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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Am I being really unreasonable re neighbours

122 replies

Mightymaniac1 · 15/06/2020 22:19

Sorry... it’s a neighbours one!

But I do really want some perspective on this situation as my partner and I are getting quite frustrated...

Recently bought new house on newly built road. It’s a road of only ten houses all privately built and we love the house and it has been very plain sailing so far. We get on well with the neighbours next door.

However there are lots of young children along the row of houses and as you can imagine with small new build newly sown grass their gardens are not giving them much entertainment during lockdown or even before then.

We have up to ten children scootering/cycling/roller blading up and down this private road, outside our front door etc. Quite noisy and a bit annoying but we aren’t heartless and know we cannot stop children playing outside our front door all day and all night.

However there is always a bike or a scooter (or tonight a helmet and a bucket) just left pretty much outside our front door.

Not sure we can do anything about it? But are we being un reasonable to be annoyed that we spend a great deal of time and money to make our house look nice but can not control a load of kids stuff being left by the front door. Or cannot reverse out of our space for fear we can run over several children flying around without any parental consideration.

Advice and opinions requested please!

OP posts:
Bluntness100 · 15/06/2020 22:22

Kids toys don’t make your house look unpleasant. Do you not have a front garden? Your door opens to the road? If it’s a private road no one sees it but the neighbours any way

AvoidingRealHumans · 15/06/2020 22:22

Yes yabu. These new builds are pretty much aimed at young families so there were always going to be children playing out at some point.
More so now because schools are shut and children can't go anywhere.

As for the toy situation I don't know what you can do. Approach the neighbours and moan about a bike helmet being left outside your house?

Original poster
Mightymaniac1 · 15/06/2020 22:22

Should add we have things like constantly cycling over the growing grass, gathering around the car so we have to ask to move so we can get to it and bits of their litter thrown by the door... so to anyone reading this thinking lighten up it’s kids playing, there are a few issues to them constantly being in our space

OP posts:
Bluntness100 · 15/06/2020 22:23

Did you vote you Were not being unreasonable 🤣🤣🤣

Original poster
Mightymaniac1 · 15/06/2020 22:24

No I think I likely am being unreasonable and ready for the opinions, it will help me gain the perspective I need!

OP posts:
Raella50 · 15/06/2020 22:25

You have bought a house with. Lose neighbours and you are annoyed they’re are neighbours encroaching on your enjoyment of the shared private street. YABU

Windyatthebeach · 15/06/2020 22:26

Ime new build estates are full of dc who use the entire expanse as one huge play area..
Best thing we did was get a huge puppy.

Kept our garden for just ourselves!!
Grin

Raella50 · 15/06/2020 22:26

Close neighbours

Original poster
Mightymaniac1 · 15/06/2020 22:28

Thank you so far for responses! Just to clarify I am friendly to the children and don’t expect to never see them, but them constantly being outside the door and leaving their toys there when they don’t live here is a bit much at times.

OP posts:
TARSCOUT · 15/06/2020 22:30

Definitely not being unreasonable but new build estates are generally for families with kids. Put a fence and drive gates up.

Raella50 · 15/06/2020 22:30

It’s highly unlikely this will continue once schools are back but just sick it up until then. Be kind and if you find things on the end of your driveway just place them to the side out of the way. This will pass and perhaps they’ll only be playing like that in summer holidays in future.

Original poster
Mightymaniac1 · 15/06/2020 22:33

There is a bike on our driveway right now 😂 these kids don’t think of it as a road so somebody would have to move it if driving out. Not room for gates unfortunately. Good point about new build estate I suppose with it being a private road of not many houses you don’t expect it quite to the extent of a big development with a park etc. Could be much worse and I appreciate the responses! Just quite house proud (first house purchase) and not feeling guests dodging a dozen zooming bikes to get to the front door! Sounds bad I know.

OP posts:
ToBBQorNotToBBQ · 15/06/2020 22:34

This would annoy me OP. If you have kids of that age it would not annoy you. If like me your kids are big it would be bloody annoying. I would sweep the toys away from my door with a broom 😂😂

EnidsCrochetCorner · 15/06/2020 22:34

I think it is rude for children to leave their toys on your property. I would have a friendly chat to the neighbours and ask them to ask the children to stay on their own properties.

Re the scooting up the road, better than having a teenager with a motorbike riding up and down the road all day.

AllesAusLiebe · 15/06/2020 22:37

I’m also going to stick my neck out here, OP and say that would really annoy me.

I’m not advocating this as a suitable response, but I’d go out and move the toys away from my house.

Do you have a good enough relationship with the neighbours to ask them to keep the stuff away from your house?

Original poster
Mightymaniac1 · 15/06/2020 22:39

It’s tricky because we sometimes don’t know what belongs to who. We don’t know the neighbours that well and I really hate to be confrontational and fear I would appear snobbish, as I’m sure I already do. Thanks all for responses

OP posts:
Ontheboardwalk · 15/06/2020 22:47

Kids in my road annoy me, me as a kid no doubt annoyed my neighbours, sorry OP it’s part of living in a street. I’d love to live in the middle of a 5 acre plot

Only time I was pissed off when group of kids were having a "who can scream the loudest' competition in front of my house. Asked them where they lived they said next road along but their parents had told them to move as they were making too much noise. They got told to move along

Can you fence off your property or ask them to respect your boundary?

Original poster
Mightymaniac1 · 15/06/2020 22:50

Very good point. Went from my parents’ five acre plot to a lovely flat in a very quiet area. It’s just a shock to the system and I’m sure I’ll get used to it as part of the community feel of buying a house. Thank you again for responses

OP posts:
MsJaneAusten · 15/06/2020 22:52

It sounds lovely! I’d love to live somewhere the kids could ‘play out’

3girlsmama · 15/06/2020 22:54

I think you should mark your area in some way, I can't really picture the layout but can you do some kind of separation of your area from the rest?

FreddoFrogAddict · 15/06/2020 22:54

Been there, done that. Cul-de-sacs went on our list of locations to avoid when buying another property, along with shared drives and water courses.

2020hello · 15/06/2020 22:56

I would def be moving stuff off of my drive onto the path next to the house/drive where they were left. You dont need to know who owns them just move then off of your property.

I have children I hate the noise my boys make in fear of annoying the neighbours it is what it is but if they left there things on someone else's drive that is not on. We are in a road of children and everyone keeps their things in their own places. Not spread all over the place in the street.

jgjgjgjgjg · 15/06/2020 22:56

Move any toys left by your front door to the public pavement. Each and every time. Fence off your bit of grass with low fence and signs saying "new grass - do not walk on it" or similar, and make a big show of watering it frequently. Every time you want to go out ask all the children to move out of the way by a good margin - even if you could possibly squeeze out. They'll soon get the message that it isn't a good place to stop.

gutentag1 · 15/06/2020 22:57

If anything gets left on your property/in your way, hide it in your garage for a few days and then leave it somewhere else on the estate.

2020hello · 15/06/2020 22:57

Their things not there things.*