Sorry I didn’t know where to post but would really appreciate some advice and perspective.
10 months ago I crashed my car into another car at a crossroads. I didn’t see the give way sign which had partially been tarmaced over and got out and admitted complete liability on the spot. It didn’t and still doesn’t matter to me that I did this. I knew it was ultimately my fault and I didn’t want to play games. Just got background, all the neighbours cane out (it was in a residential area) and were very helpful to both me and the other driver and said this had been the fourth or fifth time this had happened in months on that spot and that nothing had been done by the council. Later on whilst I waited for a car to be towed, a woman came up to me and asked if it was my car in the accident and then said she’d had the same accident a few weeks earlier although she was the other driver in that situation.
Sorry, I just want to give all this for background.
The other car involved in my crash flipped over and the neighbours had to upright the car. Amazingly the man walked out with not a scratch apart from a small cut to his finger.
The police and paramedics arrived and he was taken to hospital but later discharged once they looked him over.
He was very upset and angry with me at the time and his wife came to the scene and she said as long as you’re both ok that’s the main thing. I spoke to him and his wife the day after and he was feeling much happier, said my insurance had been in touch and he was pleased they were giving him a courtesy car and he was fine. All good.
Yesterday I had a phone call from his wife. He died last month. It was very upsetting, she opened with you killed my husband, then she said the crash caused his cancer. As we spoke, she said he had bladder and prostrate cancer on and off since 2006 but that the crash weakened him and he was unable to fight it off this time and he died in much pain. She said they had not received much money from the insurance and than the funeral had been very expensive. She said the doctor had told her the crash had led to his death due to muscle weakness and she was crying on the phone and said she was very lonely.
I feel shell shocked and very upset. I’ve offered to go round and see her today and she said ok. She doesn’t live very far from me and I also told her she can call me anytime to vent at me if she wants and that I’m so sorry.
But everyone I’ve spoken to says I must not go round and must not engage with her. This seems very harsh and I just don’t know what to do. I was going to just stand on her door step and speak to her.
I feel quite helpless at the moment and that I am to blame for this.