat the letter home from school the other day.....

"We are doing a project on blah blah blah, please bring an X in on Tuesday. I hope this is clear enough but if not, please feel free to give me a call"

I mean W.T.F.

Bring X on Tuesday.

How much clearer could it be without the head just drawing ruddy pictures

Clearly the head thinks us parents have the IQ of cheese.

Tone is very difficult when you are communicating with parents who are poorly educated - often you do have to write as you would to a child. Same for parents who speak little English (we have 14 languages spoken at our school).

A recipe leaflet for a parent who only speaks Czechoslovakian - well it'd be all Dutch to them wouldn't it?

letters about lunches, snacks, holidays are so commonplace in schools that there is no excuse at all for claiming 'oh it was done in such a rush'. They come up every year so worth spending time on.

Oh I'm sure someone will call mtpw. Believe me.

Parents (also adults) should respond in an adult fashion though too.

There's a major parking issue at the school (isn't there at most schools?).

The Head has repeatedly tried to politely tell the parents that it's a problem but certain parents completely disregard the letters.

How? Why? Eh?

"Just calling about that X you asked us to bring on Tuesday, do you need it by Wednesday then?"

"That project on cheese, I don't have any, could I send him with a bicycle instead?"

Usually it's 'I've lost that letter you sent about Tuesday. What is it I have to bring? And could I bring it on Wednesday instead?'

Our school sends home a note not to put chocolate or crisps in pack lunches. But the school dinners come with a a pudding every day. (sticky toffee pudding, apple crunble with custard, etc.). It does seem as though they aren't playing by their own rules.

In fact I think I'm going to give the school dinners a miss based on the huge desert every day.

Why do children need desert every day???

And they serve manke processed meats. But, if I put peanut butter or any other nut inher lunch box, oh they would be up in arms. Hey, nuts are nutritious.

So I agree with OP. But, I'll play by the rules.

As for the school attendance geschtapo, it just encourages parents to call in sick, hence teaching their kids it's okay to lie.